Womens love cowbells 2019

Larry

"Uncle Larry"
Friday night as I was starting to break down my set, a young female drummer inquired about my drums and how she never saw a drumset like that before and could she sit behind it? OK sure. So she does and points down and says "this my my favorite part of the kit". Naturally she was pointing to the cowbell. Confirmation.

So in case any of you were not quite sure, I had proof positive on Friday night.

I record all my gigs and about 5 years ago while listening back to a wedding gig, I heard some dialog between two of the female attendees, and the one woman told the other woman...(in a glowing way)..."and the drummer has a cowbell!

If you don't use a cowbell on your set...you are losing out ha ha.
 
Wow sounds like you have made a major discovery. What kind of cowbell do you recommend?
 
Whenever I play my kit, the only mention about it when I'm done from my wife is about the cowbell or tambourine. Same thing with my kid. They love that thing. Actually, my wife bought me the cowbell and tambourine. I think you are on to something Uncle Larry.
 
Well, it's either that or they got their only drum education from thois.

 
Wow sounds like you have made a major discovery. What kind of cowbell do you recommend?

One that's not on a cow.

I'm not sure it matters. It's just gotta be a cowbell. Don't complicate it.

Does size count???

No. Small ones get the job done as well as the larger ones. Just don't be insecure about it and everything will be great.

Whenever I play my kit, the only mention about it when I'm done from my wife is about the cowbell or tambourine. Same thing with my kid. They love that thing. Actually, my wife bought me the cowbell and tambourine. I think you are on to something Uncle Larry.

Actually, this is not a new thing. It's an established fact that dates back to last century at least. I am just offering the latest evidence of it's power over the female gender. It really is a thing.
 
You can thank, in part, Saturday Night Live and its iconic cowbell skit for making the cowbell infamous.
 
I thought the cowbell reminds them of dairy which reminds them of breastfeeding which reminds them of child rearing.
Recent scientific discoveries have discovered the portion of the brain that responds to cowbells. And guess what? That part of the brain also triggers the female of our species to want to have sex. The player of the cowbell is usually the intended target but not necessarily. Curiously, it has little effect on the male of the species, other than the need to exploit this fact for my own disgusting purposes lol.
 
Larry:

You are absolutely correct about this. I have seen lots of evidence of it. When I add the cowbell to a song I see the ladies smile and wave at me.
And my male guitar player hates the cowbell. His wife loves it.

.
 
Should we moo as well?
No, definitely don't moo. Forget about mooing, OK? Don't complicate things. It's easy. Get a cowbell and play it, and keep your mouth shut lest you ruin things. If you enjoy the whole act of cowbelling, why it's even more effective.
 
I can only imagine the possibilities...
 

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Guys guys guys...you don't need 50 cowbells OK? One will do. Why do we complicate things SO much?

I'll try again. Get a cowbell, and use it in a song. Keep it steady, don't get creative lolo.

In and out, nobody gets hurt.

You guys slay me.
 
Oh yeah, case in point, my brother and I were playing in a reunion band-my eldest bros reunion. He grabbed the cowbell and was like the Pied Piper all the women gathered around him-leaving their husbands standing in the dance floor while they danced around him-it was hilarious.
 

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There must be a way I can profit from this in some fashion.

A cowbell ringtone. No wait.

Well I can't say the one I'm thinking of here but it's pretty funny..

How about a...........No, that would violate a rule too...

OK I got it.

Crap! I can't say that either.

I have to say, one of my most favorite of all kowbell tones is the tone of Don Brewer's kowbell in, We're an American Band".

I'd pay a hundred dollars for that.
 
I have enough spawn and am done getting used by women. No more cowbells! I have removed the last one from my kit and am finally free from the hoards of hotties. gah! It's disgusting! Have you ever noticed how they sit at a drum kit, kinda wiggle their hips around the snare, tap the cowbell then look up at you with those doe eyes and ask, "What's this do?" It's a trick! Run for your life!
 
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