is this being unreasonable? (chat request from other band member)

Glad it worked out. I was going to say.., tearing down and getting fully loaded in under an hour is pretty reasonable. I usually am done in 25-35 minutes depending on the venue (distance to car etc). But its taken years of perfecting my ultimate drum kit and methods of efficient packing and transport. Things like; a roller cart, hardware bag on wheels, ski boot bag back pack lightweight bags for the shells. Also things like order of ops.. at the end of the show I place the shell / cymbal bags (stacked inside my kick bag) - beside my drum chair with hardware bags on the other side. I tear down sitting in my chair.. quick release cymbal toppers and cymbals in the bag first. Mics and cables 2nd.. I use a small padded tom bag for that although I have a road case (too heavy). 3rd, fire 3 toms, snare and kick into the bags. 4th, break down all stands and distribute into 2 hardware bags evenly weighted. 5th, pedal, drum chair and mic bag go into a tote - and done In about 10 minutes... and sitting down the whole time.
Then its just loading the cart, donning the backpack (contains stickbag, monster cowbell, towel and shirts) and rolling a hardware bag to the trunk.i could do it in one trip in a pinch but usually do it in 2 as its just less hassle getting through doors.Lots of time leftover to chat.. or a drink… but always pack up first - and never leave gear unattended.. and dont let strangers help you move gear. The worst is some drunk who insists on helping.. like no thanks!!
 
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Personally, I avoid the carpooling altogether. I may want to go early and meet other friends, or stay later to see other friends. My time with the band is limited to the soundcheck and the time playing. Other than that, I may not be able to stand you. It all helps with my own sanity.
 
I'm currently on a self imposed month long hiatus from my band after we had words for very similar reasons. They do nothing ( and I mean NOTHING) to help with the band gear. They are straight outside after the last song to drink and smoke and socialise, so after my kit is put away and loaded I end up doing the entire pa and lightshow, right down to the very last lead, on my own. Once that's loaded I have to go get them to get in the van so I can drive them home. I let it go on for far too long before I finally snapped. I've agreed to go back - but I will be driving myself and only doing my gear and the lights (cos I run the show) and then going home and leaving the rest of the gear and the rest of the band to sort themselves out.
 
Totally unreasonable communication - I'm fortunate that my bandmates, and sometimes my friends /relatives at the gig help me load out. I take the lights and band banner and poles as well. Sometimes I'm delayed packing up because punters want to chat to the drummer, which I consider important PR. If i got left behind it would be my resignation from the band.
 
AudioWonderland said:
I don't do couples in the band. That never ends well. This is a perfect example of why.
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It broke the Beatles up, it can break your band up too ;)
jaykaydrums said:
When i do eventually learn to drive, i'll get a small to medium van for all my drum equipment so that if the rest want to get away quick, they can do and i'll get myself home or bring my bass player home (as he often pitches in and helps me pack away when he's unplugged and de-rigged).
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Getting your license is the best thing you'll ever do as a working musician. Don't worry about anyone else look after number 1, the cost of road tax and insurance never mind petrol/diesel in the UK is extortionate. We need that cheap stuff they run their cars on in the states called gas.

You don't need a van at all I've got an estate that's too big. I used to get everything in the back of a 3 door 1994 Vauxhall Corsa no problem when I first passed my test. That kit had a 26x20 bass drum too.
 
I was a Union Chief Steward for 20 years and have done lots of investigations over those years into many various issues.

I'd always ask tons of questions of all involved.

The first one I'd ask here is - is the part mentioned in the letter about having to wait till 130am to leave true?
 
KEEF said:
I'm currently on a self imposed month long hiatus from my band after we had words for very similar reasons. They do nothing ( and I mean NOTHING) to help with the band gear. They are straight outside after the last song to drink and smoke and socialise, so after my kit is put away and loaded I end up doing the entire pa and lightshow, right down to the very last lead, on my own. Once that's loaded I have to go get them to get in the van so I can drive them home. I let it go on for far too long before I finally snapped. I've agreed to go back - but I will be driving myself and only doing my gear and the lights (cos I run the show) and then going home and leaving the rest of the gear and the rest of the band to sort themselves out.
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Be sure to get an extra cut for providing the light engineering!...include gear rental. Leeches....its the same as being hired for temp work but being expected to roadie...guess it gives you a roster of people to avoid...
 
jaykaydrums said:
so, just had this message come through on the band chat for my main band. and its the guitarist whose posted it (him and the singer driver the band van).

my question is, are they being too unreasonable? considering all they have to do is unplug a few cables and carry their amps and pedalboards out, whereas i have to pack down all my stands, pedals, cymbals, drums, mics & cables plus put all hardware in my bag correctly (if it doesnt go in right it doesnt shut properly).

the main thing thats irked me is if people are not packed down in their given timeframe, they said theyd have to find their own way home.

i *suspect* its the singers girlfriend who has been chirping in his ear about getting home late from gigs (she has a princess complex, whereas she packs her mic and cable away and then doesnt help move anything else, jsut sits there on their phone or in the band van on their phone while everyone else moves gear).

so again, anyone else think this is being unreasonable? or am i just overthinking things? :)


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Really really bad way to communicate to band. Like really bad. Afraid to talk to everyone in person.

That being said, an hour to pack up and load in van isn't unreasonable. But gives you no time to hang out, have a beer, wind down. Sometimes I like to do that, especially if venue stays open until later.
 
Playing the devils advocate here but if it genuinely takes you longer than 1 hour to pack up I would say you might be a bit slow moving, or you have too much stuff. Also the bag thing, I like my nice bags too but if it causes delays then you could possibly look at a bigger bag, or a second duffel bag for the last few bits and pieces.
 
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May I ask, what's keeping you from getting your license?
 
BobC said:
May I ask, what's keeping you from getting your license?
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i had an eye condition (normal tenion glaucoma) for just over 10 years which the doctors and Driving authorities here in the UK said i couldnt learn to drive with, but it somehow cleared itself up with eye drops and time, now its just a case of saving the money for lessons (as theyre really expensive in the current climate). as most instructors want you to block-book with them, rather than having single lessons at a time.
 
I think most of us agree that the message was delivered poorly.

Our 5-piece bar band can be packed up and loaded, ready to go in 40 minutes. We've done it in 30 before, 40-45 is the average. That's everything, drums, amps, PA, lights... the hardest part of getting it all done quickly is having room for everyone to work without stepping on each other. Also, it can make a difference if the cases and such are stored nearby the stage, or if we had to stow them outside in the trailer, necessitating having to bring them all back in before getting everything packed up. Still, it doesn't have to take hours...

Occasionally, on local gigs where we know a lot of folks attending, and won't have a long drive home, we might take 5-10 minutes after the show to visit. But we all agree to that beforehand.
 
I'd have a band meeting and talk about what you have to do vs. everyone else. Then address the sitting in the van on the phone and not helping. If that's a reason for them to be mad, then I'm out. Life is too short to be putting up with that BS and they know it. They just want to be Gen Z'ers and do what they want.
Fook that.
 
prodigy4299 said:
Reading some of these replies has made me realize how lucky I've been in bands in the past. I never had to ask for help with packing up / carrying the drums. It was blindingly obvious that they take most of the time to set up and tear down, and everything was done as a team...
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Our band, as well. They help my lug in my stuff, and back out again. I'm also lugging speakers and everything else, too. It all needs to get in the venue, and back out again.

Of course, all of our gear goes into one band trailer, save for they keyboard players stuff. And we help him with his stuff, too.
 
BruceW said:
Our band, as well. They help my lug in my stuff, and back out again. I'm also lugging speakers and everything else, too. It all needs to get in the venue, and back out again.

Of course, all of our gear goes into one band trailer, save for they keyboard players stuff. And we help him with his stuff, too.
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yeah...I have never been in a band where people didn't help.

more often than not, I have been in bands where the members were slightly picky about others touching their stuff, so loading is usually handled pretty organized. I personally don't like people helping me tear down hardware - I have had more breakage to hardware due to someone not knowing how to undo a cymbal boom stand, or loosening the wingnuts until they fall off and go to that alternate reality plane that drum keys and socks go to

but once things are cased up, I will take all the help I can get

in my metal band we have, many times, sent our singers home after a show if we were goign to stay late and load in to the practice place later. No sense in them hanging around, and 2 of the 3 of us were/are competitive body builders, so we have the bulk.
 
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