The Thrill Is Gone

Skyking

Skyking

Senior Member
Anybody been here? The band you started is all over the place musically. We are playing everything from Santana to Waylon Jennings. Then a new member joins and now we are playing John Mayor too. I suggest we find a genre (rock, country, pop) and stick with it but I'm just the drummer and what would I know? OK fine, I've got thick skin but I'm to the point that I dislike so many of our songs enough that I don't even want to practice anymore. After 3years with these guys is it fair to tell them that the thrill is gone and so am I? When and why does an aging recreational drummer pull the plug? I love playing rock and roll, we really do sound good, but maybe I'm in the wrong band.
 
Try writing songs more together. I bet all those influences together would make for some interesting stuff.
 
Sounds like you really know the answer already. Follow your gut. If you're a recreational drummer and not in it for the money then you must be in it for the joy of playing music. No joy? Go where you can find some.
 
Assuming that you get a fair shake at choosing the songs, and everyone is similarly motivated, the best situation you can reasonably expect is where you like 20% of the songs in a 5-piece band. But, you can't choose songs that are beyond the group's abilities, out of the range of the singer, or demand crazy instrumental work while singing. So do your research, and find songs you like that the band can play, and insist on playing them in the name of fairness. If it will help, offer to sing lead.

But why are you so hung up on what songs your band plays? What do you like about the songs you like? Can you find anything to appreciate within the songs you don't like?
 
I take it the social side is good but the music not. If you have the time you could find a second band.

If you like hanging out with the guys then an attitude shift might help keep the fun and enjoy the music more. Bermuda has sometimes said here that he's not worried about the songs because, whatever it is, he just likes playing drums.

I think there's enjoyment to be had playing (almost) any music. I didn't care for some of my band's songs but once you develop a song's own particular feel you start liking the music more. The worst thing to do is to be slapdash and disconnected because you don't like a song. That just makes it 100x worse. Play it with feel, even if the music sucks yarbles.

Also, as drummer you have a big say over the genre. Arguably more than any other instrument. If you want the set to be cohesive with diverse covers then you have to make the songs your own. Santana and John Mayer aren't so incompatible - they're both funky.

I'd love to play some John Mayer tunes but it wouldn't fit my band's style haha
 
Been there ...know what you mean. I think this can go in waves really. Sometimes it is great to be playing ANY material (most times actually) however if stuff is stale or you feel limited in anyway but are playing out alot...it can get old as well.

Have played in some bands where it was all guitar all the time and rhythmically it was same old same old....that CAN get to be a grind after awhile.

Balance ....in songs styles and even players is what keeps it interesting.
 
Personally, I wouldn't play a John Mayer song if I was held at gunpoint. Just because you're "just the drummer" doesn't mean you don't have a say in the band's direction. If you want to try to stick with it, the best you can do is try your best, make them realize your value, and at the same time, tell them what you really think. Chances are, other people are thinking the same things, but just aren't saying it.
 
First, I thought this was going to be about the song The Thrill Is Gone, which our band plays. I do like playing that song! ;)

This is a subject I'm sure most of us have had to deal with at some time or another. I've certainly been there with my current band. When we were two guitars, bass and drums, we were doing a lot of originals and some covers that weren't well known. Even though we played them well, the audiences weren't responding too enthusiastically. Then one guitarist left and we brought in a keyboardist, which really opened up the types of songs we could perform.

I've been on the opposite end of the stick, because I have been very vocal about suggesting songs for the band to play, and many cases, for me to sing lead on. This has resulted in mixed success. We spent several practices trying to work on Rocket Man, only to eventually scrap it when I just couldn't get the vocals down correctly. I felt pretty bad about that. I also suggested Follow Me by Uncle Cracker. I found the hard way that my voice isn't strong enough in the required range to carry it alone, so I had to have backing vocals, which proved to be challenging. We keep it in our set list, but it is not one of our best performances.

I also suggest certain ways to modify the way we play some of our songs, and again with a range of success. NEVER feel that just because you are the drummer you have to sit there and do everything someone tells you, unless you are a hired gun in the studio.

I manage a lot of people at work, and I am constantly asking for suggestions on how we improve business. I don't want a bunch of YES men working for me.
 
Take to using a water pistol and firing at them when the song sucks.

They'll soon get the message and with luck they'll fire you so you'll be spared saying I'm outta here.

I'm always trying new ways to be helpful.

Davo
 
brentcn said:
Assuming that you get a fair shake at choosing the songs, and everyone is similarly motivated, the best situation you can reasonably expect is where you like 20% of the songs in a 5-piece band. But, you can't choose songs that are beyond the group's abilities, out of the range of the singer, or demand crazy instrumental work while singing. So do your research, and find songs you like that the band can play, and insist on playing them in the name of fairness.
Click to expand...

Above is good advice.............do your research.
I am a believer that it is good to have many types of music in a band's arsenal.
I've been in bands that can play Billy Ray Cyrus and Captain Beyond in the same set..............and if you do them really well, the crowd gets it.
 
I wonder, if you left, could you find another band or start another band that played most everything you like?

I've only played in one band that I liked everything we played. The others were variety bands and we played all kinds of stuff. A lot of it I didn't care for but the audience did. That's all I really cared about.
 
I may be pulling the "plug" on the band I'm in before long. Not so much for the music we play but more for the "conflict" that goes along with certain members in the group. It's not fun anymore so it's time to get out.
Being in a band is supposed to be fun...the money you make at gigs is an added bonus.

At least that's how I think.
 
In one of the bands I was in, anyone in the band could veto a song. We were all close friends, so it was not much of a problem. My current band is a blues band. The two guitarists keep bringing in classic rock songs that are not blues, so we play some of them, but only a few. Our new bass player, who is a great bassist, pulled out an original tune that is a slow swamp-pop song. I really do not like that stuff at all, but many people here in central Louisiana do. When I played the song for my wife, her comment was, "People will get up and dance to that." The song is also a little bluesy, so we will keep it. If it is only one, I can deal with it.

I am 55, so I am only going to play stuff I like. Peace, goodwill, and blues.
 
inneedofgrace said:
what is a swamp-pop song?
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banjo-kermit.jpg
 
Thanks for all of the good advice. I figured many of you had been there before. Should I Stay Or Should I Go? But, IMHO I don't think my band is going anywhere at least not until we decide what kind of band we are, country, pop, or rock. And then there is the issue of playing songs that I or any member of our band does not like. I am a go along to get along believer BUT after a a year or two or three wouldn't you tell even your friends "thanks but no thanks, you go on without me."

I've always been a risk taker and not finding another band doesn't scare me. Losing the thrill I feel when I play a great song is a fear that makes me think it's time to have a talk with the guys because I am prepared to walk without regret. But crap I just don't have it all figured out yet and I'll bet a lot of you have had this talk with yourselves.
 
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