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  #1  
Old 10-12-2018, 06:33 PM
KathrynL KathrynL is offline
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Default How do you feel during your drum lessons?

Probably a weird post here. Just wondered how other people felt before and during their drum (or any music) lesson. I'm 47. I've been doing lessons for 3 years and I still feel nervous before I go in and quite often get really confused and a bit panicky during a lesson when I don't 'get' what my teacher is talking about. I've had 2 teachers. One 20 years younger. One ten years older. Both really nice guys and I think they're really good teachers. I never have to perform long/whole pieces of music if I don't want to. Both know I get anxious about stuff and don't unnecessarily pressure me. I know this is to do with my personal psyche and I'm working on my confidence in all areas of my life but I'm interested in what others feel during lessons. Maybe the ideal scenario I have in my head where one just breezes through every lesson, laughing all the way and feeling completely uninhibited, ready to do anything, is just totally unrealistic. (Do you reckon??)

Anyway, just asking. Because I don't know any other (adults) learning. Cheers.
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Old 10-12-2018, 08:26 PM
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opentune opentune is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

The fact you feel nervous shows you care, just go with it.
Always recall you paid for your lesson and so its kind of a service to you. You are the customer so try not to feel like the disadvantaged one in the deal. If not getting something, just ask for more attention, or for the same material to be delivered at a slower pace and/or repeated. You have every right to, because you are asking to be taught and paying for it.
What you want to beware of and take under control is if panic or nerves are getting in the way of your drumming.. the joy and fun of it. Ease up on yourself.
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Old 10-12-2018, 10:30 PM
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oldskoolsoul oldskoolsoul is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynL View Post
..I'm 47. I've been doing lessons for 3 years and I still feel nervous before I go in and quite often get really confused and a bit panicky during a lesson when I don't 'get' what my teacher is talking about..

But, thats exactly why you go to a lesson, to try to understand what the teacher says and to learn from that..

Meaning, you should not feel confused and panicky at such moments, but curious..Curious to find out what the teacher means and then once you understand and learn to apply, you again became a little a better drummer than the day before..

I mean, you are not going to a lesson to show that you allready are a perfect drummer, but you are going to a lesson to become a little a better one each time..
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Old 10-12-2018, 11:30 PM
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JustJames JustJames is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

When I took lessons, at a similar age to yours, FWIW, my teacher was in a studio literally 30 seconds walk from my work. The counter productive thing for me was that I would sit down at the kit with a head full of work.

Lessons improved a whole lot when I started spending a few minutes with sticks in hands going over the previous week's material.
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Old 10-12-2018, 11:32 PM
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8Mile 8Mile is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

I'm not taking drum lessons right now, but I recently started studying piano and theory at a local music conservatory. I'm 51 and my teacher is in his late-20s.

I feel a combination of excitement and nerves at my lessons. I haven't felt that way behind a drum set in many years, but this is new and difficult and I find that exhilarating. I can relate to how you feel, but I guess I relish it.
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Old 10-13-2018, 12:31 AM
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larryace larryace is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

If you don't understand something, by all means, ask for clarification. If you're not getting it, and the teacher isn't picking up on that, don't go any further until you're clear. Admitting I totally am clueless about something has served me very well.
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  #7  
Old 10-13-2018, 04:25 AM
Jml Jml is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

KathrynL,

Nice to hear from similar middle aged noobs to the drums. Iím 49 and started taking lessons about 6 months ago. Never had the time or money when my kids were younger. Finally decided to take the plunge and Iím glad I did. My instructor is great and easy to talk to. But I still feel nervous before each lesson (even though I practice) and ďcramĒ the previous weekís lesson, like I would if I was back in school before a test. I think the nerves will eventually dissipate as you get more comfortable, but I know they also help to push me to get better and practice because I feel like I donít want to let my instructor or myself down. As others said, weíre PAYING for lesson time.

Wish you luck in your drumming journey.
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Old 10-13-2018, 04:34 AM
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Dr_Watso Dr_Watso is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

I usually "feel" like I can't do even the simple stuff I normally wouldn't even think about.

I'm used to it now and just know that I won't play to full ability under the gaze of a good instructor. Being watched by someone who is specifically meant to pull apart my playing just doesn't put me in the best mind-frame to impress... Lucky for me I'm there to learn and not impress.
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  #9  
Old 10-13-2018, 04:54 AM
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Jbravo Jbravo is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

I havenít taken a one on one lesson since I was 14, but I was away from drums ( playing bass and singing) for over 30 years. The reason I came back is that I have always loved drums, and I wanted to do something purely because I wanted to do it, and enjoy it.

My family, my living, nothing is riding on my ability or skill at it. Itís just for my enjoyment, with side benefits of being good stretching and exercise, and a wonderful stress relief.

If your in the same situation, which it sounds like you are, concentrate on learning, gaining the skills to stretch your comfort zone, and mostly just enjoying the time you can play. You have nothing to prove to anyone but you.

A good instructor wants to see you improve, and while they should critique your playing to help you grow, they wonít judge you, and it sounds like you enjoy the ones you work with.

Just try to loosen up and have fun, and remember that the fate of the world isnít riding on what youíre doing. If you make mistakes-thatís what practice is for. :)
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  #10  
Old 10-13-2018, 11:25 AM
dmacc dmacc is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

I took weekly private lessons on drums from 10 years old until I was was approx 22. About 7 of those years I had more than one teacher - one for drum set and one for orchestral style (concert snare / tympani / mallets).

Every week was nerve wracking. 100% self induced. It was the desire to execute in the lesson room with the same accuracy/proficiency I was (generally) able to do at home by the end of the week. Wanted to prove I could do it. My success rate was 50%.

My teachers always told me they understood the situation exists. Why? They are / were students of the instrument too. They could relate.

As a teacher myself - I always adopted the perspective of performance anxiety on the side of the student and always accommodated for that.

I am now 52 and have been studying privately with two different teachers - a clarinet teacher and a sax teacher at a local highly regarded community music school They are world class players and more importantly - they are world class teachers.

At our age(s) it's important to have teachers who understand how to work with adult students. Many (some) teachers do not.

I'd say what you experience is somewhat typical. It's how you learn to deal and express it, is what matters. Ensure your let him know that you feel this way so he can help work through it with you.

ETA: I still experience that same "need" to execute feeling at my lessons. With that comes nerves. My self-imposed demand and drive to be flawless is just who I am. With that, I am able to reflect on past experience and it put into perspective to help control it. My teachers are nothing more than 100% supportive and at our ages (both older than me) - we sometimes discuss the challenges we face daily one execution in general and they know/understand/relate to the issue with nerves.

Last edited by dmacc; 10-13-2018 at 12:13 PM.
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  #11  
Old 10-13-2018, 12:06 PM
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basset52 basset52 is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

I'm 65 years old and I had 4 lessons earlier this year and 1 just recently.
2 Different teachers. I returned to drums after a 40 year abscence. I was anxious before all of those lessons and the first few minutes into them. I suppose I didn't want to look like a dill. I think its pretty normal to feel this way. I think my teachers were a bit nervous too! One of them remarked how he usually teaches kids but to have an adult come along with very specific learning goals was unusual and a bit intimidating.!
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Old 10-13-2018, 12:30 PM
dmacc dmacc is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

Quote:
Originally Posted by basset52 View Post
I'm 65 years old and I had 4 lessons earlier this year and 1 just recently.
2 Different teachers. I returned to drums after a 40 year abscence. I was anxious before all of those lessons and the first few minutes into them. I suppose I didn't want to look like a dill. I think its pretty normal to feel this way. I think my teachers were a bit nervous too! One of them remarked how he usually teaches kids but to have an adult come along with very specific learning goals was unusual and a bit intimidating.!
Yes.. there are many teachers who do not know or understand the difference between teaching the two different profiles.
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Old 10-13-2018, 03:59 PM
Jml Jml is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

Thatís funny. My instructor teaches several adults, and he prefers them over kids because adults tend to be more attentive and have specific goals. It also makes me feel good because I see Iím not the only one doing this later in life.
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Old 10-13-2018, 05:46 PM
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No Way Jose No Way Jose is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynL View Post
Maybe the ideal scenario I have in my head where one just breezes through every lesson, laughing all the way and feeling completely uninhibited, ready to do anything, is just totally unrealistic.
I don't think that is right for me, but it might be right for you. I think that I learn best when testing the limit of my ability. It's difficult sometimes. And it should be difficult. Because if it is easy then I'm not working hard enough.
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Old 10-13-2018, 06:29 PM
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larryace larryace is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

I apologize if the following is totally off the mark.

If you can't do the lesson for your teacher but can do it alone, that is a reliable indicator that you are creating the blockages. It sounds more like a social anxiety thing, not a drumming thing. Learning how to get out of your own way is the best thing you can do. Don't get caught up in the mindset that you are being tested. Failing is how you learn the fastest. So failing could be the fastest way forward. Allow yourself to fail, own it, be proud of it. It's very liberating. I've found that people LOVE to help someone who can readily admit their shortcomings. That is a sign of security.

The overwhelming majority of drumming issues...they start in the mind of the drummer.
You are hamstringing yourself with your own feelings. You have control over this, use it. Put feelings aside for practice. This is a very common thing for newer drummers, hamstringing themselves. Get out of your own head. Your feelings are not your friend at lessons. So don't allow them to interfere. You are a cold blooded sniper at lessons.

Think of it like riding a bike. You aren't looking down at your feet pushing the pedals, (focusing inside) you are looking where you are going so you don't crash into something (getting out of your own head and seeing the big picture) If you focusing on pushing the pedals, you will crash. And crashing is OK, as long as it's not from focusing inward.
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  #16  
Old 10-13-2018, 07:13 PM
cornelius cornelius is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

I think because I started lessons when I was very young, Iím very used to the process, so as an adult I donít get nervous before/during a lesson. Excited, yes - but not nervous...

In my experience, itís on the gig where the pressure is on - I think of the learning environment as a comfortable place, where I can make mistakes because Iím there to learn. I donít think itís unrealistic to be uninhibited during a lesson, but breezing through is never what I picture. Learning is a challenge, and itís ok to stumble.

I donít think I play particularly well at a lesson - itís a very left-brain experience, so even though normally I can be critical and very hard on myself, I cut myself some slack.
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  #17  
Old 10-15-2018, 09:28 AM
KathrynL KathrynL is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

Gosh. This is great. So nice to log in and get so many replies. All really helpful to me. I guess I'd worked quite a lot of this out by now but since I'd never shared with anyone, thought I was just an oddball for feeling like this. Nothing wrong with oddballs of course. Thanks so much! xKath
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  #18  
Old 10-17-2018, 07:07 AM
bgood bgood is offline
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Default Re: How do you feel during your drum lessons?

I get nervous and a bit wound up if I play poorly. It's 100% self-induced. My teacher is very supportive but also a ball buster and won't let anything slide. That's why I've been with him for 4 years. Very high bar and no participation trophies 😀
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