So a C, an E flat and a G walk into a bar......

[cdrums21]

The bartender says, "sorry, but we don't serve minors." So E-flat leaves, and C and G have an open fifth between them. After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished and G is out flat. F comes in and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough.

A D comes in and heads for the bathroom saying, "Excuse me. I'll just be a second." Then A comes in, but the bartender is not convinced that this relative of C is not a minor. Then the bartender notices B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and says, "Get out! You're the seventh minor I've found in this bar tonight."

E-Flat comes back the next night in a three-piece suit with nicely shined shoes. The bartender says, "you're looking sharp tonight. Come on in, this could be a major development." Sure enough, E-flat soon takes off his suit and everything else, and is au natural.

Eventually, C, who had passed out under the bar the night before, begins to sober up and realizes in horror that he's under a rest. So, C goes to trial, is convicted of contributing to the diminution of a minor and sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an up scale correctional facility.

The conviction is overturned on appeal, however, and C is found innocent of any wrongdoing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the contrary are bassless. The bartender decides, however, that since he's only had tenor so patrons, the soprano out in the bathroom and everything has become alto much treble, he needs a rest and closes the bar.

[aydee]

Cheers Clint, thanks,I needed that after many days of grimness on this forum!!! : )

...

[EvansSpecialist]

Can't remember the last time I saw a music theory joke on a drummer forum! Thanks for posting this.

[Fuo]

I don't really understand much of that... but epic nonetheless.

[Ian Williams]

Thanks man! good forum routine break.

[Ethan01]

(Sorry to those who've heard of this!)

What's the difference between a Blues musician and a Jazz musician? A Jazz musician plays 1000 chords to 5 people.... (you can figure out the next line =P )

[LukeSnyder]

I love music jokes! And drummer jokes. What do you call a drummer with two brain cells? Pregnant.

[Bo Eder]

That's a great joke! Thanks for posting a good break-up in the routine.

So, what's the difference between a sax player and a frog squashed in the middle of the street?
The frog was on his way to a gig!

What's the difference between a trombone player and a large pepperoni pizza?
The pizza can feed a family of four!

Ba dum pum!

[Ian Williams]

The dying man took to his bed to await the Grim Reaper.......;-]

Originally Posted by aydee

Cheers Clint, thanks,I needed that after many days of grimness on this forum!!! : )

...

[caddywumpus]

Here's an oldie but goodie:

The four bass players in the symphony orchestra are talking before they play Beethoven's 9th Symphony that evening.

"We don't play until the last movement." one of them says, "We should go get some drinks across the street until it's time for us to go back and play". So, they make their way across the street to the local tavern. After a few drinks, they start getting tipsy, and one of them passes out.

"Oh no!" says the principal bass player, "What do we do now? We have to go back!"

"I've bought us some time before we left," says one of them, stumbling around. "Before the concert, I tied a string around the last page of the 3rd movement, so the conductor will have to untie it before moving on to the fourth movement." At that moment, HE passes out. Meanwhile, across the street, the conductor has just noticed the string tied around the bottom of his music, and starts to slow the orchestra down with his one conducting hand while feverishly trying to untie the string with his other.

Then, the principal bass player realizes that his situation is suddenly very stressful: It's the bottom of the 9th, the score is tied, and the basses are loaded with 2 out.

[Migaluch]

Originally Posted by caddywumpus

Here's an oldie but goodie:

The four bass players in the symphony orchestra are talking before they play Beethoven's 9th Symphony that evening.

"We don't play until the last movement." one of them says, "We should go get some drinks across the street until it's time for us to go back and play". So, they make their way across the street to the local tavern. After a few drinks, they start getting tipsy, and one of them passes out.

"Oh no!" says the principal bass player, "What do we do now? We have to go back!"

"I've bought us some time before we left," says one of them, stumbling around. "Before the concert, I tied a string around the last page of the 3rd movement, so the conductor will have to untie it before moving on to the fourth movement." At that moment, HE passes out. Meanwhile, across the street, the conductor has just noticed the string tied around the bottom of his music, and starts to slow the orchestra down with his one conducting hand while feverishly trying to untie the string with his other.

Then, the principal bass player realizes that his situation is suddenly very stressful: It's the bottom of the 9th, the score is tied, and the basses are loaded with 2 out.

Haha i think this one wins! I like its tie into baseball lol.

[bobdadruma]

My piano lessons are kicking in. I actually got it!

[Coldhardsteel]

I can't tell if these jokes were masterful pieces of awesome, or horrid puns that made me lose respect for those who posted them.

Oh well. They were worth a chuckle.

[DrumEatDrum]

Originally Posted by caddywumpus

Here's an oldie but goodie:

The four bass players in the symphony orchestra are talking before they play Beethoven's 9th Symphony that evening.

"We don't play until the last movement." one of them says, "We should go get some drinks across the street until it's time for us to go back and play". So, they make their way across the street to the local tavern. After a few drinks, they start getting tipsy, and one of them passes out.

"Oh no!" says the principal bass player, "What do we do now? We have to go back!"

"I've bought us some time before we left," says one of them, stumbling around. "Before the concert, I tied a string around the last page of the 3rd movement, so the conductor will have to untie it before moving on to the fourth movement." At that moment, HE passes out. Meanwhile, across the street, the conductor has just noticed the string tied around the bottom of his music, and starts to slow the orchestra down with his one conducting hand while feverishly trying to untie the string with his other.

Then, the principal bass player realizes that his situation is suddenly very stressful: It's the bottom of the 9th, the score is tied, and the basses are loaded with 2 out.

Pure awesome Caddy!!!

[Bruce M. Thomson]

Love it. reminds of 10cc; Yours is much more elaborate.

I bought a flat
Diminished responsibility
You're de ninth person to see
To be suspended in a seventh
Major catastrophe
It's a minor point but gee
Augmented by the sharpness of your
See what I'm going through
A to be with you
In a flat by the sea