Going to shows of a band you got rejected from a good idea?

Shild

Member
There is a band I've tried out for twice and didn't make it. tried out 1st time on bass and 2nd on drums. I feel like I'm almost good enough and will have more chances to try out for this band in the future. My question is, do you think going to one of the bands shows would increase my chances for next time? I was thinking about sending him an email or text that says something like "Hope things are going well with you and your band, I realize you found a drummer but if anyone leaves I want another shot at it". I sent something like that after the 1st time but got no response so not so sure about doing it again.
 

larryace

"Uncle Larry"
The more interested you are in them, the better they will like you is my first thought. As long as you are not annoying of course, no dis-respect intended. I got passed over 3 times before I got a shot at the band I'm in now. Wasn't quite ready. But I kept coming to their gigs anytime I could. If you really want it, that goes a long way in the other's eyes. Attitude is everything. Definitely show up and be supportive and don't talk smack about the current drummer. On the contrary, befriend him. You want to be the first call sub. Support them whenever you can. Being in their field of vision means a lot.

It will put you in a favorable light IMO. I like seeing guys who are lucky enough to have the opportunity to really want to be in a certain band. Good for you man. Desire goes a long way. The more you see them play from out front...that's like a mental dress rehearsal for you. You get to know their stuff, and see them from angles you can't see while drumming. Invaluable. Study them. So when the time comes you slide right in without rehearsals because you know their material inside and out. Persistence definitely pays off.

I'd hold off on the email and let actions speak louder than words.
 

opentune

Platinum Member
I would go to their shows sure, but personally would never send such an email. My MO is always play it cool and not appear too anxious or desperate. But do what your heart tells you.
 

Dr_Watso

Platinum Member
I would go to their shows sure, but personally would never send such an email. My MO is always play it cool and not appear too anxious or desperate. But do what your heart tells you.
Yea. No email, yes go to shows and be seen.
 

Blisco

Senior Member
This happened to me about 4 years ago in a side project. We played about 8 shows over the course of 3-4 months and everything was going great. One day I found out the singer wanted to bring in his old drummer and I was out. What really pissed me off was that 2 other guys I had just spent 7 years playing with exclusively, did not stand up for me. I'm still kinda mad about that.

Anyways, I decided to go to the very next gig and 'eye up' the drummer that replaced me. He was serviceable at best and played for the music. Cool. I went up to him and said "hi". He knew who I was and didn't want to approach me because he thought I would hit him (he much bigger than me). Nope, just some drummer brotherly love. The singer? He's still a weenie.

Funny thing is my replacement lasted about 3 months and quit to be with family.

Me? I joined another band and haven't looked back. Last year was my personal-best year in terms of income, fun, and prestige. I got the better deal. That band is now onto their 3rd drummer since me. I found this out yesterday via Facebook LMAO!!

I say DO IT. Be cool. Be friendly. Never hold a grudge. Something unexpected may happen. Perhaps not with these guys, but somebody will get the word that you're a cool cat. I don't burn bridges (publicly) even if I am hurt by something like my friends not standing up for me. Those 2 guys have no idea I am slightly peeved at them for that.
 

GeoB

Gold Member
Funny thing is my replacement lasted about 3 months and quit to be with family.

Me? I joined another band and haven't looked back.
Funny how things work out that way, quite often indeed.

But for the OP - But Keep up the Networking. You're interested and the band will take notice. Keep up good relationships & continue to play with others as well. And who knows - Blisco's quote happens more often than not IF you're out there in pursuit of the gig!
 

No Way Jose

Silver Member
Instead of going to their gigs, how about they come to your gigs and ask to be in your band?

I auditioned for a band once. They rejected me. Since then I played about 200 gigs and they played about three.
 

mikel

Platinum Member
Move on and find or form a band that wants you as a member. Life is too short to waste it on things you cant control.
 

eclipseownzu

Gold Member
I am going to assume that you like, and obviously know, their music. With that in mind go check out the show. There might be other bands on the bill that you can network with as well. I go to a ton of local shows, some of the bands have guys that I have played with, to me its all about supporting local music.

I auditioned for a band one time that ultimately chose another guy. I joined a different band and ended up playing a bunch of shows with the band that didn't choose me. We became pretty good friends and hung out quite a bit. Life is all about networking and taking advantage of opportunities. I would go to the show, be cool about it and use it as a chance to further your network.
 

larryace

"Uncle Larry"
The big takeaway I'm getting is to not harbor anything negative. Let it roll off you like water from a ducks back. It's simply not in your best interest to be negative. The mature person gladly accepts whatever befalls them and still continues to support the band. (if you want to be in it that bad) The people you come across in your scene...you will be seeing these same people many years from now and way farther down the road. Your attitude from past encounters is what will be remembered the most. The high road is usually the best way to travel.
 

Hollywood Jim

Platinum Member
Your attitude from past encounters is what will be remembered the most. The high road is usually the best way to travel.

Larry is right on here.
Musicians are members of a community.
We constantly meet each other, we talk about each other and we connect with each other. Then we dis-connect with each other and we re-connect over and over again.

People will forget what you say. People will usually forget what you do.
But people will always remember how you made them feel.

.
 

maxwhineberg

Junior Member
I would go to their shows sure, but personally would never send such an email. My MO is always play it cool and not appear too anxious or desperate. But do what your heart tells you.
I second this.

Play it cool. I auditioned for a band once that I really wanted to be in. They had a record and a tour and I was a fan but the audition was disastrous. Poor planning on my part. I was young and nervous and didn't wasn't ready. They offered to keep me in mind for other band referrals down the road and complimented my playing but I never asked for another audition. It was a humbling experience and embarrassing and I learned a lot that day.

I still see some of the guys and we keep in touch but I never bug them, I play it cool. If they are ever in a pinch down the road and need a drummer, I'm ready now and they know it. But I wouldn't bother them about it.
 

Skitch

Pioneer Member
The more interested you are in them, the better they will like you is my first thought. As long as you are not annoying of course, no dis-respect intended. I got passed over 3 times before I got a shot at the band I'm in now. Wasn't quite ready. But I kept coming to their gigs anytime I could. If you really want it, that goes a long way in the other's eyes. Attitude is everything. Definitely show up and be supportive and don't talk smack about the current drummer. On the contrary, befriend him. You want to be the first call sub. Support them whenever you can. Being in their field of vision means a lot.

It will put you in a favorable light IMO. I like seeing guys who are lucky enough to have the opportunity to really want to be in a certain band. Good for you man. Desire goes a long way. The more you see them play from out front...that's like a mental dress rehearsal for you. You get to know their stuff, and see them from angles you can't see while drumming. Invaluable. Study them. So when the time comes you slide right in without rehearsals because you know their material inside and out. Persistence definitely pays off.

I'd hold off on the email and let actions speak louder than words.
I would say that this would be the ideal approach for most circumstances as it is the Jeff Porcaro thing to do and you might learn something from going. Don't go to remind them that you are still out there and wanting to be in their band. However, there are some bands in which the leader enjoys all of the power so much that his national pastime is firing people.

What I mean by the Jeff Porcaro thing is that Jeff was essentially snubbed for a Steely Dan album, I forget which one - maybe the Royal Scam. Jeff had already proven himself to Walter and Donald and was ready to play on the next album when Donald asked him if they could use his drums. Jeff agreed thinking that the next session was right around the corner. Time passed and the album was completed without Jeff playing a single note.

Did Jeff get mad? Not according to Jim Keltner as Keltner stated that Jeff "went home and studied the sucker trying to dissect it and find out what it was Don and Walter wanted."

That's why you should go.

Mike

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