It's alot easier to be fun enjoyable when the rest of the guys are pulling their weight, I know that.
Great point Al. I said something to a singer once, about forgetting the vocals and his inability to lead us out of Marvin Gaye's "Let's Get It On". It went on and on and on, OMG.
Lol I remember saying, "If I did my job as good as you do yours, I wouldn't have this gig". He asked me if I want to take it outside. I said, no I just want you to remember the lyrics FCS. He was a cokehead hammer. I have a history of telling off hammers.
Afterwards, my then horror of GF took his side and told me, you guys are supposed to be having fun up there.
Yea...but....
Lol.
I think it's very telling that musicians themselves have bought into the stereotype of musicians as drug-addled flakes and egotists and we get into bands pretty much expecting to get into a scrape with a bandmember at some point.
I have only once ever joined a band out of any modicum of financial necessity, and to be sure the takehome wasn't great, but it beat not eating. Having said that, it was not a fun work environment. The musicianship level was high and so were the bandleader's expectations. To be honest, I still had a lot of rough spots in my playing (and still do, but man I can tell the difference to those days when I play now). My departure was unheralded and kind of just happened when gigs were being booked that I wasn't getting told to show up to (the classic passive-aggressive firing, right?)
Contrast that with the best band I've ever been in, which was four guys committed to having fun and creating good music first, and everything else could be worked out from there. A much lower level of musicianship, but we weren't trying to be anything but ourselves. Never was an unkind word spoken between us in the years we were together. At one point very early on in our career we were asked to play a gay pride event. While none of us are or were in any way anti-gay, I was at the time in a leadership position at a church which would have made my appearance at the event a potential issue. Despite the fact that it would have been an incredible opportunity for a very new band, the other guys heard me out, and all agreed to pass on the event. I "made it up to them" by booking us two very lucrative shows elsewhere later that year. Later, after I had left the band (on good terms, relocated due to my job), they were able to book another go-round of that event, so all's well.
Conflict in bands draws a different flavor of audience than normal -- see the Kinks, Oasis, etc. for example -- and it's a flavor I don't care for. I tend to think that a band of friends makes better music and creates a better experience than a loose association of musicians who don't care for each other.
Sorry to ramble off the OP's original intent.