Help Needed!!

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danondrums

Well-known member
It takes a serious douche to continue to criticize someone’s grammar after they learned that it’s not their first language.

It’s level 1 douchery to do this in the first place. As if it takes a study in English grammar to be a genius, how ignorant and judgmental can someone be? But to continue on that line after you learned the person speaks five languages.

Unreal.
 

larryace

"Uncle Larry"
It's not the language barriers. It's disrespecting others with callous comments. And in the spirit of not being passive aggressive, I am referring to Alex only. I've witnessed this in the past many times, but never commented, everyone is entitled to their opinions. But it's gone past the point of harmless opinions and graduated into full blown condescension, and I'm calling it out. I'm tired of it. There's no place for that here.

Alex is a very accomplished and knowledgeable drummer, on that no one would disagree. He's a veteran no doubt. His drumming skills are well known.

But I have to say, I'm not a fan of how you treat people here Alex, like at all. Very superior and condescending is the feeling I get. The ha ha's don't help either. I know you meant them harmlessly, but that's the problem. Either you actually don't care about people's feelings for real, or more likely, you simply don't realize how negatively some of your comments make people feel. That's a big problem! I feel embarrassed for you Alex and it makes me cringe when you pepper people with rude and dismissive comments, especially coming from such a skilled player. You could set a better example.

To put it simply Alex, people get pissed off with your callous comments. Myself included. You may not feel that some of your remarks are callous, but yea, they are, in a big way. And it's not a language barrier either. It's hurting your reputation, here at least. It's no exaggeration either. Maybe you could look into that. Everything you say has worth, except when you dismiss people and be purposely rude to them. That behavior does not serve you well at all. It overshadows all the good info you do have.

People need to be treated respectfully, everywhere. Disrespecting someone isn't a language barrier, it's a conscious choice. Ridiculing potential students is not the way to go, like at all. It shouldn't even be a choice to consider. It's verbally abusive. You can do much better than that. People skills are more important than drumming skills.
 
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GetAgrippa

Platinum Member
Wow this thread got off track. So did the original poster get some guidance ? I’d like to hear back from him to see how it turned out. We get lots of fly by questions and questionnaires with no feedback how it went. Come on folks please be civil-show some humanity. I bet if we all pooped on a paper plate that all of them would smell like crap.
 
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oldskoolsoul

Silver Member
Personally, i read all replies on this forum as if we are all speaking to eachother in a bar..

And, within that perspective, i see nothing wrong with what Alex says and how he says things, including all the laughs..

Because, and i am using his own comparison now, how would a doctor or a surgeon react in a bar when a bunch of nonsense is told regarding certain medical issues..?

Most likely they will laugh or react sarcastic too, especially when medical nonsense keeps being repeated over and over again..

Amateurs have opinions and pro’s have knowledge..

And, in my humble opinion, on internet forums these 2 things get confused too much, resulting in threads like this where the thread starter at one moment has no clue anymore about who actually offers help and who not..

Imagine Buddy Rich would have been a member here..

Lol..
 

danondrums

Well-known member
To each his own. I prefer accuracy and truth over attitude/bedside manners. We all have different goals I guess.

I've been in the position of being an expert on some subject matter on something where someone with 50% of the knowledge talks loudly and over me. It's incredibly annoying and it takes away any personal desire to share my knowledge. It's sad to me that those with the knowledge are bullied out of sharing what they know because they don't satisfy everyone's personal "niceness" quotient.

The subject here, transcription of basic drum parts is something I'm weak at and I'm just happy I got to learn something from experts. It was annoying to have to read someone go on and on for posts and paragraphs backpedaling, justifying their incorrect response and then not having the humility to bow out from the conversation and leave it to those who obviously know more. I've been around these people in class and group settings and they slow down the progress for everyone. I fully understand and sympathize with those who have to battle the classic internet problem of "let me interrupt your expertise with my enthusiasm." It's tiring.
 
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Dr_Watso

Platinum Member
To each his own. I prefer accuracy and truth over attitude/bedside manners. We all have different goals I guess.

I've been in the position of being an expert on some subject matter on something where someone with 50% of the knowledge talks loudly and over me. It's incredibly annoying and it takes away any personal desire to share my knowledge. It's sad to me that those with the knowledge are bullied out of sharing what they know because they don't satisfy everyone's personal "niceness" quotient.

The subject here, transcription of basic drum parts is something I'm weak at and I'm just happy I got to learn something from experts. It was annoying to have to read someone go on and on for posts and paragraphs backpedaling, justifying their incorrect response and then not having the humility to bow out from the conversation and leave it to those who obviously know more. I've been around these people in class and group settings and they slow down the progress for everyone. I fully understand and sympathize with those who have to battle the classic internet problem of "let me interrupt your expertise with my enthusiasm." It's tiring.
Good:

I feel your take on this is maybe not correct. Here's a few specific reasons. I would read it as "X" and interpret those note values as "X"; more than happy to expand on that if you need more help!

Bad:

I know you don¨t know what is correct, that¨s why is so funny you keep writing and writting, hahah. Don¨t worry, you are not alone in this, in fact, EVERY thread is like that...

====
There's a big difference between being helpful and supportive, and this. All at once, he dissed our forum(including 'every thread'), and all the members, while laughing outwardly at someone he feels is incorrect... AND THEN (unless I missed something) NOT ACTUALLY HELPING beyond saying "wrong".

He then went ahead and later posted that same video of his playing from the 80's we've all seen 20 times because he brings it out any time he wants to show off his superiority over the rest of us amateurs who weren't on a TV special in 1986... Continuing on to the chest beating "WHERE'S YOUR VIDEO OF YOU ON TV IN THE 80's? HUH? WHERE IS IT?"... Which honestly that's another recurring theme with him. It comes across as arrogant, aggressive and focused on the wrong aspects of being a musician. It's entirely possible for someone to understand theory well or like to talk music but not have a video of them blasting out chops that would impress Alex.

To be clear, Alex has some killer jazz chops and I'm sure he understands theory well too, I like that he's around. That said, like Larry and a few others here I've seen some behavior that I would deem as disrespectful, and I think he could be more helpful and less attitude-y. For sure there are probably culture, disposition, and language differences that can make for misunderstandings, but I feel like as adults we should be able to move past things like that quickly without any devolving, laughing at each other in a mean way, or being generally unhelpful or trying to cast shade on one another.

I will NOT be getting further into this as a discussion, and I'm only chiming in because I've noticed a pattern like Larry did, and I would much prefer if we all used respect and helpfulness as the first resort. Trust me, I like to argue just as much if not more than anyone else here but everyone self included should watch how they phrase their arguments and always refrain from name calling and condescension in ALL directions.

This will conclude my condescending rant about condescending ranters.
 

n1ck

Member
Respect to Uncle Larry for having the balls to speak the truth. It's wack to have to take passive-aggressive BS from people who are seemingly angry that they never got their due. Why go on a message board designed for communication if all you wanna do is lord your knowledge over people (especially when the people doing the lording maybe aren't as knowledgeable as they think they are)? Anyway, I'm a worm here, but I couldn't help but thrown in my two cents! Uncle Larry = hero.
 

danondrums

Well-known member
There’s an ignore button as part of the forum.

Seems a group of people have flat out stated they have a personal problem with how someone communicates.

The ignore button was made for this.

Hope this helps.
 

timmdrum

Silver Member
It takes a serious douche to continue to criticize someone’s grammar after they learned that it’s not their first language.

It’s level 1 douchery to do this in the first place. As if it takes a study in English grammar to be a genius, how ignorant and judgmental can someone be? But to continue on that line after you learned the person speaks five languages.

Unreal.
We will have to agree to disagree. I will not stoop to the depths of name-calling like a middle school kid.

I stand by the opinion that it's ironic and, to me, funny, to correct someone in a manner full of errors. Nothing wrong with using a second, non-native language- matter of fact, I complimented him on that fact, but I guess you missed, or chose to ignore, that- but if one is gonna speak, in ANY language, on the subject of correcting someone on ANY subject, he/she should take the time to make sure the verbiage is free of errors, or if he/she doesn't, he/she and others observing should be willing to accept that others will notice the irony.
 
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timmdrum

Silver Member
So people must know English to be intelligent? That’s your strongest defense here? Grow up.

Ignore button invoked and thread unwatched.
Good, but I'll reply anyway. No, you're incorrect. You're putting words in my mouth (hands). No one needs to know English to be intelligent. To correct someone using English, it's ironic to not make sure the English is correct. No growing up necessary here.
 
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