Beginning drumming...were you supported or not supported

Bozozoid

Well-known member
Well?..my mother purchased my first drumset at 17 for a Christmas present. At 350 bucks it was a stretch for her financial limits. She sacrificed for it and hoped I'd remain interested. I don't think she realized just how remained I would be. It was her hard earned gift to her son yet I believe it took her by surprise just how devoted I would be. I forsook everything which I believe eventually concerned her. SO..i was supported but support is one thing but devotion?..she never realized.
 

Cru Drums

Active member
Well?..my mother purchased my first drumset at 17 for a Christmas present. At 350 bucks it was a stretch for her financial limits. She sacrificed for it and hoped I'd remain interested. I don't think she realized just how remained I would be. It was her hard earned gift to her son yet I believe it took her by surprise just how devoted I would be. I forsook everything which I believe eventually concerned her. SO..i was supported but support is one thing but devotion?..she never realized.
My first set was a $99 special then a $400 all-in-one set. My parents spend a lot on my current kit but I am expected to have my head on straight with school and volunteer work. If I were a 2.0 student I doubt I would get a 5k drum set, maybe a 2nd $99 kit. :)
 

Sakae2xBopster

Well-known member
With three kids playing in high school (trombone, drums, trumpet) my parents did ten straight years of band boosters. I'm still impressed by that. They delivered A LOT of hoagies.
 

Xstr8edgtnrdrmrX

Well-known member
I was super lucky...

my dad was a drummer around town, and was my first teacher at. age 3-4.

Moms whole family were professional musicians - 7 brothers and a sister, including my mom - so I had all kinds of support/pressure there. On that side everyone could play piano...well. There was a french horn player; mom played sax and sang; my aunt sang; one uncle was a bass player (he also inspired me to pick up bass in 7th grade); the other brother played piano, and ended up playing on tour with Jesus Christ, Superstar in the 70's; oldest uncle plays accordion, harmonica, and has a collection of a bunch of weird "found" instruments

my house was where our rock band in HS practiced, and it was the hub of all of our lives; we had a regular living room, and then a parlor, and the parlor became the practice space. Dad, soundproofed the room, installed air conditioners in the window (this was pre central air....mid 80's) and even reinforced the floor in the basement under where the drum set was. Our house was always known as "the place where the door is always open". My parents loved it, and as some have mentioned, I think they also loved it b/c they always knew where we were, and that we were not getting in trouble.

On fall weekends, we would do marching band on Friday nights, come over to my house and sleep in the attic, which was fixed up and my room. Wake up around 10 or 11 and practice for 8-10hours on Saturday...friends in and out of the house all day watching. We ALWAYS ended up at White Castles after practice, and then it was back to the house for darts, pool, listening to music, watching movies on laser disc...on other Fridays, we would usually try. to sneak into shows at bars, or go to house party shows to see other friends bands play

That was our life for the 4 years of HS....irreplaceable memories. All 4 of us in that band still live close, and still are the best of friends.

none of that could have happened with out my mom and dad
 

Cru Drums

Active member
I was super lucky...

my dad was a drummer around town, and was my first teacher at. age 3-4.

Moms whole family were professional musicians - 7 brothers and a sister, including my mom - so I had all kinds of support/pressure there. On that side everyone could play piano...well. There was a french horn player; mom played sax and sang; my aunt sang; one uncle was a bass player (he also inspired me to pick up bass in 7th grade); the other brother played piano, and ended up playing on tour with Jesus Christ, Superstar in the 70's; oldest uncle plays accordion, harmonica, and has a collection of a bunch of weird "found" instruments

my house was where our rock band in HS practiced, and it was the hub of all of our lives; we had a regular living room, and then a parlor, and the parlor became the practice space. Dad, soundproofed the room, installed air conditioners in the window (this was pre central air....mid 80's) and even reinforced the floor in the basement under where the drum set was. Our house was always known as "the place where the door is always open". My parents loved it, and as some have mentioned, I think they also loved it b/c they always knew where we were, and that we were not getting in trouble.

On fall weekends, we would do marching band on Friday nights, come over to my house and sleep in the attic, which was fixed up and my room. Wake up around 10 or 11 and practice for 8-10hours on Saturday...friends in and out of the house all day watching. We ALWAYS ended up at White Castles after practice, and then it was back to the house for darts, pool, listening to music, watching movies on laser disc...on other Fridays, we would usually try. to sneak into shows at bars, or go to house party shows to see other friends bands play

That was our life for the 4 years of HS....irreplaceable memories. All 4 of us in that band still live close, and still are the best of friends.

none of that could have happened with out my mom and dad
Awesome story! I'm still working on "lakeside Park", I want to play it well enough for my age to give it justice, but man...Neil Peart is just really hard to play well to.
 

Rock Salad

Junior Member
I consider it supportive that my parents were not actively against my playing. They also never asked how I acquired the instruments I got hold of surprisingly, as they would have had any other things appeared in the house.
My Mom eventually came around and has come to see me play in a couple of bands over the years. My Dad (R.I.P.) never did come around to be interested, but like I mentioned, never actively discouraged me. I am grateful for the both of them and their patience and acceptance.
 

Someone's Dad

Senior Member
Supporting kids to learn the drums is easier than ever before with all the quietened cymbals and practice solutions that are available, but only if you have disposable income - this stuff is expensive! Wanting to support kids is one thing, knowing how to support them is another. Getting the right teacher seems vital. We bought my son a Pearl Rhythm Traveller at the age of seven, but he didn't do anything with it for five years until he went to secondary school and got lessons (and the Zildjian low volume cymbals that allowed him to practice for hours at a time). I'd always said that no child ever learned to play the drums without a drum kit (and I admit that's clearly not true), but buying the drum kit is just the start. There will always be drummers who can get there without support, but having someone to foster and channel your enthusiasm has got to be a huge advantage.
 

GetAgrippa

Platinum Member
One of my Grandfather's was a lunatic and biggest a-hole on earth (I've mentioned him before sadly). Anyways he had 3 sons who he supported in everything and 3 daughters he didn't support In anything-no women should go to college, just shut up and have babies. Now all 3 did go to college, probably just to spite the SOB ,so sometimes hardship drives people to excel too. Sometimes coddling can backfire and quench desire , and the sometimes the fire of hardship drives people on. It's hard to figure.
 

CommanderRoss

Silver Member
My dad got me my first Remo practice pad & sticks. He knew I was always beating on things & thought this was a good way for me to let that out.
He wasn’t the first to get me a set though, I did that. 16 years old, working at McDeez to save enough for that used Royce kit at my local shop.
I look back on that & feel better about it than if he had just bought it.

He even let me set it up in the living room & as long as I didn’t play while he was home, it was all good.

He was always supportive at my shows to. Filmed them all.
 

rhumbagirl

Senior Member
but having someone to foster and channel your enthusiasm has got to be a huge advantage.
Definitely. Had my parents been the type to get involved in their kids' career paths, we all would have had more successful careers. If my parents had told me I needed to keep my grades up to get into a better college, or even Berklee, I would have been more focused on that. Instead they just let us all go in whatever direction we wanted, even if it was a perpetual eddy.

But kids today, while they have the information super-highway at their disposal, they don't get enough exercise, don't eat right, and have way too many distractions to stay focused in any particular area long enough.
 

Ransan

Senior Member
We support our daughter’s music interest both my wife and I. She has a console piano as well as a smaller electronic Yamaha.

I tell my daughter she never has to ask to play my drums and is always green lighted, though she very seldom does, more so. Younger I would prod her to play them cause I want her to pick them up through her life, she’s almost 18 so I don’t force the issue now.

I have been supported by my parents.
Dad was and still is very interested in my drumming endeavors. He brought me my first drums cb700 with 2 16” MX cymbals, and would listen to me play songs on a large console stereo.

Mom was indifferent and didn’t care as long as I wasn’t getting into trouble.

Now my dad sees my gear and is like ‘we made it!’

When my mom saw just my Vistalites for the first time she replied, “that’s a lot of drums you need to give some of those away.” 😳😂
 
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Jasta 11

Well-known member
Supported, my mom surprised me one day by telling me she signed me up for drum lessons and the first one was that night. She had seen me tapping my fingers on tables etc but i never mentioned that I wanted lessons or even a kit. They bought me my first pad and stand that week. Then a few months later my first kit. She is one of my bands biggest supporters too, she tries to make every show.
 

Dr_Watso

Platinum Member
Parents were perfectly supporting in my urge to make music or really any type of art for that matter as long as I actually practiced and showed improvement they always paid for things like guitar lessons. I did buy a drumset before I moved out but it always lived at my childhood band's practice garage so parents never saw it.

Art is how we decorate the world around us and it's so important to our minds and society.
 
Music and musical instrument playing were always fully supported for me and my 4 siblings although choice of both was sometimes not in full agreement among among all of us , but nevertheless fully encouraged to listen to and play an instrument. We all sang and played instruments in school and in church.All 7 of us in the house played at least 2 instruments.

Music and playing an instrument were strongly recommended growing up in my house and I’m thankful for that as I know that’s many times not the case.

I did wonder if I made the right decision switching from woodwinds to drums
( between age 11-4 when I was playing both) because at 15 it was no fun being woken up at 6 am by dad when he came home from work hitting a cymbal next to my head because the garbage hadn’t gone out and the truck already came lol 😂.
The consequences of being raised by a Brooklyn born Italian who was pretty big on discipline and in all fairness to the old man , had warned and spoken to me about it countless times before . I never did it again and still play the drums lol !
 
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Vapor Trail

Junior Member
I wasn't supported. I told my parents I wanted to play drums (had already been bashing on pillows with chopsticks to records).

In response, my dad brought home an acoustic guitar and tells me I should play that.

I proceeded to "play" the strings and frets percussively with the chopsticks....
 

ZenR1

Well-known member
My parents were supportive, although I initially took accordion lessons. 😮
I took accordian lessons too. After a couple years, I told my parents that I don't really like accordian. I told them I wanted to play drums and it was a non-starter, unfortunately. Sucks for me.
 
I started in elementary school on violin, none of my parents were musicians, and if you've ever heard a kid play a violin it fills the house with screechy noises and bad rythm haha. I was encouraged to switch to flute which turned out to be even worse ...

After time passed, I started playing percussion in the orchestra, and then one day my grandmother bought me one of those walmart First-Act drumsets with her pention check. She was my only fan, but she also didn't have to live in our house! I'm sure she was just trying to get back at my dad for the pain he caused her growing up.

My dad came around to it years later after I started playing in a full sized orchestra and brought home my first $200 for a two night performance. When I got to college he came to every home football game. He is to this day a huge fan of marching bands and tells me he regrets never playing music. He loves DCI, HBCU's, and Midwest bands like Ohio State especially ... when they came to town he was so excited.
 
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pgm554

Platinum Member
My dad tried to discourage me as much as possible.
I literally used to hide my drumsticks so he didn't know I was practicing.
I got good enough to get accepted to WVU school of music ,but it was no go as I couldn't afford the tuition by myself.
I ended up at a regular college and got a degree in polisci.
 
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