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  #1  
Old 01-31-2018, 09:12 PM
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Default Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Ok, I'll try to keep this short:
My girlfriend recently fired the rest of her band (for being jerks and all around hard to work with even though it's HER name on the bill). She hired me on drums and my friend and the guitar player in MY band as the replacement. I didn't necessarily take it as we are the new full time official band, just more like temporary fill ins until she can get personnel that'll be available to tour and commit to the gig (I'd have trouble doing it because I'm scared to leave my 9-5, which I mentioned in another post).

Anyway, guitar player seems to be hemming and hawing about rehearsal times. We've cancelled obligations in order to accommodate him and his schedule, which she was irritated about, but let slide at the time.

Well, tonight a rehearsal was called to prepare for an important gig, the Winter Blues Fest in Iowa. One issue with him is the promoters got free hotel rooms for that gig, but instead of staying with us and sharing a room, he wanted to get a separate room for him and his gal, which I was bothered a bit by just as a "courtesy" issue, but she see's it as an unwillingness on his part to adjust to a touring lifestyle.

Then, well called a rehearsal tonight, which hey, if your'e into and excited about the gig you should want to practice and prepare as much as possible right? Well, he asked that we do another day this week that's convenient for HIM so that he can attend a local blues jam (the bar is shutting that jam down so he really really wanted to attend the last one, even though he's been a couple times this month already.

So my question is, does this indicate a lack of professional attitude on this gig? I mean, the person who is employing him is calling for a rehearsal and his response is to ask his EMPLOYER to accommodate HIM so that he can go to a jam sesh and cozy up to his heroes. I've gone to some lengths to defend the guy, but even my patience is running out now. If we didn't have an important gig coming up, that would be one thing. But I feel his priorities are not where they should be.
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Old 01-31-2018, 09:28 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Is he this way towards YOUR band, or his he only this way about this gig? If its specific to this gig, then just cut him loose on this one and get someone else. No hard feelings about it. Just let him know that the scheduling of this project just isn't working out with his schedule and its okay for him to do his thing and you guys will do yours. As long as he is good with YOUR band then he's probably a dependable band mate, but he probably stretched himself a bit thin adding this project as what he, probably, believes is as a favor or as a "for fun" kind of thing.
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Old 01-31-2018, 09:41 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

geez, you have a girlfriend who is talented enough to tour, but you want to stay with this loser guitarist and a 9-5 job. If I could wave a magic wand, I'd get a new guitarist for your gal's band (help her audition them, too) and sign on as the permanent drummer, drop your 9-5 job and get serious about your art and craft by touring in a band that gets booked around the state/region/country.

Do you really want to be laying on your death bed wishing you'd taken this chance but never did? Is your 9-5 that good? Is your girlfriend actually Satan's henchman? What's the catch here? Fear?

Short answer: lose the guitarist. He'll only be a bigger problem in the future.
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Old 01-31-2018, 09:44 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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Originally Posted by Tommy_D View Post
Is he this way towards YOUR band, or his he only this way about this gig? If its specific to this gig, then just cut him loose on this one and get someone else. No hard feelings about it. Just let him know that the scheduling of this project just isn't working out with his schedule and its okay for him to do his thing and you guys will do yours. As long as he is good with YOUR band then he's probably a dependable band mate, but he probably stretched himself a bit thin adding this project as what he, probably, believes is as a favor or as a "for fun" kind of thing.
I'm down with this 100%. If he's working out for YOUR band, then he's living up to what he signed on to do.
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Old 01-31-2018, 10:08 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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I'm down with this 100%. If he's working out for YOUR band, then he's living up to what he signed on to do.
Yeah, I guess he may be stretched thin. I don't to ding him too hard in OUR band, since we all have times where we do that. He does rehearse with another gal for an acoustic duo act, but I don't really know what they're wanting to do or how far they want to go.

Yeah, my girl's career is on the rise, for sure. She's already got a bunch of festival dates and a small southwest tour booked.

Having the ear of someone in her position is a big education for me, and I've learned a lot. Truth be told, I'm still mulling over making the jump to music full time. Money is the main issue. Like, is this going to bring in what we need to survive and pursue this full time? I'm not opposed to side gigs, lessons, etc, but we have some life goals we want to meet and it would be hard to do without me having a 9-5. THis is a discussion we've had pretty frequently, and I understand fully that at some point, unless I've committed to the "life" totally, she'll do what she needs to do and find another drummer. I'm happy to support her as much as I can.

The guitar player though, egh, just don't know about him. He's basically looking a gift horse in the mouth (and so am I, I guess). He's choosing to eschew her for jamming. This blues festival would significantly raise his profile and get his name out there. So, like I was telling her earlier, he either doesn't realize what an opportunity this is for him, OR he doesn't think it's much of an opportunity at all. Either way, he just doesn't seem to be the guy. Maybe he's just got the noobie ignorance, I know I have that at times. And maybe it's just my hopes not being met. I was thrilled when she asked the two of us to do the gig, me and my buddy in an up and coming artist band, felt like this was a big jump up from where we both were a year or two ago.
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Old 01-31-2018, 10:43 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

If he is cancelling on your rehearsals just so he can do other things, this is not a priority with him. He does NOT want to be there. If he did, he would do everything he could to be there.

If he wants a room of his own for that festival gig, tell him to contact the hotel and book it and pay for it himself.
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Old 01-31-2018, 11:00 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

I don't know...there is still a lot to this whole discussion that is leaving me scratching my head...not so sure there isn't maybe...just a little...over-hype going on, and the "fired her WHOLE band" thing is a red flag for me honestly. Statements like-"it's HER name on the bill" are also usually indicative of a more than meets the eye situation....

One small question, just to clarify... When you say "well called a rehearsal tonight, which hey, if you're into and excited about the gig you should want to practice and prepare as much as possible right?" How much lead time was there? It almost sounds like you called the guy up this afternoon, or maybe yesterday and sprung this on him. Not saying it would change your view of his level of commitment either way but...

Certainly if she is as good as you say, and on the way up, you she should have people knocking her door down to get in on the action. It also seems she is experienced at firing people (lol), so I don't see a problem, if the cat isn't meeting her expectations, then "off with his head!"
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Old 01-31-2018, 11:11 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Myself, I don't see a problem with asking if there was another night to rehearse, as there was something that he'd like to do that night.

The key here is if he didn't follow that up by saying "if there isn't a way to switch it out, that's fine too..." well, that is a problem.

Good luck with it!
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Old 02-01-2018, 12:44 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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Originally Posted by incrementalg View Post
I'm down with this 100%. If he's working out for YOUR band, then he's living up to what he signed on to do.
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Originally Posted by Mongrel View Post
I don't know...there is still a lot to this whole discussion that is leaving me scratching my head...not so sure there isn't maybe...just a little...over-hype going on, and the "fired her WHOLE band" thing is a red flag for me honestly. Statements like-"it's HER name on the bill" are also usually indicative of a more than meets the eye situation....

One small question, just to clarify... When you say "well called a rehearsal tonight, which hey, if you're into and excited about the gig you should want to practice and prepare as much as possible right?" How much lead time was there? It almost sounds like you called the guy up this afternoon, or maybe yesterday and sprung this on him. Not saying it would change your view of his level of commitment either way but...

Certainly if she is as good as you say, and on the way up, you she should have people knocking her door down to get in on the action. It also seems she is experienced at firing people (lol), so I don't see a problem, if the cat isn't meeting her expectations, then "off with his head!"
Well, put it this way, I'd been around her and the guys she just fired enough to see the problem. They had it coming, trust me on this. Talented dudes, but just didn't have a good attitude.

As far as my buddy and the schedule goes, we all agreed we needed to get together this week. Yeah, we asked about tonight earlier today, but I guess I just see it as a priority. Non-paying jam sesh were you'll probably get three songs to play or prepare for a gig that's going to open more doors for you. At first I thought she was being a bit harsh too, but now after so many times of shuffling things to be on HIS terms, I'm starting to agree with her. Enough is enough, she's the employer throwing HIM the opportunity.
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Old 02-01-2018, 12:46 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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Originally Posted by PorkPieGuy View Post
If he is cancelling on your rehearsals just so he can do other things, this is not a priority with him. He does NOT want to be there. If he did, he would do everything he could to be there.

If he wants a room of his own for that festival gig, tell him to contact the hotel and book it and pay for it himself.
Sigh. I'm afraid you're correct on this. I suppose I was hoping for a resolution. Maybe a "Come to Jesus" meeting between him and my girlfriend. But I feel that time has passed. Shame, I was looking forward to the two of us being in her band together. We'd been a fan of hers for a long time and were both grateful for the chance to work with her.

Oh well, them's the breaks I guess.
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Old 02-01-2018, 01:12 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Bands should be run like any other business. What would happen on your job if you said you had some thing else to do?
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Old 02-01-2018, 03:21 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Wait wait -- you mean that you've encountered a flaky musician?! No way! :)

Don't show up for rehearsal prepared = don't want the gig. Can you find a replacement? If so, then replace him, ASAP. You don't have to burn the bridge, although he may act upset at first. Tell him you're looking for someone with more availability. It's a scheduling thing, not a talent thing.
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Old 02-01-2018, 04:58 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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We've cancelled obligations in order to accommodate him and his schedule, which she was irritated about, but let slide at the time.
Why? Why is your schedule so important and his so unimportant?

Quote:
One issue with him is the promoters got free hotel rooms for that gig, but instead of staying with us and sharing a room, he wanted to get a separate room for him and his gal, which I was bothered a bit by just as a "courtesy" issue, but she see's it as an unwillingness on his part to adjust to a touring lifestyle.
It depends on how he wanted it, I guess. Did he ask for it nicely, or did he demand it? How much did it put you out to get it for him? Did it cost you any money? It's reasonable to request two people per room when a client is providing accommodations.

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Then, well called a rehearsal tonight, which hey, if your'e into and excited about the gig you should want to practice and prepare as much as possible right?
Not necessarily. Solid professional musicians won't need to rehearse as much as semi-pro or amateur players. Unless there's exceptional money involved, I don't consider it reasonable to expect more than one rehearsal per gig.

Quote:
Well, he asked that we do another day this week that's convenient for HIM so that he can attend a local blues jam (the bar is shutting that jam down so he really really wanted to attend the last one, even though he's been a couple times this month already.

So my question is, does this indicate a lack of professional attitude on this gig? I mean, the person who is employing him is calling for a rehearsal and his response is to ask his EMPLOYER to accommodate HIM
Are you his employer? If you've just called him for a few gigs, you are not his employer, you're just some guy who needs a guitarist. What is normally done in professional situations is, people talk to each other like adults and figure out a rehearsal time that works for everyone, with everyone respecting each others' time outside of the project. You have to be offering him quite a bit to be demanding that he prioritize your project to the exclusion of everything else in his life.

Quote:
so that he can go to a jam sesh and cozy up to his heroes.
It's not really any of your business what he does with his time, or why.

Quote:
I've gone to some lengths to defend the guy, but even my patience is running out now. If we didn't have an important gig coming up, that would be one thing. But I feel his priorities are not where they should be.
So, it's hard to say if it's a lack of professionalism, because I don't know if he's actually playing your music to a professional standard, and I don't know how much paying work are you actually offering him. It sounds like you're expecting a very one-sided relationship in return for hiring him for a couple of gigs.
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Old 02-01-2018, 05:36 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Toddbishop saved me a great deal of time. Maybe the guitarist is too nice to tell you guys he's not interested after all of the demands you've set for "an opportunity".
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Old 02-01-2018, 07:39 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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Bands should be run like any other business. What would happen on your job if you said you had some thing else to do?
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Old 02-01-2018, 09:12 AM
williamsbclontz williamsbclontz is offline
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

I can see it going both ways. I will say, I've never heard anyone get into such conflict about ONE gig

A lot of guys on here were saying that a band should be ran like a business. That's fine if you want to go that route, but like a business, if I work hard and put in a lot of hours I better get a return $$$. This guy is talking about one upcoming gig and I have no clue what the pay is. Maybe it's a bit morbid but my biggest motivation is getting some rent money. And there's plenty of local bands who would accommodate my busy schedule... bands are too much stress man you can't be getting all worked up over one upcoming gig or y'all won't last long
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Old 02-01-2018, 10:38 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Sorry, I agree with toddbishop.

I've been in enough bands and know enough people whose career's are "on the rise" to know that doesn't really mean anything to me. Everybody's career is "on the rise" in the music business.

And what was the crack about being afraid to leave your 9 to 5? I don't get that one either. Being a starving artist is so over-rated. Having food is a good thing. Owning your own home is a good thing. Being able to see the doctor when you need to is essential. There are a lot of working musicians out there, but the percentage of musicians who actually enjoy a nice lifestyle is actually very small.

Sounds like you guys need to watch "Hired Gun". It's on Netflix.
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Old 02-01-2018, 12:16 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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Sorry, I agree with toddbishop.

I've been in enough bands and know enough people whose career's are "on the rise" to know that doesn't really mean anything to me. Everybody's career is "on the rise" in the music business.

And what was the crack about being afraid to leave your 9 to 5? I don't get that one either. Being a starving artist is so over-rated. Having food is a good thing. Owning your own home is a good thing. Being able to see the doctor when you need to is essential. There are a lot of working musicians out there, but the percentage of musicians who actually enjoy a nice lifestyle is actually very small.

Sounds like you guys need to watch "Hired Gun". It's on Netflix.
This.

I love playing, I never really enjoyed "having" to play......

When I was younger or in my college bands I didn't give a shit if we only made short money for a gig since my essentials were covered.....but Bo makes a real world point.

That being said, if your dream was to be in a touring band then go for it, get it out of your system, or fall in love with it, there are trade offs.

It sounds like you know what to do, you just want someone else to tell you it is OK.....
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Old 02-01-2018, 12:48 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

If it was me in this situation and feeling the way you do, I'd talk to my mate either face to face or over the phone and would open ing the lines of
"mate, I know we've had trouble scheduling rehearsals in the new band and I just wanted to check to see if it's just short term problems or if the band isn't your cup of tea? I'm getting to spend time with my girlfriend so I love it and changing plans is easy for me, but it's obviously totally different for you. I've even been questioning the idea of getting out of the 9 til 5 and doing this full time which is a big step so I just want you to know that if this isn't for you then we'll keep playing together in our other band and my girlfriend can use her contacts to find another guitarist. If you are up for this then let's sit down as a band and agree together on how often we practice and get dates in the diary now so that we can all plan around it."
If I was on the receiving end of something like that I don't think I'd take offence.
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Old 02-01-2018, 01:08 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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Sorry, I agree with toddbishop.

I've been in enough bands and know enough people whose career's are "on the rise" to know that doesn't really mean anything to me. Everybody's career is "on the rise" in the music business.

And what was the crack about being afraid to leave your 9 to 5? I don't get that one either. Being a starving artist is so over-rated. Having food is a good thing. Owning your own home is a good thing. Being able to see the doctor when you need to is essential. There are a lot of working musicians out there, but the percentage of musicians who actually enjoy a nice lifestyle is actually very small.

Sounds like you guys need to watch "Hired Gun". It's on Netflix.
Oh the voice of common sense, speaking like a true pro.

No amount of exposure or goodwill has ever paid bills or a mortgage or put food on the table. I like having the security of the 9-5 covering these bills and the gigs as a nice cherry on top.

A 'career on the rise' means hasn't made it and playing for nothing. 'unwillingness on his part in adjusting to the touring lifestyle'........please get over yourselves!

What is the fee for this really important gig? P.S. you are not his employer. He's providing a service for you. Having that kind of attitude really rubs any musician up the wrong way and bad news travels fast and by putting it on the internet for all to see I'm sure all the drummers on here would avoid this gig like the plague!

When I get hired for a dep gig there's zero practices involved unless it's insanely complicated but in that case I know my limitations and wont take it. Send me the music and it'll be alright on the night, then pay me after the gig and I go home to my wife, that's professionalism.

I'm starting to see why the other band were 'fired' or walked as I'm suspecting. I bet they're really devastated. Which brings me on to the white elephant in the room. Girlfriends in and around bands aka the best way to lose friends and break bands up, your post suggests you've taken sides with the provider of thy nookie and completely overlooked your friend and common sense.

But hey it worked for the Beatles, it can work for you too!
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Old 02-01-2018, 01:48 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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...Girlfriends in and around bands aka the best way to lose friends and break bands up, your post suggests you've taken sides with the provider of thy nookie and completely overlooked your friend and common sense.

But hey it worked for the Beatles, it can work for you too!
You could have put that a skosh more gently, but yeah. I totally agree.
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Old 02-01-2018, 02:34 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Maybe time to try the Pearl forum?

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Old 02-01-2018, 05:19 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Asking someone to be on call for a project he has no vested interest in is ridiculous,unless they are getting a retainer. That's how "pros" who who wish to keep the same band/crew for the entire touring cycle do it. If you are an employee and not an owner,you get paid with the regularity of an employee.
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Old 02-01-2018, 05:34 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

This sort of reminds me of all those craigslist ads that want PRO drummers, with PRO chops, PRO gear, PRO attitude, NO flakes.... and won't pay a dollar, and expect you to chip in for all band fees, and haul a drum set to a rehearsal space 2 hours away...
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Old 02-01-2018, 05:50 PM
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I saw a meme of a picture of Duke Ellington and it said, “....how do I keep my musicians happy? That’s easy. I PAY them” ;)

So that’s how they did it! Who knew?


I apologize to the OP. I think he came here with a somewhat legitimate question and it’s turned into a dump-fest. I say talk over priorities with your buddy and go from there. If he agrees to stay and is unhappy, then he’s not being very professional either.
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Old 02-01-2018, 06:26 PM
williamsbclontz williamsbclontz is offline
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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This sort of reminds me of all those craigslist ads that want PRO drummers, with PRO chops, PRO gear, PRO attitude, NO flakes.... and won't pay a dollar, and expect you to chip in for all band fees, and haul a drum set to a rehearsal space 2 hours away...
Exactly... I mean you started up a band, (so far it sounds like a 3 piece which relies heavily on guitar) and you didn't even sit the guy down and work out an appropriate practice schedule that fits with everyone's agenda?

No offense, but to me it sounds like this is first gig nerves and you're making a big deal out of nothing. You expect multiple practices and 100% obedience in how you think it should go. That's a lot of hours and a lot of hoops to jump through, plus a naggy boss to deal with. The gig better be paying a lot. Also, this guy isn't working a 9-5 for a reason. Either he's really good, or he doesn't like to deal with overbearing bosses which is kind of how your approaching it...
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Old 02-01-2018, 06:50 PM
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You could have put that a skosh more gently, but yeah. I totally agree.
Truth hurts. I have a tendency to call a spade a shovel.

Been there, seen it, got the t-shirt when it comes to original stuff and all the BS that comes with it. The whole we expect total unyielding commitment at the expense of your life to feed our egos.
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Old 02-01-2018, 08:08 PM
brentcn brentcn is offline
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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I saw a meme of a picture of Duke Ellington and it said, ď....how do I keep my musicians happy? Thatís easy. I PAY themĒ ;)

So thatís how they did it! Who knew?
Well, to be fair, there are lots of musicians who gig for fun and don't expect or need to get paid. Younger musicians will give of their time and effort more freely, in exchange for live playing experience. If the OP's guitarist is indeed a working pro who needs to get paid, he should come out and say so, and not passively flake out, decline rehearsals, etc.

I toured with a band, and I was the only member to get paid, because I asked and negotiated it with the band leader. The other members were just excited to be on the road and playing every night. Some members stayed working with the group longer than others, and when they found a young drummer willing to play for free, they stopped calling me.
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Old 02-01-2018, 08:15 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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Well, to be fair, there are lots of musicians who gig for fun and don't expect or need to get paid. Younger musicians will give of their time and effort more freely, in exchange for live playing experience. If the OP's guitarist is indeed a working pro who needs to get paid, he should come out and say so, and not passively flake out, decline rehearsals, etc.

I toured with a band, and I was the only member to get paid, because I asked and negotiated it with the band leader. The other members were just excited to be on the road and playing every night. Some members stayed working with the group longer than others, and when they found a young drummer willing to play for free, they stopped calling me.
I think Duke Ellington is a bit more upscale than what people would be willing to do these days.

Besides, Duke expects pro players. I would be suspect of people willing to do it for experience. I expect pro players too.
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Old 02-01-2018, 10:00 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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I saw a meme of a picture of Duke Ellington and it said, ď....how do I keep my musicians happy? Thatís easy. I PAY themĒ ;)

So thatís how they did it! Who knew?


I apologize to the OP. I think he came here with a somewhat legitimate question and itís turned into a dump-fest. I say talk over priorities with your buddy and go from there. If he agrees to stay and is unhappy, then heís not being very professional either.
I appreciate that Bo. Like I said in the initial post, I didn't want to get too long winded, force people to read a long message, etc etc. Yes, of course I'm aware of the pitfalls of being in a band with my girlfriend.

I think you're right. Discussion may clear up some things. We just need to really know if he's on board for this or not. If no, just be honest and no worries.
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Old 02-01-2018, 10:10 PM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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Truth hurts. I have a tendency to call a spade a shovel.

Been there, seen it, got the t-shirt when it comes to original stuff and all the BS that comes with it. The whole we expect total unyielding commitment at the expense of your life to feed our egos.
She's not demanding anything unreasonable, the impact on his personal life and other gigs is minimal. He agreed to this, he wanted it. She just expected that, since he was eager and excited to work with her, that he would be available for rehearsal for a gig HE WANTED, rather than go to a jam. It seems to the the priority should be her and the gig (as well as all the dates she already has book this spring, summer, and fall), and she, as the band leader and employer, has every reason to expect some kind of priority on this.
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Old 02-02-2018, 12:17 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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... I didn't necessarily take it as we are the new full time official band, just more like temporary fill ins ...
And you wonder why guitarist dude isn't knocking himself out?

Basically, he's doing her a favour by keeping her show on the road while she finds a permanent replacement. Under the circumstances, the guitarist is the one who should be treated extra graciously. (Apart from the old thing of treat others as you would like to be treated.)
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Old 02-02-2018, 01:42 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

If you're basing the lack of professionalism from the the lack of communication about a rehearsal (or like being on call), then I would say hell no. I've been there and told my fellow musicians that I had something planned already. There should be no explanation as of why and it's just a " no I'm not going to be there". It's really that simple. No explaining or telling you why I'm not going to be there. It could be because I've got a date or walking my cat.

If it was my job, then yes I would cancel my plans and would be there.

I've been the guy that turns into a so called asshole in this situation because when I say "no", I get the whole line about not being responsible and dedicated from bandmates. I then say-if you don't like it get someone else. And that's because I value my time and do not give in to the BS guilt trip/manipulation. 100% of the time I will show up whether I want or not if I don't have other plans. It's important to give people personal space in a certain level based on citation with anything family, friends, and bands IMHO!

Most of the time when I have to deal with this is because other people are stressed out with there life. I understand that and don't judge people because that's life. It gets busy! Everyone gets stressed.

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Old 02-02-2018, 03:28 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

I don't know about anyone else here, but I would love to hear some of this gals work....

It would really help to put this in perspective...
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Old 02-02-2018, 03:48 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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She's not demanding anything unreasonable, the impact on his personal life and other gigs is minimal. He agreed to this, he wanted it. She just expected that, since he was eager and excited to work with her, that he would be available for rehearsal for a gig HE WANTED, rather than go to a jam. It seems to the the priority should be her and the gig (as well as all the dates she already has book this spring, summer, and fall), and she, as the band leader and employer, has every reason to expect some kind of priority on this.
Time out. Was it already established when this rehearsal was called? One day out? Two days? Two weeks? I may have missed that.
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Old 02-02-2018, 04:24 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

If this jam session is something he has been actively involved in for a period of time (and its the last one) perhaps you are overlooking how important it may be to him.

As, at the moment, it looks like he is a stop gap guitarist until your girlfriend hires a full time replacements for the band she fired, perhaps you are being unrealistic in your expectations of commitment from someone who may shortly receive a 'thanks for your support, now don't let the door hit you in the ass' speech. Just how much notice did you give him for the practice session? If he had already arranged to attend the jam then its understandable that he can't be available, and the fact that he told you he isn't available on that evening means he is acting in a professional manner.

Surely there are other times you can practice that will be convenient to everyone?

Last edited by crispycritters; 02-02-2018 at 04:25 AM. Reason: Gibberish
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Old 02-02-2018, 05:05 AM
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One issue with him is the promoters got free hotel rooms for that gig, but instead of staying with us and sharing a room, he wanted to get a separate room for him and his gal, which I was bothered a bit by just as a "courtesy" issue, but she see's it as an unwillingness on his part to adjust to a touring lifestyle.
I do NOT get the part about you wanting him to share a room with you!!

You were "bothered" by the fact that he wanted a separate room for "him and his gal?"

Your girlfriend should be thankful that your guitar player is willing to fill in while she finds make other arrangements.

Get off his back.
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Old 02-02-2018, 06:29 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

Always interesting when an OP's righteous indignation gets hosed down.
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Old 02-02-2018, 07:32 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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I don't know about anyone else here, but I would love to hear some of this gals work....

It would really help to put this in perspective...

Yes, i completely agree with that..

Because i also think that is not very reasonable to expect that someone turns around his complete life for 1 gig and a few upcomming festival-dates (which are almost never paid properly..) followed by a little tour that maybe just pays enough for the fuel that has been used..

If there is a realistic chance that at the end of the year 100-150 very well-paid shows have been played, then ofcourse is a different story..

But for some reason thats almost never the case..


Quote:
Originally Posted by MrTheOne View Post
..It seems to the the priority should be her and the gig (as well as all the dates she already has book this spring, summer, and fall), and she, as the band leader and employer, has every reason to expect some kind of priority on this..

To me that depends a lot on what i wrote above..
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Old 02-02-2018, 11:48 AM
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Default Re: Does this sound like a lack of professionalism?

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She's not demanding anything unreasonable, the impact on his personal life and other gigs is minimal. He agreed to this, he wanted it. She just expected that, since he was eager and excited to work with her, that he would be available for rehearsal for a gig HE WANTED, rather than go to a jam. It seems to the the priority should be her and the gig (as well as all the dates she already has book this spring, summer, and fall), and she, as the band leader and employer, has every reason to expect some kind of priority on this.
OK lets understand the basics so we can get a perspective here.

1 What is the fee he is getting per gig. Surely this has been agreed before anyone came on board.
2 What expenses are paid
3 Is the money being paid enough to cover his rent, bills, healthcare, social life and tax whilst touring?
4 Contract detailing the above?

If the answers aren't 1) a shit tonne 2) All of them 3) Yes 4 Yes, then it's another singer with a terminal diagnosis of LSD (Lead Singer Disorder) and your guitarist isn't obliged to do diddly squat and neither would I.

When you're a pro-musician you're self-employed so that kind of blows the my girlfriends an employer and a band leader out of the water. To be a band leader you have to be a white hot player to earn the respect of the other musicians.

........Oh Yoko.......Oh Yoko..............In the middle of a cloud
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