I've found that getting the right dynamic level between the limbs has helped my groove and feel tremendously. As I play, I try to get the right balance between limbs, and then take that overall setting louder. I've never been a hard hitter, but rimshot backbeats using the butt end of the stick helps me put the snare up front in my dynamic mix, in a rock band situation.
This exercise has been extremely helpful to me:
http://www.rhythmelodic.com/RoachExercise.pdf
Yeah, that's so true and you don't hear it mentioned much. Getting the individual drum/limb dynamics is key to a successful groove.
Then it doesn't matter what 'master' volume you play at it'll work for the most part.
Back when I first started playing and was young, full of energy and had genuine enthusiasm for life I remember the school drum teacher pointing out I needed to work on my limb dynamics.
I was hitting the hi-hats like my snare!
I think that was the best thing he ever taught me, I'm conscious of it always.
I play loud, my drums drown the band next door out! they hate us, unsuprisingly but, I barely hit my cymbals. I personally like that 'record' kit sound where the drums are big and the cymbals slightly to the back, and that's how I try to sound when I play.
I got a few nice compliments of people back at college saying when I played the same basic beat as this other guy mine sounded great and his was crap. He was playing probably just as tight as me but, the individual dynamics make it groove.
Like I said earlier on here though, some things only groove at their designated volume. I only ever groove latin beats and jazz at lower volumes. The drum god just says 'NO'! When I try to increase it.