I've used the Alesis DM10 in the past and it's a great starter set. Fairly big with all the options, but having played a Roland V-drum (can't remember the type) and a Yamaha DTX-treme III in a shop once i must say the only thing that comes near the real feel are those expensive ones.
I never got used to the small kick tower on mu DM10, the small snare and the small toms. Also the hi-hat trigger feels weird to me, but it does improve greatly if you use a Goedrum trigger on a real hi-hat setup (some DIY action needed there).
The only downside is that those high-end rolands are so expensive, otherwise i would have gotten one years ago.
Was almost about to get the Alesis Strike Pro, but eventually didn't do that and converted an acoustic kit to an electric kit (and used the DM10 module as a trigger I/O hooked on to my computer which ran Superior Drummer 3).
But from what I've read here and on other forums, Roland takes the lead and sounds the most organic.