I think the main issue with me Bo is distraction. This gig for example, I was running the stage & FOH sound for the mini festival, therefore my setup & breakdown was hardly hassle free, plus handing the desk over to someone else (who got the monitor feed numbers mixed up badly). Essentially. I had zero time to get into playing mode, & that's never a good thing.
I think that's your main issue, right there, Andy. I know you like to stay busy and deeply care about the whole band package, but by taking on so much responsibility and keeping track of and managing so much stuff, you really can't be surprised that when it's show time, you've still got all these residual elements competing for that same precious RAM.
Imagine a scenario where you could duck out for an hour or two before show time to clear your mind and/or take a nap. Like a reboot for the old brain. I know, I know, totally not practical, and maybe not even desirable since it seems pretty clear that you really enjoy all those other roles you're playing, so take that for whatever it's worth.
After some heavy scrutinizing of your evidence and after a period of deliberation, this juror has to vote 'not guilty'. I get what you're saying in terms of how your versions may have deviated from the original version's bpm, because I'm sure they probably did. But what I'm saying is, Who the hell cares as long as it still sounds good? Honestly, if that's you at your worst on an off night, then you might consider taking a hit out on your perfectionist side. I agree that you have a pretty good handle on keeping steady time and smooth feel, so even if it is faster or slower on this song or that song, or pushes or pulls here and there, it still sounds like you're owning it and it's still comfortable.
The only criticism I might offer up is your snare tuning. Not that it sounds bad (quite the opposite), but for a lot of the older rock numbers, especially the slower Floyd/Prince-type ballads, that high sharp crack is a little out of place, IMO. Imagine Stewart Copeland's snare on just about any Journey track, especially the Steve Smith power ballads. There's just something a bit too staccato and harsh about it where something a little more lush and deep might lull you into a more relaxed state for some of those songs. I don't mean Don Henley soggy, just something where the attack isn't quite the jarring contrast to the attack of the toms.
Any chance you could take a second snare tuned down a notch that you could quickly switch out that wouldn't wreck the FOH sound?