Music, drumming and mental illness

resohead

Silver Member
I hesitant to post this but I know a lot of artists struggle with this and many don't know it.

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder years ago. I'm always on meds and in therapy. Even with advances in treatment the depression side of the disease can shut you down at any time. It's the reason I've had years go by without playing or caring.

Three months ago my doc added a med to my combo. A week later I was dusting off the practice pad and metronome. Two weeks later I did a major cleaning on my modest Yamaha kit and replaced all the heads.

Next came a stationary bike for cardio.

Somehow my life returned before I recognized what was happening.

I know mental illness, depression, anxiety, etc and I've seen what it can do. I just have to be grateful for this day and hope for more like it but I'll always be looking over my shoulder because I know how fast it all can be taken away.

Maybe some here can relate.
 
I hesitant to post this but I know a lot of artists struggle with this and many don't know it.

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder years ago. I'm always on meds and in therapy. Even with advances in treatment the depression side of the disease can shut you down at any time. It's the reason I've had years go by without playing or caring.

Three months ago my doc added a med to my combo. A week later I was dusting off the practice pad and metronome. Two weeks later I did a major cleaning on my modest Yamaha kit and replaced all the heads.

Next came a stationary bike for cardio.

Somehow my life returned before I recognized what was happening.

I know mental illness, depression, anxiety, etc and I've seen what it can do. I just have to be grateful for this day and hope for more like it but I'll always be looking over my shoulder because I know how fast it all can be taken away.

Maybe some here can relate.

Absolutely, and perhaps a renewed interest in things percussive can assist in maintaining your current recovery and give you a continued interest that will support you over the coming months.

Best of luck and I hope that things continue in this positive vein for you.
 
I have ADD so I tend to hyper-focus (actual word) on things I like and antifocus on things that don't interest me. Did horrible in school and was depressed and suicidal while a teenager. I started playing drums when I was 20 and it calms me down helps me see what in front of me.
 
My wife was mis diagnosed with bipolar, and for years she (and I) were miserable because of all the meds she had to take. I always knew those things were poisonous for her and encouraged her to not take them. Long story short, now she has not been on anything at all for close to 18 months and guess what? She wasn't bipolar in the first place. Now she is a normally functioning human being with normal episodes of ups and downs, not exaggerated episodes of ups and downs. There's a lot more to this story how she was able to get off the meds in the first place, but she's off them and now she has her life back.

I don't trust the medical profession. If you need to set a bone, or need an antibiotic OK. But beyond that, It's in their best interest to keep you sick. Don't get me started on this topic. She was on so many different drugs...They don't want to heal away a source of income....it's sickening, literally.

I can't speak intelligently about your situation, so I will with hold any comments other than to say I'm glad that you seem to be feeling better, and to encourage you to keep drumming in your life. It will help keep you on track.
 
Sorry to hear about things, but I relate. I'll be blunt though - all doctors know how to do is push drugs instead of trying to deal with the underlying cause. It could be a nutritional deficiency you are going through. I would seek help from a nutritionist or homeopath or chiropractor. The United States is 4% of the world's population, we consume 70% of the world's perscription drugs yet are 40th healthiest country. Obviously the American "medical model" (cut, burn, drug) is a total failure.

Play drums. Get outdoors. Eat healthier. Fire your doctor :) Best of luck.
 
My wife was mis diagnosed with bipolar, and for years she (and I) were miserable because of all the meds she had to take. I always knew those things were poisonous for her and encouraged her to not take them. Long story short, now she has not been on anything at all for close to 18 months and guess what? She wasn't bipolar in the first place. Now she is a normally functioning human being with normal episodes of ups and downs, not exaggerated episodes of ups and downs. There's a lot more to this story how she was able to get off the meds in the first place, but she's off them and now she has her life back.

I don't trust the medical profession. If you need to set a bone, or need an antibiotic OK. But beyond that, It's in their best interest to keep you sick. Don't get me started on this topic. She was on so many different drugs...They don't want to heal away a source of income....it's sickening, literally.

I can't speak intelligently about your situation, so I will with hold any comments other than to say I'm glad that you seem to be feeling better, and to encourage you to keep drumming in your life. It will help keep you on track.

Great Larrys think alike. I'm with you 100%.
 
Great Larrys think alike. I'm with you 100%.

Great Larrys, both from Pennsylvania, think even more alike lol.

Where in PA RU? I think I recognize the place in your avatar lol. Lehigh County, right?
 
Drumming has therepeutic value. I started playing when I was 16- I was an extremely unfocused kid with classic ADD (before that term was invented). Drumming brought focus to my nervous energy, gave me an outlet and a hobby, and even helped me meet people and form social circles. It really did change my life completely.
 
My wife was mis diagnosed with bipolar, and for years she (and I) were miserable because of all the meds she had to take. I always knew those things were poisonous for her and encouraged her to not take them. Long story short, now she has not been on anything at all for close to 18 months and guess what? She wasn't bipolar in the first place. Now she is a normally functioning human being with normal episodes of ups and downs, not exaggerated episodes of ups and downs. There's a lot more to this story how she was able to get off the meds in the first place, but she's off them and now she has her life back.

I don't trust the medical profession. If you need to set a bone, or need an antibiotic OK. But beyond that, It's in their best interest to keep you sick. Don't get me started on this topic. She was on so many different drugs...They don't want to heal away a source of income....it's sickening, literally.

I can't speak intelligently about your situation, so I will with hold any comments other than to say I'm glad that you seem to be feeling better, and to encourage you to keep drumming in your life. It will help keep you on track.


Glad to see I'm not the only one who feels this way. My wife has been a slave to Big Pharma for years and is just now starting to see some light at the end of a very dark and lonely tunnel.

She's been misdiagnosed with everything from Fibromyalgia to Lupus to Mixed Connective Tissue Disorder, to about a dozen other made up catch-all disorders over the years. She's been on most every pain drug there is at one point. Some of the dosages were insane. It's been a nightmare. But she was convinced for the longest time that the next pill or the next Doctor was going to fix it all. And every Doctor was more than willing to keep ramping up dosages and switching around to whatever the drug of the month was. It made me sick to watch. I started going to her appointments and would confront the Doctors point blank on why they felt it was necessary for my wife to take 15 pills a day and be a friggin zombie. Every damn one of them could sit there and look me right in the eye and justify every pill.

All along I kept telling her that all the drugs were what was causing the symptoms she was experiencing, the migraines, the muscular and joint pain, etc, etc, etc, and that the doctors were putting her on more pills to fix the side effects of the other pills, and that is was a viscous circle that she was caught in. She didn't want to believe it. She kept slipping deeper and deeper into a drugged, depressed, stupor until she finally tried to commit suicide.a couple years ago. That's when she finally started to see the light.

After years of trying to talk some sense, I think I have finally gotten through. For the past few years I've been pushing and pushing her to start using medical marijuana and ween herself of the drugs. She finally gave it a chance, and after about a year she is completely off all the pain meds. I am starting to see the woman I married 15 years ago emerging from the drug induced coma she's been in for so long. She actually has a sense of humor again. She's a completely different person And guess what? All her "symptoms" from all these bogus diagnosis' are going away. hmmm???

I have huge issues with Big Pharma and the medical industry at large as well. I agree that there are amazing advances being made every day in medical science that are funded by these corporations, but it's the darker side of that industry that supports getting people hooked on pills for made up conditions that makes me sick.


resohead, I am also glad you are doing better and have found what works for you. Keep it up.
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Thanks. Didn't have any intention of opening a can of worms here but people have strong opinions on psychiatry, meds, misdiagnosis, etc. So do I.

Unfortunately, I'm certified bipolar I and I have the maniacally out of my mind emergency psych ward visits to back me up. If I didn't take Lithium and other mood stabilizers, I'd be dead. No doubt.

The reason that psychiatrists 'pill you to death' as my mother once said is because 1 out of 5 people with this illness kill themselves. It's a lethal disease.

It's not always totally manic / totally depressed, it has an awful lot to do with interest and energy levels. All the coping mechanisms mentioned here are good advice but I would never, ever, ever tell someone that was bipolar to stop their medication. Many do stop because their brain is addicted to mania. Some even live to tell the tale.

So, I back the meds up with therapy, exercise, bipolar support group meetings, mh forums and lots of reading. Nobody should just swallow pills and expect them to fix things all by themselves, but I've seen that happen, too.

Time to beat the drums!!!
 
Glad to see I'm not the only one who feels this way. My wife has been a slave to Big Pharma for years and is just now starting to see some light at the end of a very dark and lonely tunnel.

She's been misdiagnosed with everything from Fibromyalgia to Lupus to Mixed Connective Tissue Disorder, to about a dozen other made up catch-all disorders over the years. She's been on most every pain drug there is at one point. Some of the dosages were insane. It's been a nightmare. But she was convinced for the longest time that the next pill or the next Doctor was going to fix it all. And every Doctor was more than willing to keep ramping up dosages and switching around to whatever the drug of the month was. It made me sick to watch. I started going to her appointments and would confront the Doctors point blank on why they felt it was necessary for my wife to take 15 pills a day and be a friggin zombie. Every damn one of them could sit there and look me right in the eye and justify every pill.

All along I kept telling her that all the drugs were what was causing the symptoms she was experiencing, the migraines, the muscular and joint pain, etc, etc, etc, and that the doctors were putting her on more pills to fix the side effects of the other pills, and that is was a viscous circle that she was caught in. She didn't want to believe it. She kept slipping deeper and deeper into a drugged, depressed, stupor until she finally tried to commit suicide.a couple years ago. That's when she finally started to see the light.

After years of trying to talk some sense, I think I have finally gotten through. For the past few years I've been pushing and pushing her to start using medical marijuana and ween herself of the drugs. She finally gave it a chance, and after about a year she is completely off all the pain meds. I am starting to see the woman I married 15 years ago emerging from the drug induced coma she's been in for so long. She actually has a sense of humor again. She's a completely different person And guess what? All her "symptoms" from all these bogus diagnosis' are going away. hmmm???

I have huge issues with Big Pharma and the medical industry at large as well. I agree that there are amazing advances being made every day in medical science that are funded by these corporations, but it's the darker side of that industry that supports getting people hooked on pills for made up conditions that makes me sick.


resohead, I am also glad you are doing better and have found what works for you. Keep it up.
.

Wow. Just Wow. Yea, I've been on suicide watch more times than I care to recall. We are kindred spirits THC. I share your disgust for that aspect of the medical profession. They are bad bad drug pushers, no less. Funny you mentioned the connective tissue disorder. My baby is presently diagnosed with that too. She is on zero drugs though, other than MM, which I don't even consider a drug. Drugs can kill you, MM will not. The change in her is literally night and day. I have a real, normal healthy wife now, not some drugged up, fragile shell of a woman. I could have wrote what you just said, I know EXACTLY what you are going through. Or went through, hopefully. Keep her off those Big Pharma poisons. They're toxic to humans.
 
Great Larrys, both from Pennsylvania, think even more alike lol.

Where in PA RU? I think I recognize the place in your avatar lol. Lehigh County, right?

Hey, I'm in the land of Steelers though I prefer baseball and the loser Pirates. The photo is of the Kinzua Bridge near Allegheny National Forest. I guess a tornado partially destroyed in a few years ago and it still is untouched. A magnificent photo-op..
 
Re: Drum and Bass drumming

If you don't recognize the fact that we live longer now then ever before, and completely due to modern medicine then your lying to yourself. Technology allows us to sit around all day, industry allows us to eat from our cars...medicine and the "poison pills" allows us to live an extra 25 years all while counter acting heart disease and diabetes....
 
I think we've all been depressed now and then. If you haven't, then you're lucky. I think I was born with a chip on my shoulder and a beef against authority and society. Society has always been a big source of depression for me. If I think about it all and the way the world is, I can get really, really down. Growing up I saw the adults in my family as a perfect example of living the ways I would never choose to be. I've changed very little in that perspective. There's not a whole lot of people who really impress me. I guess I'm just not a people person and never have been, but I try to get along and leave a positive impression on people despite my ambivalence towards society in general. Knowing my own mom and all the pitfalls that Larry eluded to regarding his wife and the medical profession, I've never taken the meds myself. I think getting plenty of sunshine, healthy eating, proper vitamins, and exercise is the most important thing. But also, having a healthy outlet like playing drums and socializing with like minded musicians has been the one thing that keeps me going sometimes. Sometimes that's the only thing that keeps me going.

My understanding is that there are two types of depression, situational and clinical. Situational can be changed by changing the situation that causes the depression. Some people are psychic vampires who suck all the positive energy out of others. When I was around this type of person, it had a severe affect on me. So, despite all the guilt that this person laid on me, I had to separate myself from this situation. I believe that if you allow yourself to be in a situational depression for too long, it will alter your brain's chemistry and eventually develop into clinical depression. That's when the doc has you by the gonads.
 
Damn. Don't take it personally but it seems half of the population in the USA has ADD or bipolar disorder.
I mean, it seems the diagnostics are being given a bit too fast. And ALSO, meds for this kind of condition can be harmful and you have to be very serious about this but it looks like it's 'normal' to take this if the doctor says so. Kind of scary for an european.

Well back to the point. I know what you're talking about since I'm suffering from depression for something like 4 years now. I don't even remember. I've eaten a lot of sh**, sorry to say, but I don't know how I made it this far. Sometimes, mental pain is just unbearable.
All I can say is, whenever I have a good drumming session, everything feels right again. The energy you give to your drums seems to be brought back to you 10 times stronger. And the more you play, the better it gets.
It feels like when you play and get inspiration by connecting with your mind and your body so much that all the anxiety and the stupid questions and things that usually run through your mind are taken away. I also play piano and guitar but they never gave me such a feeling, at least not as strong.

I hope that wasn't a scary post ^^
 
I have a brother who has been dealing with sever depression, bi-polar and schiz. for the last 20 years (that we know of).

I've seen it all with him from hospitals to arrests - the good, bad and the ugly - to the brink of death (literally) and back.

Hang in there my friend and hopefully music helps keep you heading forward in a positive way.
 
Re: Drum and Bass drumming

...medicine and the "poison pills" allows us to live an extra 25 years all while counter acting heart disease and diabetes....

No doubt we're living longer but a lot of the time people are just existing longer - but it ain't living. Many, many people are turning back into babies - total focus on themselves and their body excretions, helplessness, unable to understand most of what goes on. Then they spent the last of their lives without dignity.

Too much focus on existence and not enough life. Same with society in general - how about the way legal liability is extending its tendrils into everything we do to make living harder.

As for the thread, I was diagnosed ADHD in early middle age. The meds weren't good for me. I did once have good luck with anti-depressants. After a life spent in regular depression Zoloft stabilised me and I got out of the hair-trigger mental habit I'd developed over decades of falling in a heap at the slightest problem.

Once I was good, I weaned off them. I had a couple of depressions since but I got over them quickly organically and I stopped using the drug.

I suspect my ADHD helped draw me towards drumming - I found it suitably maniacal :) So for years there were no lessons or books or any kind of studious approach - just going hell for leather. Since I was a social pariah it suited me to spend hours daily on the kit and, once it was late, the pads.

I've mellowed with age along with my work ethic ...
 
I hesitant to post this but I know a lot of artists struggle with this and many don't know it.

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder years ago. I'm always on meds and in therapy. Even with advances in treatment the depression side of the disease can shut you down at any time. It's the reason I've had years go by without playing or caring.

Three months ago my doc added a med to my combo. A week later I was dusting off the practice pad and metronome. Two weeks later I did a major cleaning on my modest Yamaha kit and replaced all the heads.

Next came a stationary bike for cardio.

Somehow my life returned before I recognized what was happening.

I know mental illness, depression, anxiety, etc and I've seen what it can do. I just have to be grateful for this day and hope for more like it but I'll always be looking over my shoulder because I know how fast it all can be taken away.

Maybe some here can relate.

I can't relate directly as I haven't taken any prescribed medications other than antibiotics.

But it is good to hear the right combination of medication and motivation worked for you. There is so much to enjoy in life and I am happy for you.
 
I don't trust the medical profession. If you need to set a bone, or need an antibiotic OK. But beyond that, It's in their best interest to keep you sick. Don't get me started on this topic. She was on so many different drugs...They don't want to heal away a source of income....it's sickening, literally.

I can't speak intelligently about your situation, so I will with hold any comments other than to say I'm glad that you seem to be feeling better, and to encourage you to keep drumming in your life. It will help keep you on track.

Same here. I know so many people that are on multiple medicines. Instead of trying to take patients off meds, the docs just leep adjusting them and adding more. In many cases I don't see any better quality of life for them. It seems anyone with any anomoly is instantly placed on meds. I have my ups and downs, and I get depressed from time to time, and I'm probably somewhat ADD. But I thank God every day that I am not on any regular medications. Nor is my wife or my kids. And I want to keep it that way as long as possible.

I'm not saying there aren't cases where meds are absolutely necessary. I've seen people with severe depression get their life back after taking meds. But I still think drugs are way over prescribed in this country. It's all about the money.
 
I really can't think of one really talented artist that doesn't suffer from some form of mental illness or anxiety. I myself am OCD, ADHD, and suffer from Acute Paranoia Syndrome. If it weren't for medication I'd be a complete mess. But I think a lot about this. I compose a lot. It's my stress reliever. If you think back to the great composers of generations past. Not a single one of them was 'fully there.' Maybe it's our mental illnesses that give us our talents. . .
 
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