nervous about the first drum lesson

PaisteDrummer95

Well-known member
Good evening you all, I never was someone who was fortunate enough to have many drum lessons and I wasn’t even fortunate enough to have good teachers. To be honest, my previous drum lessons were horrible experiences.

Just an important background view:

when I had my very first, first lesson it was with the leader of the schools band, he was a self taught drummer who played for 45 years, when he taught his usual subjects he was a very popular teacher, friendly, funny. However when he taught drum lessons to me there was an entire different person standing in front of me, wanting me to play fast and hard 8th notes on the Hihat and yelling at me for not being fast enough and not playing hard enough.

But the most worse experience was, that he accidentally hit me when playing and showing me the beat again, it was the first time a stick hitting on my skin accidentally ever and because the hit was in a rimshot way I immediately got a blackout inside of my head, fighting against the pain while acting like I wasn’t hit. After this, I swore I’d never take drum lessons again.

But the time being self taught I got such a difficult tendinitis that I decided once it was healed that I’d try it again.
My second teacher was a show-off he played each beat with 150 bpm and closed eyes, wanted me to look at the Tips how they behave during performance which I of course avoided as there was just one kit which I sat behind and he stood and I was pretty sure he’d hit me in the face accidentally when I’d do so which resulted in being yelled at.

I also got yelled at when I asked him how many years he’s already playing with the secret intend to find out why he couldn’t solve the problems I came into the lesson with.
This was, when I finally quit.

After that I was looking for my third teacher and applied for a public music school and had to wait six months to even get a first lesson. While waiting on the big day I’ve heard how the teacher yelled at a previous student for playing bad 16th notes. I entered and played and for me it was a normal first lesson with him except for a comment about the way I walk, that wasn’t appropriate and then I got told that the waiting list was full.

After that I again was self taught again with not progressing, having injuries due to wrong technique and so on.

Now after a longer time I can start to play again (at least on my Practice Pad) and tomorrow I have my fourth first lesson with a teacher and despite being all online due to local music schools being occupied by too many students, I feel so nervous, I can’t enjoy anything I do, as all I can do is to think about the lesson and how my new teacher will be like, the worry to drop a stick during the lesson or even worse to have him see how I kind of hit myself somewhere accidentally and I can’t even say one thing making sense in conversations already.

On the other hand of course there’s a positive excitement but the nervousness is strongest.

What can I do to be less nervous? Please help me!
 
Last edited:

MrInsanePolack

Platinum Member
True, but each bad experience makes me more nervous, tho.
That's anxiety. Nothing to be worried about. You are just seeking help from a qualified individual.

If you drop a stick, no big deal. Your new teacher drops sticks too.

It might help if you explain your nervousness and hesitation to the teacher, and explain to them that you don't want to injure yourself. A quality teacher will take that into consideration, and I'm sure you wont be the first.
 

Auspicious

Silver Member
True, but each bad experience makes me more nervous, tho.
Some kind of thought virus, this is going to happen all the time in life. Try to find find a way to cope with it by understanding the mental process leading to you being nervous. It can be explained by searching the deep causes.

Perhaps reading some positive quotes can help, like these:

Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm. – Winston S. Churchill
or
Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts. – Winston S. Churchill
 

PaisteDrummer95

Well-known member
That's anxiety. Nothing to be worried about. You are just seeking help from a qualified individual.

If you drop a stick, no big deal. Your new teacher drops sticks too.

It might help if you explain your nervousness and hesitation to the teacher, and explain to them that you don't want to injure yourself. A quality teacher will take that into consideration, and I'm sure you wont be the first.
Pros still do that?
Even when I look weird as the shock moment gets me?

Can I really tell such things?
Yet I always tried to hide it but I found it embarrassing to appear this weak.


Some kind of thought virus, this is going to happen all the time in life. Try to find find a way to cope with it by understanding the mental process leading to you being nervous. It can be explained by searching the deep causes.

Perhaps reading some positive quotes can help, like these:

Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm. – Winston S. Churchill
or
Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts. – Winston S. Churchill
Well, I think I kind of understood the most parts of anxiety.
I had bad experiences, I don’t want to make them again, I don’t want to embarrass myself.
 

jazzerooty

Junior Member
Good evening you all, I never was someone who was fortunate enough to have many drum lessons and I wasn’t even fortunate enough to have good teachers. To be honest, my previous drum lessons were horrible experiences.

Just an important background view:

when I had my very first, first lesson it was with the leader of the schools band, he was a self taught drummer who played for 45 years, when he taught his usual subjects he was a very popular teacher, friendly, funny. However when he taught drum lessons to me there was an entire different person standing in front of me, wanting me to play fast and hard 8th notes on the Hihat and yelling at me for not being fast enough and not playing hard enough.

But the most worse experience was, that he accidentally hit me when playing and showing me the beat again, it was the first time a stick hitting on my skin accidentally ever and because the hit was in a rimshot way I immediately got a blackout inside of my head, fighting against the pain while acting like I wasn’t hit. After this, I swore I’d never take drum lessons again.

But the time being self taught I got such a difficult tendinitis that I decided once it was healed that I’d try it again.
My second teacher was a show-off he played each beat with 150 bpm and closed eyes, wanted me to look at the Tips how they behave during performance which I of course avoided as there was just one kit which I sat behind and he stood and I was pretty sure he’d hit me in the face accidentally when I’d do so which resulted in being yelled at.

I also got yelled at when I asked him how many years he’s already playing with the secret intend to find out why he couldn’t solve the problems I came into the lesson with.
This was, when I finally quit.

After that I was looking for my third teacher and applied for a public music school and had to wait six months to even get a first lesson. While waiting on the big day I’ve heard how the teacher yelled at a previous student for playing bad 16th notes. I entered and played and for me it was a normal first lesson with him except for a comment about the way I walk, that wasn’t appropriate and then I got told that the waiting list was full.

After that I again was self taught again with not progressing, having injuries due to wrong technique and so on.

Now after a longer time I can start to play again (at least on my Practice Pad) and tomorrow I have my fourth first lesson with a teacher and despite being all online due to local music schools being occupied by too many students, I feel so nervous, I can’t enjoy anything I do, as all I can do is to think about the lesson and how my new teacher will be like, the worry to drop a stick during the lesson or even worse to have him see how I kind of hit myself somewhere accidentally and I can’t even say one thing making sense in conversations already.

On the other hand of course there’s a positive excitement but the nervousness is strongest.

What can I do to be less nervous? Please help me!
Nothing you said indicates anything wrong with you. Both those teachers were--no other word--"jagoffs," and shouldn't be allowed near students. I've had good and bad teachers on my way up. My first teacher told me I needn't learn the rudiments. When I indicated I wanted to learn traditonal grip he told me it was unecessary, and refused. There are many fine drum instructors. There are also tons of charletons, fakes, ignoramus's, folks who can't explain anything, or rigid technicians who will never help you with music. It's a minefield. Don't know where you live. If it's a small town, you may have to drive. Find an urban area, and call the drum shops and universities who's the best teacher. Get to know good drummers, and ask them the same question. You don't need to feel nervous if the teacher is a good one. The good ones won't treat you like those two monkeys. And if the new teach is a jerk, give him "The Bird," and leave.
 

PaisteDrummer95

Well-known member
Break a leg!
American Saying or even version of the German saying:“ Leg and Head break!“?
Nothing you said indicates anything wrong with you. Both those teachers were--no other word--"jagoffs," and shouldn't be allowed near students. I've had good and bad teachers on my way up. My first teacher told me I needn't learn the rudiments. When I indicated I wanted to learn traditonal grip he told me it was unecessary, and refused. There are many fine drum instructors. There are also tons of charletons, fakes, ignoramus's, folks who can't explain anything, or rigid technicians who will never help you with music. It's a minefield. Don't know where you live. If it's a small town, you may have to drive. Find an urban area, and call the drum shops and universities who's the best teacher. Get to know good drummers, and ask them the same question. You don't need to feel nervous if the teacher is a good one. The good ones won't treat you like those two monkeys. And if the new teach is a jerk, give him "The Bird," and leave.
You’re absolutely right. I live in Germany in a rather small town, there arent many schools / drum teachers in the whole area. What do you mean by „give him The Bird“? Sounds funny but don’t get it.
 

MrInsanePolack

Platinum Member
Pros still do that?
Even when I look weird as the shock moment gets me?

Can I really tell such things?
Yet I always tried to hide it but I found it embarrassing to appear this weak.
Yep. Maybe not often, but we all still do.

You can tell your teacher anything you feel is relevant. There is a good chance the teacher may ask you what you want to get out of it. You are paying them to teach you. Let them know your goals.
 

Rock Salad

Junior Member
American Saying or even version of the German saying:“ Leg and Head break!“?

You’re absolutely right. I live in Germany in a rather small town, there arent many schools / drum teachers in the whole area. What do you mean by „give him The Bird“? Sounds funny but don’t get it.
Excuse me! I forget about the automatic translation.


Press the thumbs?

Edit: ok, found it. Yes, like leg and head break
 

PaisteDrummer95

Well-known member
Yep. Maybe not often, but we all still do.

You can tell your teacher anything you feel is relevant. There is a good chance the teacher may ask you what you want to get out of it. You are paying them to teach you. Let them know your goals.
Ok, this will feel like crossing some inner boundaries but I will do it but perhaps I can’t do anything else.


Excuse me! I forget about the automatic translation.


Press the thumbs?

Edit: ok, found it. Yes, like leg and head break
Thank you. We also say „Press the Thumbs“ but this way I understand it. I definitely can need it.
 

PaisteDrummer95

Well-known member
Firstly none of those first "teachers" were teachers at all they were stupid inadequate bullies. You now know what to look for....find someone, give him 30 mins, any more of that shit, walk.
Thanks, the worst thing is, you don’t directly notice at the first lesson I think.
 
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