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  #1  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:34 PM
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Default Things a Drummer would never say:

"This house kit rocks!"


Go!
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  #2  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:45 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

"The guitar player and lead singer give me the best advice! They know drum parts better than me."


"My back feels AMAZING!"


"No, I've never seen the 'Drummer at the Wrong Gig' video on Youtube. Please show it to me!"


"Sure, I'd LOVE to play 'Wipeout' for you!"



"Wow, I have so much money."



"I'm thinking of buying a new car, you know, something compact."



"No, I've never heard of Neil Peart."



"I wish my drums were heavier and bulkier."



"Hey, at least cymbals don't cost too much, you know?"
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  #3  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:47 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Muckster View Post
Things a drummer would never say: "This house kit rocks!"

There are tons of clubs with good sets...

The two Jazz Clubs in Valencia, Spain have great sets, also "Unterfart" in Munich, Germany, a Sonor Lite, a LEGENDARY set everyone played, from Roy Haynes, Billy Hart, Bill Stewart (just to name a few) to anyone you can imagine. Another Club that has an amazing set is the Jazz Club in Neuburg, Germany (an old Gretsch kit), anyway...there are many...

Have you played in many clubs?

Here the Munich Set:

Last edited by Alex Sanguinetti; 09-08-2017 at 06:57 PM.
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  #4  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:49 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

"Wow - those B8's are shiny. They sound great."

"Guitar player - please turn up. My ears aren't bleeding enough yet."

"I could sleep on this throne, it's so comfortable."

"I have too many cymbals."

"Of course you can play my kit with your sledgehammer sticks. Don't be afraid to bash the cymbals hard - they're unbreakable. They're metal, you know."

"My Walmart First Act kit sounds way better than that DW kit."

"Can never get me enough Sweet Home Alabama."

"I really enjoy moving my kit from gig to gig. It's the best part of playing out."
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Old 09-08-2017, 06:52 PM
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  #5  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:54 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

"Be sure to buy any drum equipment that has the word 'Pro' in the name. If it says 'Pro,' then it's really professional quality."
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  #6  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:58 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Quote:
Originally Posted by PorkPieGuy View Post
"Be sure to buy any drum equipment that has the word 'Pro' in the name. If it says 'Pro,' then it's really professional quality."
You have me laughing here. Excellent.
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  #7  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:59 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Psssst..... Alex, lighten up...you're way too serious for this thread.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex Sanguinetti View Post
There are tons of clubs with good sets...

The two Jazz Clubs in Valencia, Spain have great sets, also "Unterfart" in Munich, Germany, a LEGENDARY set everyone played, from Roy Haynes, Billy Hart, Bill Stewart (just to name a few) to anyone you can imagine. Another Club that has an amazing set is the Jazz Club in Neuburg, Germany (an old Gretsch kit), anyway...there are many...

Have you played in many clubs?

Here the Munich Set:
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  #8  
Old 09-08-2017, 07:35 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Muckster View Post
Psssst..... Alex, lighten up...you're way too serious for this thread.
Jazz Club Neuberg (aka "Birdland) set:

Played by Daniel Humair:

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  #9  
Old 09-08-2017, 07:36 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

You are absolutely correct. Vocals always start mid bar. Don't worry about it. No one will notice when I adjust the beat to accommodate. I'm the drummer and all timing is my job!
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  #10  
Old 09-08-2017, 08:27 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Why aren't flagship range drums offered with the option of wine red wrap?
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  #11  
Old 09-08-2017, 08:33 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

"You think I look like Animal when I play? Oh thanks, I haven't heard that before!"

"It's okay, I don't need a monitor."
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  #12  
Old 09-08-2017, 08:40 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Dave, your lead guitar is a bit on the quiet side. Do you mind turning it up?
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  #13  
Old 09-08-2017, 08:52 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

No darling, I don't want another drum kit.
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  #14  
Old 09-08-2017, 09:10 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

"I only need one snare drum."

"No, I don't need a drum rug. Having bits of my kit sliding away from me all night sounds like my kind of challenge."

"Ten minute quiet vamp? I love that idea!"

"Sure, person I've never met before who appears intoxicated! I'd love for you to play my kit! Here, try these 2B sticks!"

"You know who's really good at playing for the song? Wailin' Smash, that's who!" (couldn't resist)
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  #15  
Old 09-08-2017, 09:45 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

So, Mr Taylor. You're getting a mortgage. Are you able to afford this on your own?

Why yes, yes I am...
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  #16  
Old 09-08-2017, 10:16 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

My drums are too loud, would anyone mind if I played really softly?

Sure, I'd love to buy a new set of cymbals that you would like better.

Can we play this song at 40bpm? It's too fast.
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  #17  
Old 09-08-2017, 10:20 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

I'm sure glad those Planet Z Zildjian cymbals came with my new drum set. Saved me some money.
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Drumming for fun.
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  #18  
Old 09-08-2017, 10:50 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Jeff Indyke taught me everything I know!
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  #19  
Old 09-08-2017, 11:31 PM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

1-and-a-2-and-a-4

Hey drunk patron, can you carry my bass drum down these steps?

Tighten these stands with those vice grips over there.

Wait, my drums are not in the right key.
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  #20  
Old 09-09-2017, 12:01 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Quote:
Originally Posted by IDDrummer View Post
Jeff Indyke taught me everything I know!
I've missed the Indyke jokes...
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  #21  
Old 09-09-2017, 12:12 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

"Yeah, bassman. I don't really want to count the songs off anyway.."

"Sure dude. Add as much tape as you want."
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  #22  
Old 09-09-2017, 12:20 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

I love it when you smash my cymbals with the head of your guitar. I like it even more when your guitar has metal tuning knobs on it. Hold on, here, smash my thin crash, the other one is way too thick!
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  #23  
Old 09-09-2017, 12:31 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Of course you can stand on my bass drum. That's why I got the 20" deep one.
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  #24  
Old 09-09-2017, 12:37 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Quote:
Originally Posted by IDDrummer View Post
Jeff Indyke taught me everything I know!
We have a winner.....
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Suum cuique tribuere....
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  #25  
Old 09-09-2017, 12:53 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

OMG! I totally forgot about that clown Indyke. Gotta go watch his videos again. LMAO
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  #26  
Old 09-09-2017, 01:02 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

To the bar manager after the gig: "No thanks mate, I don't want a drink on the house."
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  #27  
Old 09-09-2017, 01:11 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

For those who don't know Jeff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cl0oLc0z1Es
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Suum cuique tribuere....

Last edited by GruntersDad; 09-09-2017 at 01:22 AM.
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  #28  
Old 09-09-2017, 01:33 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Quote:
Originally Posted by GruntersDad View Post
For those who don't know Jeff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cl0oLc0z1Es
I had no idea. I'm getting a Christopher Walken vibe. Oh my...
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  #29  
Old 09-09-2017, 01:50 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

I'll take the heavy friend.
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  #30  
Old 09-09-2017, 01:59 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Sure, I'll remove a bass drum head so we can put the beer cooler in there and make more space in the car.
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  #31  
Old 09-09-2017, 02:20 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

"Anyone needs help carrying or setting up their stuff?"

(When setting up or tearing down) "It'll only take a minute"

(In the way to the gig) "Do you guys need a ride?"
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  #32  
Old 09-09-2017, 02:48 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

"I love playing Mustang Sally!"
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  #33  
Old 09-09-2017, 03:30 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Quote:
Originally Posted by GruntersDad View Post
For those who don't know Jeff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cl0oLc0z1Es
Why did you do that? Now I'm not going to be able to stop watching again. :)
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  #34  
Old 09-09-2017, 03:38 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

I'm really glad that you've spread those guitar cases out on the stage right away. Having to step over them with hands full of drums really works my legs out in a good way.
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  #35  
Old 09-09-2017, 04:25 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

The correct answer to the Jeopardy final question

No thanks, I don't drink beer

My investments are through the roof right now

I'll get this round

My favorite Stooge is Larry

Does this shirt go with these pants

Let's go to my place, I'll drive
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  #36  
Old 09-09-2017, 05:37 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Meg White plays too many fills.
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  #37  
Old 09-09-2017, 06:55 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Jared from Drumeo is on my wife's hall-pass list.
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  #38  
Old 09-09-2017, 07:41 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Quote:
Originally Posted by KamaK View Post
Jared from Drumeo is on my wife's hall-pass list.
You sir, are a genius.
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  #39  
Old 09-09-2017, 08:09 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Quote:
Originally Posted by KamaK View Post
Jared from Drumeo is on my wife's hall-pass list.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BacteriumFendYoke View Post
You sir, are a genius.
Agreed. Ding - we have another winner.
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  #40  
Old 09-09-2017, 08:12 AM
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Default Re: Things a Drummer would never say:

Be right back. Have to park my MGB.
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