So sorry. Hopefully you can take comfort in knowing that everyone goes through this. Unless you're a robot, it friggin stings, right? We learn from the negative more than the positive. We all want to avoid these things. It's clear you didn't want this at all.
But....
Know that sometimes...the stage has to be cleared for the next chapter in your life. You don't know the bigger plan, so try and let go. Definitely reflect on it, but absolutely roll with it. You're getting your health back. There's a reason this happened that you don't know about yet, I can guarantee it.
You did nothing wrong. I promise.
I repeat, you did nothing wrong, I promise.
This happened for a reason, that's all. You did nothing wrong. Unless being yourself is wrong which it isn't. You are a good and decent person, we all know that here. So just look forward to what's coming up. It's an unexpected twist in your life, that's all. Approach it with bravery.
I have a great personal story about when seemingly bad things happen, and how they can actually turn out to be blessings in disguise that may give you some hope...
It was 1998, and the house I own now, I initially rented with my HS sweetheart and her 4 kids. I was still legally married at the time to my first wife, but obviously separated. Anyway, the water well in rented house...it ran dry. So the landlord had to drill a new one. The water from the newly dug well was so full of iron, it ruined all our clothes, and after only a few months, unbeknownst to me, it formed a rogue electrical pathway in the dishwasher and caught it, and then the kitchen, on fire while the house was empty one summer day. The A/C was on and the windows were closed.
The house was saved by an anomaly, an aunt who miraculously happened by, just in time to save the house by calling the fire company. Fifteen more minutes and nearby windows would have broke, and the fire would have gone wild from the fresh air source. After the flames were extinguished, the house had major smoke and water damage throughout.
We had to share a 2 bedroom apartment with 6 people while the rental house got fixed. It was the worst 2 months of my life.
Bad stuff, right?
The silver lining came months later after we moved back in...in the form of my then brother in law, who is an insurance public adjuster. He somehow got me $10,000 dollars, from some rental clause in the policy on my marital home that I was still paying on! I used that ten grand as the down payment on the now repaired house that caught on fire (landlord was begging me to buy from jump street) Looking back, it was the very best thing that could have happened to me, that fire. I never would have been able to save 10 grand with a mortgage and a rental house lol. I'm still in the "rented" house and absolutely love the location where I live. As a drummer, it's perfect for me in every way. Even the cul-de-sac I live on is named Lawrence Circle, I kid you not.
So bad events very well can turn out to be blessings in disguise. This is what's happening to you I'll bet.
A quick little related side story to hopefully cheer you up and warm your heart...the day before the fire...the gal I was with had a parakeet. I really detest seeing birds in cages, like in a major way. I was alone in the house that day before the fire, and it was beautiful out, so I took the birdcage outside so the little guy could get some fresh air and sunshine for once. I had never done that before, he was never outside before. Well it was a real cheapo birdcage and oops, the wind ended up blowing it over and Pete the Parakeet flew away. I was SO in the doghouse from EVERYONE in the house for causing that to happen that night. The next day, the fire happened.
If I didn't take Pete outside the day before that fateful fire, he would have certainly died a horrible, inescapable, smoky, high temperature death.
As it happened Pete the Parakeet got at least one beautiful day of freedom. I'll take being in the doghouse for that any day.
Bigger plans, that are completely outside of your control and knowledge...absolutely exist. If it happens, if it actually comes to pass...then it was meant to be. Why fight or beat yourself up over what's meant to be?
Roll with this, everything is gonna be great.