Hi,
Generally speaking, for rock music the most recommended head combination for toms around here is a 2-ply batter (such as the Remo Emperor, Aquarian Super-2, or Evans G2) and a 1-ply resonant (bottom) head (Remo Ambassador or Evans G1). Clear batter heads seem to offer slightly more attack, while coated heads give a warmer sound. Resonant heads are usually clear. If you want a little more control on your tom sound you might try Remo Pinstripe or Evans EC2 batters, although some think that those heads reduce projection and make the drums sound too thuddy.
For snares and bass drums, you have a lot of choices that will all serve you equally well. Popular choices for snare include Remo's Ambassador, Ambassador X, Emperor, and Emperor X; Evans' G1 and G2, Power Center, Power Center Reverse, and G-Plus Frosted. For bass, Remo's Powerstroke heads and Evans' EMAD and EQ series seem very popular. But this list is neither all-inclusive nor meant to be a limit on what to choose; many drummers use other heads to get a unique sound that still works fr the music they play.
There is no correct answer for drumsticks. The sticks have to feel good in your hands (i.e. noto too thick, not too thin) or it will lead to hand and arm fatigue. Sticks that are too thin will break; sticks that may be too large for your style will be difficult to control. It's trial and error, unfortunately, and my own search for my ideal drumstick has taken 25 years - - and I'm not convinced it's over yet!
Choosing the right heads for your sound can be a very long process and involves learning how to tune each drum correctly and strike it correctly in order to get a great sound out of it. For this, a good teacher and a knowledgeable drum store employee can become your best tools. And of course, you've got the internet in front of you to research and explore. Good luck, and have fun!