What do you do when you have a gig but a better one comes up?

petey

Member
I have a non-paying gig that I agreed to do (reluctantly) to help out a friend that has been asking and asking to jam together and after turning down a few he's offered (which were really bad nights/gigs), I finally said yes. And wouldn't you know it ... NOW, a very good $320 paying night gig has come up the same night and has been offered to me. It is a very easy no hassle gig and would be a lot of fun.

I'm a believer in honoring your commitment once you agree to do a gig but I could really, really use the money. Decisions, Decisions.
 

Dr_Watso

Platinum Member
Tell him. Let him know you would really like his blessing to take the paying show as you need the money. If he insists, I'd do the gig for him, then never take another with him as well.
 

WhoIsTony?

Member
I honor my obligations always

and for the record I NEVER play a non paying gig unless it is for a very good friend ... and the good friend would always understand if I needed to pull out for pay....but I most likely would not pull out

but for $320 my buddy would understand
 

bermuda

Drummerworld Pro Drummer - Administrator
Staff member
I honor my obligations always
Agreed, I do as well with only one exception: if Al should come up with something that presents a conflict. But, all of my bands know that they defer to him when it comes to my involvement. It's very rare, I recall that it's happened once or twice.

But no, I never change up a confirmed gig without a valid, non-monetary reason. Relationships are important with my bands, and I won't damage any of them just to make an extra $50 or $100.

Tell him. Let him know you would really like his blessing to take the paying show as you need the money.
In this particular situation (a paid gig vs a free one,) it certainly doesn't hurt to ask!

Bermuda
 

Hollywood Jim

Platinum Member
I agree with what others have said.

By the way, I will play your paying gig for you for $50. And I will give you the remaining $270.

.
 

petey

Member
I agree, I really like to honor my gig commitments and always do. I'm going to at least ask in a delicate way somehow, without offending anyone for this one to see if I can get out of it. Thanks Watso

I'm with you WhoIsTony, I think from now on i'm not going to do any non-paying gigs unless it's for a really good friend, which isn't the case in this particular situation for me....This is Just an acquaintance that has been after me to join his band, jam, kind of a needy guy, always hitting me up, so I agreed to finally just help him out with one gig.

Thanks for that advice, Bermuda, appreciate it.

My time is valuable and I have a family to support, but sometimes I'm too nice a guy and try and help people out free-of-charge.
 

Skitch

Pioneer Member
I agree, I really like to honor my gig commitments and always do. I'm going to at least ask in a delicate way somehow, without offending anyone for this one to see if I can get out of it. Thanks Watso

I'm with you WhoIsTony, I think from now on i'm not going to do any non-paying gigs unless it's for a really good friend, which isn't the case in this particular situation for me....This is Just an acquaintance that has been after me to join his band, jam, kind of a needy guy, always hitting me up, so I agreed to finally just help him out with one gig.

Thanks for that advice, Bermuda, appreciate it.

My time is valuable and I have a family to support, but sometimes I'm too nice a guy and try and help people out free-of-charge.
I always try to honor my commitment but, in this case, I would be proactive and solve this problem my own. Yes, money talks and I would find a drummer to sub in the non-paying gig and offer to pay him, yes pay him, $60-75-$90 to play my non-paying gig. You would still come out ahead money-wise and pretty much have solved the problem of finding another drummer for your friend’s non-paying gig. Your angle to him is that you have already solved the problem and this is an activity that he won't have to be involved in. Being a friend who understands your situation, he should be ok with it. There is a difference between disappointment and anger and a rational adult should understand the difference and freindship isn't a one way street. You wouild be suprised how well this approach works!

Furthermore, if it is non-paying, it isn’t a gig; it’s a hobby for somebody. Money talks and the BS walks.


Mike

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longgun

Gold Member
I'd also recommend talking to him...................most musicians would understand..............or maybe find him a competent replacement

If he still wants you to do the gig, I'd do it................your word and reputation is worth way more than a $350 gig IMO
 

Odd-Arne Oseberg

Platinum Member
I think it's important to homour agreements, but there are ways around it. Maybe you can find a sub.

I quit a band short notice once, but that was because I was completely broke and was offered a solid job on the other side of the country. They probably never found quite the same guitar player, but I think they never really got anywhere either.
 

MileHighDrummer

Senior Member
I have a non-paying gig that I agreed to do (reluctantly) to help out a friend that has been asking and asking to jam together and after turning down a few he's offered (which were really bad nights/gigs),
Petey, you've conveniently left out all necessary pertinent information that would be needed to make a complete suggestion. Your knowledge of the situation makes you the only one who can decide whether this gig is necessary to play.


Furthermore, if it is non-paying, it isn’t a gig; it’s a hobby for somebody. Money talks and the BS walks. Mike. [/url]
I have actually appeared at many non-paying gigs over my career for special events, fund raisers and benefits... that were extremely important to someone. I would never have considered them BS or considered backing out of one of them for any amount of money.

If a good friend of mine asked me to play for free I already know it's important.
 
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Les Ismore

Platinum Member
I have a non-paying gig that I agreed to do (reluctantly) to help out a friend that has been asking and asking to jam together and after turning down a few he's offered (which were really bad nights/gigs), I finally said yes. And wouldn't you know it ... NOW, a very good $320 paying night gig has come up the same night and has been offered to me. It is a very easy no hassle gig and would be a lot of fun.

I'm a believer in honoring your commitment once you agree to do a gig but I could really, really use the money. Decisions, Decisions.

This is easy.

You said "Reluctantly". You also say this guy is a friend. Well your obligation is to yourself first, any friend should realize that. You say you could really use the money, that's the deciding factor IMO.

As a courtesy I would line up a sub first as in "Can you do this free gig for me... contingent on if they OK you as a sub?" kinda thing, with what ever else you need to say. Then call your friend and tell him the truth, you need (could really use) the money, you got a sub lined up if they want to play that person etc. etc.

If the guy is really your friend, he'll say "Yeah, no problem, go do the money gig."

If he says "NO, you committed!" then you've got something else to think about.
 

GruntersDad

Administrator - Mayor
Staff member
I'm a believer in honoring your commitment once you agree to do a gig...

Your answer.

Money comes and goes. A bad rep for gigs will haunt you.
 

GeoB

Gold Member
Define gig.

Is Al's a gig or a party favor?

Gig's pay (at least in my definition they do) anything else is a jam.

And you're jamming with your band? That sounds like a rehearsal to me.

Is it Al's wedding? If so, keep it.

If it's just a party favor, Al should understand that you need the cash.

Additionally, the paying gig could lead to other work. Does farting around over at Al's offer any promotional advancements? Didn't think so...

Tough call? Perhaps not. But you do owe it to Al for a face to face. He should understand but if he doesn't he's being selfish at your expense.

My 2cents.
 

rmandelbaum

Platinum Member
I personally always honor my agreements, trust is more important that money.

That being said, may e you know someone that can cover for you and you can maintain the friendship and take the paying gig.
 

Vintage Old School

Gold Member
Honor your word and play the gig for your friend. Your services are for sale, but not your integrity. Being a man of your word will always pay off in spades in the future.
 

Bonzodownunder

Senior Member
FWIW i've recently turned down 2 high profile&higher paying gigs.WHY? it's NOT because the current band i'm in is paying more or has a higher profile or even more gigs.It's BECAUSE i believe in loyalty&freinship this's my VERY 1st EVER gig &i owe it to both myself&this band to see where it takes me.Also it's experience btw one of the gigs required me to trigger sounds&play with a electronic kit neither of which i've expereince in.IMHO freindship&loyalty outweigh money each&every time i have a 5 day a week job so DONT need the extra money.
 
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