Issues with getting the right people

You know, this is a real sticking point.

Here's a weird attitude for folks to chew on, and one that probably won't apply to most people. I find at this point in my career that I primarily get along with and play music best with people who do _not_ primarily self-identify as musicians. I know that I don't: I'm a nerd first and foremost. And I gravitate towards people who are "something-else-who-also-play-music" much more than folks who are musicians first, last, and always.

Wasn't always this way. In the 80s, I fronted and drove a band, ran a small project recording studio, and also worked fulltime for a musical instrument design firm, all at the same time. At that point, I identified as a musician who was also a nerd. Played hundreds of club dates with several bands, cooked miles of tape, played with a lot of really fantastic people (with Berkelee right there, there were a lot to play with, every one of whom was far better than I'll ever be). Burned out on it completely, as well. The wick was turned up too high to be sustainable, and I found out that I simply was not cut out to be a professional musician for the rest of my life. The last working band I had back then broke up after going together to see Spinal Tap, I kid you not.

I dropped back to recording only, changed day jobs away from the MI business, and then sold the studio, changed coasts, and dropped further back to just being a nerd for a number of years. Didn't play much until fate handed me a one-off gig playing surf tunes on the beach at Santa Cruz- with a lawyer-who-also-plays, a cabinetmaker-who-also-plays, a carpenter-who-also-plays, and a machinist-who-also-plays. What a revelation. It was the easiest, most copacetic gig ever, and it got me back into playing for the sheer animal joy of playing. And that one-off gig lasted several years, straight through until we relocated out of California for Colorado....

If you are absolutely driven to try to make a living out of music, you will be affiliating yourself with other people who are just that: driven. They may be driven to the lifestyle to live like a rockstar, they may be able to sightread flyshit-on-toast, they may be able to write 3 songs a day and 5 on Sunday- but they will also be *driven*. If your drives do not align pretty much perfectly, you will also drive one another _nuts_. That is the key, I think: everybody has to want more or less the same things from their music. So the first step is to decide what you want from _your_ music: and be brutally honest with yourself.

For me, that was easy. The surf tunes band handed me that revelation on a silver platter. I wanted relaxed, low conflict play for the joy of play, leading to relaxed performance. Playing out was altogether optional. I'd decided years ago that playing out was more of a hassle than it was worth, since there is zero money in music unless you are one of the driven ones. So if a gig was to appear on the horizon, it had to be damned well worth it, and be enjoyable in its own right. Then it could just be fun- not the sort of thing where one missed fill would lead to heated words, the breaking of beer bottles and a summary firing presumably leading to the end of my ever-so-freakin'-illustrious career. What career? I burned out from that sort of pressure, and I'm not going back.

Having had that revelation, I discovered that finding other folks who feel the same way turns out to be remarkably easy. I just have to find other folks who have have been through the same mill, and have moved on with their lives. Damned if they aren't easier to get along with, on average. And pretty much by definition, they all identify as "something-else-who-also-play"...

Your mileage may vary. Probably the vast majority of folks here will be *far* more driven than I am, and if so, your approach will certainly need to vary: but the truth will still be that your drives and goals will have to match for it to work. Go for it, and good luck and Godspeed! But this approach works for 50-something me. (;-) It is best summed up as "Do it until it feels good, not until it hurts!"...
 
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It's so hard to find quality musicians in Australia. I've had to relax my standards just to play with people, and lately it bothers me a bit. Here I am practicing and learning my ass off and stuck with ppl who only pick up their instrument once a week.

I think I could probably find good muso's if I studied music (college) but I kinda missed that boat, I don't want to be a broke ass student again.

I live in hope that if I work on myself and just get out there as much as I can, I'll find what I'm looking for eventually.
 
It's so hard to find quality musicians in Australia. I've had to relax my standards just to play with people, and lately it bothers me a bit. Here I am practicing and learning my ass off and stuck with ppl who only pick up their instrument once a week.

I think I could probably find good muso's if I studied music (college) but I kinda missed that boat, I don't want to be a broke ass student again.

I live in hope that if I work on myself and just get out there as much as I can, I'll find what I'm looking for eventually.
I would've thought in Sydney at least you'd have a decent pool of muso's to choose from.
Are you in a covers band or play originals?
 
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