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  #41  
Old 06-27-2010, 02:39 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

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Originally Posted by Pocket-full-of-gold View Post
Just one mans opinion here, but with respect to the whole email thing, I don't really get it. Has technology made us that weak that we can't speak face to face anymore?

If I recieved an email highlighting my shortcomings from a fellow band member, I wouldn't respond to it until I saw him face to face at rehearsal anyway. Issues can't be resolved via email IMO......look at all the 'flare ups' on the forum that are caused by misunderstandings of the written word. Maybe I'm old fashioned, but if humanly possible, I'd rather resolve disputes by looking them in the eye over a beer.
My original suggestion was to address the issue at a more appropriate time. However, if it's that difficult to get face to face time with this guy, I would have no problem with initiating an email. You can always follow up in person.
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  #42  
Old 06-27-2010, 03:09 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

I'm so much more eloquent behind a keyboard than face to face. I can list all the reasons, and he can't sidetrack me. That way I can speak my piece, worded how I want it, and get in and get out with minimal BS. There can be no fight per se, just a statement of fact as I see it, and a request that he alter his behavior when I do something off. I'm just slightly uncomfortable in his presence, don't know why, just am. I think he would prefer it this way, I know I would. To me is just the most painless way. Now the other guy I would not have an issue with face to face, because I don't feel uncomfortable around him.
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  #43  
Old 06-27-2010, 04:11 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

I agree with Malti et al. You are a class blues drummer and theguy should be grateful for the excellent tempo control, timing, chops, supportiveness, taste, feel and groove you bring to the table. If he's like SRV or Jeff Healey, okay, he has the right to dis you. If not, then he's a clown. If he disses audibly you on stage he's a tragic clown.

Larry, what is going on in Blues Land? First a singer who inflicts embarrassing potty humour on you and the audience, then a guitarist who sulks off stage mid-performance because the sax player had more solo time than him, and now a guy who incorporates audible chastisement into the group's stage act ...

All those years playing at bars, all those years drinking, all those lost brain cells ... is that it? ... or do you just have a talent for collecting idiots? :)

For perspective, imagine the scenario ... a full stage production, top actors, full orchestra. During a quiet, intimate moment the drummer makes a small, microtiming error on the ride cymbal. The audience don't care and remain enthralled in the vibe of the moment ... suddenly, from the pit ... "Aw, c'mon! Get it together, man!".

It breaks the spell. From Aeolian: Reminding them of the mistake that they may have not even noticed, or at least making the mistake the most memorable part of the performance.

The guy's a dick, Larry. Next time he does it get up off the drums, walk over to him and punch him in the face. Then go back to the drums and keep playing as though nothing had happened. You'd probably get cheered and it would make the moment even more memorable for the audience ;-)
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  #44  
Old 06-27-2010, 05:23 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

The other factor on this issue it this.
If someone reacts on stage to an error like the guitar player did.
It can cause a snowball effect that can detract from the other members of the bands performance.
The whole band can become uneasy and more mistakes could occur!
Not smart!
The whole band can become nervous and lose their vibe. That should never happen!
A member of the band over reacts to a small thing. Now every member of the band has it in the back of their mind that things aren't going well.
Guess what, Things will not go well under those circumstances!
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  #45  
Old 06-27-2010, 06:35 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Wow I can't believe how riled up this got everyone. We've got the perennially level headed Caddy suggesting I respond in kind (if the talk didn't work) and now Grea saying I should punch him in the face? Surely you can't be serious?
Hey man I'm lovin the support, but I can't do those things. The guy isn't a dick all the time Pol, just when he does that. Oh and when he walked offstage and caused us to lose a great player and some killer songs that we can't do anymore. It's funny I never thought of myself as collecting idiots, I just figured out of everyone you play with, there will be a certain percentage of weirdness you have to negotiate. And just for the record, this isn't a blues band per se, we cover a variety of genres, and that's why I don't want to quit. This band has taken me out of my comfort zone and made me a more rounded player. Plus we gig way more than my beloved Blue Bizness, and stage time rules...
The email really should straighten things out. If it doesn't then I'll be back here asking for suggestions.

Unrelated, if you want to take a look at the potty humor guy, here he is:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p591OpyY-WQ
It's the singer with the Buddy Guy copy polka dot Fender Strat .

You guys rock, thanks for your support.
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  #46  
Old 06-27-2010, 06:44 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

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Originally Posted by larryace View Post
Wow I can't believe how riled up this got everyone. We've got the perennially level headed Caddy suggesting I respond in kind (if the talk didn't work)
I'm not riled up, I just have kids, so I've seen this before. Sometimes people lack the ability to see things from other peoples' perspectives, so if a civil talk doesn't change a behavior which is totally unacceptable, then sometimes you've got to show them how it feels. They usually get the idea from then on...

Happy band parenting! :D
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  #47  
Old 06-27-2010, 09:09 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

I will take getting the evil eye or verbal abuse as long as everyone in the room paid a hundred bucks for their ticket, and the guy doing the evil eye is Sting or someone of that caliber, and I'm making 5 figures for being there.

Otherwise, 3 hrs of music is going to have a bushel of mistakes, and it's our responsibility as musicians and human beings to boost up anyone who's having trouble. It takes a very small person to give dirty looks or verbal abuse, and frankly I would have gotten right in his face after the set. Nobody who has committed to all the prep to play a gig deserves to have their evening ruined by someone who thinks they are King Poop of Turd Island.

I guess you're right Larry, you got us all riled up! I guess we've all met versions of this person before.
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  #48  
Old 06-27-2010, 09:56 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Larry, you covered the correct response to a blunder in your OP:
Why so serious? I totally laugh off their mistakes, what are you gonna do? You can't unring that bell, so best to make light of it and use it to look like you're having a good time, right?
The moment has passed so all you can do is enjoy the following moments. Last year I saw a blues band lead by a vocalist/hapr player who (amazingly) had a couple of major hits in Oz in the 80s. He's a high quality player and his current band are also quality musos. During the evening, they played the hit song. The drummer is great - as tasty a feel and groove as you'll ever hear - and somehow he managed to do a titanic blunder in that hit song - and since just about everyone there would have known every bar of that song there was no way to hide.

The drummer smiled sheepishly. The band leader looked back and briefly grinned at him. The bassist cracked up and had an attack of the giggles that he couldn't shake. The audience applauded at the end of the song, as usual.

The correct response with a desired outcome ... and from pros.

I don't normally don't condone violence so please make sure that when you punch him in the face you do it gently ...
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  #49  
Old 06-27-2010, 12:19 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

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Originally Posted by Pollyanna View Post
You are a class blues drummer and theguy should be grateful for the excellent tempo control, timing, chops, supportiveness, taste, feel and groove you bring to the table.
+1.

I've heard your playing mate....you don't need to sweat anything. So you made a mistake (if I had a buck for every one I've made I'd be a rich man). Let's be honest here, no-one's hitting anyone. This is not worth hanging anyone over, but it's definitely worth highlighting....email or word of mouth, your call. But tell him....hopefully he'll see that it is indeed unprofessional and learn to let the little things slide.

Larry, you are a fine drummer. Raise your issue (as it is certainly a fair one) and don't doubt the influence your playing has on the band. I think he'll listen, mate.
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  #50  
Old 06-27-2010, 01:01 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Just as a little sidenote:

The absolute best piece of musical advice I EVER got was from an ex-drum teacher. I had made a mistake during a big band piece and was complaining about how it had almost ruined the tune.

He simply shrugged and said 'It's just music'.

Your guy needs to lighten the hell up.
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  #51  
Old 06-27-2010, 01:04 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Calling out mistakes is for the rehearsal room. Never ever on stage. I don't know how best to cure it but I know it's wrong. Complete crap really.

EDIT: I have a tendency to just say stuff in plain language free of emotion ASAP before I get pissed off enough to be pissed off. Granted some stuff needs finesse but I am consistent. In this case i would have got his attention between songs and told him simply that next time he did that I would place a stick up his rump till it disappeared. Mallets are good for this duty. And smile when you say it...so the poor little quitar player doesnt feel to threatened.

Last edited by jim_gregory; 06-27-2010 at 01:19 PM.
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  #52  
Old 06-27-2010, 04:07 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Hey Larry,
Do you have access to a backhoe?
Do you know how to build a 6 foot by 3 foot wooden box?
Guitars make excellent grave markers also!
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  #53  
Old 06-27-2010, 06:18 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Bob, my father and uncle are in the heavy equipment rental business, so yea.
Actually my uncle is one of the only people in the US that will rent you a crane that goes up like 300 feet. I could get that and just hold him up in the air until he promises to play nice.
I'm thinking of sending him a link to this thread.
I wouldn't do that but it's fun to think about. Actually I want to keep this place from everyone, that way I can feel free to vent here without letting anyone in on all my drama.
I would especially like to see his face after reading Bob the Burier's comment.
You guys so got my back, I feel INVINCEABLE!
Thanks for the kind words PFOG. You have it in the proper perspective. And you're right I think he will listen. If not I have some heavy equipment with his name on it lol.
Spreggy, you nailed it, we've all had someone like this it seems.
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  #54  
Old 06-27-2010, 06:24 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Jeez .. that's pretty awful.

Digging the grave might be a little much, but it's a good option to keep in your back pocket. =)

Has your guitarist ever called you out like that during practice? I'm wondering if he feels empowered by being on stage, and belittling you in front of the audience is what gets him off? Regardless, you'd be hard pressed to find one person in the audience that even heard your mistake .. but they probably saw it after it was pointed out.

Deal with this in person .. not via text, or email. He acted cowardly by doing it on-stage, you'll be the better person for doing it in private, and in person.

If that fails, just beat his ass.
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  #55  
Old 06-27-2010, 06:46 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

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Originally Posted by larryace View Post
Spreggy, you nailed it, we've all had someone like this it seems.
Nup, never had anything like it in 30 years. It's bizarre behaviour. Listen to Bob, Larry, that boy has his head screwed on :)
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  #56  
Old 06-27-2010, 07:03 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

I like the 300 foot crane idea.
That sounds like fun!

Seriously, I think that the face to face level headed confrontation thing is the way to go.
If that doesn't work. Well....
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  #57  
Old 06-27-2010, 07:35 PM
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Has your guitarist ever called you out like that during practice? I'm wondering if he feels empowered by being on stage, and belittling you in front of the audience is what gets him off? Regardless, you'd be hard pressed to find one person in the audience that even heard your mistake .. but they probably saw it after it was pointed out.

Deal with this in person .. not via text, or email. He acted cowardly by doing it on-stage, you'll be the better person for doing it in private, and in person.
No Ryan, I was never called out during practice. I don't know if he feels like big man onstage or if my mistakes totally embarrass him to the point of involuntary reaction. I think it's the latter. Drummer mistakes are pretty noticeable, but mine weren't that noticeable the other night, they were really pretty minor.

I am unable to be a hypocrite, it's the one thing in my life I cannot let pass without a fight, hypocrisy. By me "kicking his ass" that would make me the heavy, and I would have one more person on this earth who thinks I'm hard to work with. I already have 3, that's enough thank you very much. Gotta lead by example. I'm an entrenched member of the "Lighten up, it's supposed to be enjoyable" musical party.
I try to take the high road, it has always served me well in the past. Against most advice here, I'm emailing. If that doesn't work, then I will do the face to face. It's better if he has it written down in black and white, in case he forgets a point or 2. I'll post the email here after I send it.
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  #58  
Old 06-27-2010, 07:43 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

FWIW, I agree that face to face is better. If anything, it helps to keep the temperature down. You don't want this to blow up into a big deal (even though it sort of is in terms of the unprofessional muso self limiting his career). You can frame it as a small improvement in the bands presentation without obviously making it personal.

My last band kind of imploded over people venting in e-mails. While you can speak your piece without interuption, the recipient can also sit and stew in their feelings and start taking things the wrong way. Next thing you know you have a flame war.

Face to face gives you the immediate feedback that you're being understood, or it's a hopeless case and you can just drop it before things get worse.
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  #59  
Old 06-27-2010, 07:52 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

This is a first for me. I never had to confront any band member about a "heavy" issue before. I really feel the email thing will work as I think it will. If it doesn't, then I will bite the bullet and approach the subject again, this time face to face. I do respect everyones opinion here, but I'm not ready for that yet, it's not that monumental of an issue. I want to keep this thing as light as possible by just making a list of reasons why it's no good to act like that onstage. Maybe then he can print it out and refer back to it.
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  #60  
Old 06-27-2010, 11:13 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Aeolin is right, Email will only turn into a war.
The person reading the email cannot hear the tone of your voice while reading it.

Every time I try to talk about even a minor band problem via email, the crap always hits the fan!
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  #61  
Old 06-27-2010, 11:23 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

As a band, you are supposed to show a UNIFIED FRONT. Publicly dissing another band member is not professional and NOT COOL ! Sometimes a band member will do this to cover HIS/her mistake. If HE/she makes a mistake and points a finger at you, he is very immature. I find that some band leaders are worst for this.

Dan
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  #62  
Old 06-27-2010, 11:36 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

The thing is, he has not a leg to stand on. He can't win that argument. I doubt he'll even try. That's why if I just state facts and don't berate him, I'm just making a request, how can he refuse? I could say something like:

Les, (not his real name)
If I could make a request I would really appreciate your consideration,
Regarding any onstage acknowledgement of my screw ups, for the sake of the audience, and equally important how we come off as a band, could you refrain from chastizing my missteps in the future? It doesn't look good to the audience, I can't take it back at that point, but most of all, I feel belittled. You paint yourself in a bad light as well to the audience, who probably never even knew anything was not right anyway. You can say anything you want after the gig about anything that bothered you, but as professionals, the best way to handle that is either don't react, or laugh it off up there, don't you agree?

Now if he replies in a negative manner to that...I really don't think he will because like I said, he's not an unreasonable guy.
If he brings up my mistakes, then I could easily let the conversation degrade into a pissing contest, but I won't be party to that.
I would just acknowledge my mistakes, point out that they are infrequent, and stick to my request, and perhaps and ask him to compromisee. I'll do my best to minimize mistakes if he agrees to not highlight them as they happen. Easy, cheesy, Japanesey.
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  #63  
Old 06-27-2010, 11:44 PM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Larry, Just sit down with him, have a beer, and tell him to his face.
That proposed email made me puke!
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  #64  
Old 06-27-2010, 11:49 PM
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No dammit, I'm emailing him this pukey email!
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  #65  
Old 06-28-2010, 01:03 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

I've been reading this thread on and off for the last couple days and figured that I really didn't have much to add, but larryace you keep saying that he is a reasonable person, you noticed I didn't call him a man. A reasonable man would not call you out in front of an audience or clientele for a simple mistake, several times at that. It sounds as if he is having some personal problems of his own and this might be one way to feel better about himself.. I have never done this to anyone I've ever worked with. If a problem occurs you meet with the individual on a one on one basis and not put it up to public scrutiny which he is doing. I know exactly what I would do, but it's not me in this situation. You seem to me to be a gentleman who would rather leave status quo rather than ripple the waves, I can't fault you on that, but you have only two sides of your face to get slapped before you might take this event to a much deeper level personally than what it is right now. I would at least talk with him one on one and find out if in his professional opinion if he believes you are letting the band down in some form or another that he feels the need to belittle you as he's doing. Put the ball in his court at least he might be honest and shed his feelings, maybe it really has nothing to do with you and your just being his scape goat..

Yea, I will tell you what I would do. I wouldn't put up with it if it happened even a second time. Because he would have had an ultimatum after the first. A band takes a certain type of synergy to work and that means practice sessions just to keep tight and maybe learn new songs along the way. It's got to be enjoyable, when it's not the audience can get the vibe.

Sorry this is happening to you and good luck.
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  #66  
Old 06-28-2010, 01:52 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

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No dammit, I'm emailing him this pukey email!
I didn't mean to put salt on your wound, As my bandmates like to say, I was just being "Boblike"
I never patronize my friends. I tell them nicely how I really feel.
Trust me on this one, Emails don't cut it the same way that two guys having a beer together do.
He won't respond to you the same in an email as he would in person.
He will either patronize you or he will just plain get hostile.

In person he will tell you his real feelings, Bad or Good.
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Old 06-28-2010, 02:03 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

You know what my son's high school volleyball team does after every play, and especially if they lose a point, and doubly so if it was a mistake on someone's part? They come together quickly, high fives all around, and someone with a mistake gets extra pats and handshakes and high fives. Never let someone suffer over a mistake, get them back on track, and be positive. Basic teamwork and professionalism.

There's a singer who was much-loved by the management of an entertainment group that I often work for, because he was pretty good with the crowd and had good stage presence. But nobody liked working with him because he would get in everybody's face on stage about all kinds of things. And believe me he did not have the talent to even form an educated opinion about musicians. He got on my "won't play with this guy" list at the office, and maybe a dozen others. Long story short, I worked last night, he didn't.
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  #68  
Old 06-28-2010, 02:51 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

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I didn't mean to put salt on your wound, As my bandmates like to say, I was just being "Boblike"
I never patronize my friends. I tell them nicely how I really feel.
Trust me on this one, Emails don't cut it the same way that two guys having a beer together do.
He won't respond to you the same in an email as he would in person.
He will either patronize you or he will just plain get hostile.

In person he will tell you his real feelings, Bad or Good.
No salt sting here Bob. Hey how about a compromise, how about a phone call? As you can see I'm avoiding a face to face.
I don't really go out to drink beer, and he doesn't either, (Tequila is his poison), so it would seem really strange to him if I said, Hey Les, let's go out for a drink. I try to minimize my one on one time as it is with him, we are like oil and water. So how about that phone call?
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  #69  
Old 06-28-2010, 03:06 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Phone call is good.
If he doesn't show any remorse for what he did then its time to replace him or move on.

Tequila! No Wonder!
That stuff makes me go nuts. I can drink a civilized liquor like Vodka and Beer all night, but give me Tequila or Whisky and Its get handcuffed time for me!
I havent touched that stuff since high school!
To bad, because I really like 48 oz Margaritas.

There's his problem right there. He needs to change his drinking preference. LOL
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Old 06-28-2010, 03:13 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

I've never seen him drunk, him and the bassist always have a shot or 2 before first set, they claim it helps them get in the zone. Me, forget it. Just water. Alcohol really affects my execution, not in a good way.

OK I'll do the phone call. That I can handle. I'll follow your Boblike advice.
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  #71  
Old 06-28-2010, 04:36 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Larry, phone call is better than email.

I noticed your proposed mail had "you" statements in it. Any communication consultant will advise against using any statement containing "you". Typically, it causes a defensive reaction in the recipient. Even if they don't realize it. Telling someone "You do this" or "You shouldn't do that" triggers the limbic fight or flight reflex.

My personal advice would be to just say something along the lines of "You know, I've been thinking about our stage presence and how we come across to the audience. And I think it would be good to minimize reaction to any mistakes. It seems to me that calling everyone in the audience's attention to some mistake in a song only makes them think less of us as a band...."

Separate the desired behavior from "you are wrong because you do this" kind of dialog.

Let him put two and two together and see for himself how he looks to the audience. It's not about you, it's about him putting on the best show possible, all of you putting on the best show possible.

My $.02, FWIW

Worth a shot.
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Old 06-28-2010, 04:52 AM
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Pollyanna Pollyanna is offline
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Aeolian has it - straight out of Business Communications 1. "You" statements imply blame. His approach is spot on.

Of course there's still the option to punch the bastard in the face. Since you don't want to be heavy and like to keep things light, smile brightly as you do it and say "No hard feelings, mate" afterwards.

In truth, I think that if someone dissed me on stage I'd probably be embarrassed, try harder to get things right and feel a bit resentful afterwards. Just that it feels sooo good to talk tough when you're a total jellyfish :)
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  #73  
Old 06-28-2010, 05:05 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

I wonder how the people on American Idol feel when they are told that they suck on national TV?
I never watched that show or that stupid Trump, "Your Fired" show because seeing people being destroyed for no reason just doesn't do it for me.
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Old 06-28-2010, 06:42 AM
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larryace larryace is offline
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Thanks for the reminder Aoelin, You're right, how you word things can make or break. That's why I wanted email, because I'm better at the keyboard, but now I'm pressured to do it the hard way, and what was the reason for that again?

I guess I cut a lot of slack. I have a ton of patience. I try to see things from their side, maybe too much. One thing I left out...He had probably 10 Italian relatives he hasn't seen in like all these years come out to the gig and he had no idea they were going to surprise him with an unexpected gig visit. The place was intimate too, the relatives were basically right on top of him. So like I said, he is quirky, not in a bad way, just in a quirky way, and I guess it rattled him. He wanted to impress. I take into account that hey maybe someone is having a bad day and I don't bruise easy anyway. Drummers always have a certain amount of crap to absorb it seems.I didn't feel anything negative toward him, I accept that some things just push peoples buttons. I know he is a little high strung and apparently is very sensitive to drum errors.
I'll have to ask the bass player if he treated the previous drummer in a similar manner, maybe he just doesn't like me.

But right when the mistake happens, I do feel at fault because I did mess up, and even though it is unpleasant when he reacts like I described, I kinda have to laugh to myself when he freaks out. It's kind of babyish, and not even worth my time to get upset about, I have better things to do than to get dragged down by stupid baby crap. I chalk it off to high strung guitarist syndrome, no prob. Must go with the territory. But I guess last night I realized that it's happened one too many times now and I don't want him treating me like that anymore. So it's time to say something about it.
Without using the word "you".
Thanks a lot you guys I know I'm gonna blow this royal lol.
What was that reason again Bob?
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  #75  
Old 06-29-2010, 03:06 AM
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bobdadruma bobdadruma is offline
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

What is the reason?
The reason is that this issue needs closure! You need to settle this.It has affected you and you need to rectify.
As we all said, The best way to settle this so that you can get on with your life is to confront this person either by phone or in person.
If you don't do it, You will always feel a personal loss.

If you don't do it, I will! Just kidding, I owe you a dig!

Call him already! Work it out. You will probably find that he feels bad also. He just hasn't had the guts to call you. You both may have common ground.
I don't know about you but I always feel bad afterwards when someone tells me that I offended them! He will probably feel badly also and both of you can go from there.
If he doesn't, then he is a Sociopath!
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Last edited by bobdadruma; 06-29-2010 at 03:17 AM.
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  #76  
Old 06-29-2010, 03:55 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Unconditional love: is where you understand someone and their actions, and accept them as faults and love them anyways.

If I were you, I'd ask him to stop being embarrased so easily on stage, and not respecting you.
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Old 06-29-2010, 04:29 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

That it just not cool man!! But i have seen it done on a very high level and of course it has been done to me. The band that did it to me i Never played with again. Let me give you the two stories maybe it would help.

I play for Esteban and many other artitsts but when not working of course i play with local bands if I am available. Long story short I had a band call me for a gig and they had it out for me from the get go. I didn't know any of the tunes and no one on the gig helped me. Some of the songs were half time and they just said nothing so naturally I played them normal not half time. The singer ripped me a new one over the mic at least 10 times that evening. They thought it was funny. (making fun of the touring guy) To me it was awful, and embarrasing, I even thought whow I have been doing the same gig for so long I can't play a bar gig anymore. Yea, they thought it was funny "I cried on the way home" Then the next day I got a call from a drummer friend of mine and he let me in on everything. They did it all on purpose. Guess it was a joke to them, but it sure as hell wasent funny to me. Never played with them again.

A few years back I went to see Jeff Beck because Bozzio was playing drums. BB King opened up for him. I don't know who the drummer was but in the middle of a tune BB stopped the band. He looked back at the drummer and said "I'm old man, don't rush me"
Then re-started the tune. This is at the Dodge Theatre infront of thousands of people. Everyone in the audience laughed, but man I didn't . I felt so bad for that drummer.

The stage is not the place for that stuff. I would say something for sure. I'm sure the guitar player makes way more mistakes than you do. It always the guys that make the most mistakes that do the complaining.
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Old 06-29-2010, 06:40 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

usually when somebody in my band screws up we give them this look like they are "high" (on drugs) sometimes if a hand is free somebody will pretend to be hitting a joint. it's kind of funny but it works the same as a negative reinforcement. Nobody wants to get the joint.

we also have this song that we NEVER play "niteclub" by old 97's but if somebody isn't ready or back from a break fast enough or finished tuning we will hit the first two chords and let them ring out. If they don't get it together in time we will actually play the song and it's kind of funny because we all hate the song. just an inside joke.

I've only been yelled at a few times on stage and 99% of the time it's a miscommunication. Guitar player says to me "slow down" and of course I can't hear over the drums and lip read "you are slowing down" so I start to speed up. little stuff like that.

The only time I've really gotten yelled at on stage was me and the bass player rushed a song and it was more of a "shame on you two" kind of thing. Like we should both know better to keep each other in check.
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Old 06-29-2010, 09:28 AM
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Yea those mis reads get me too. Sometimes I can't hear what someone is saying or signaling so I try and guess. I'm pretty good most of the time but not all. There should be a standardized musicians sign language.

1 finger held up = slow down!
2 fingers = speed up!
3 fingers = you're too loud!
4 fingers = play louder dammit!
5 fingers = quit stepping on everyone!

I would find that refreshingly helpful
The baseball guys have their own thing, so should musicians, right?
We can't always converse with one another easily from a distance.
Texting is probably out of the question...
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Old 06-29-2010, 10:27 AM
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Pollyanna Pollyanna is offline
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Default Re: Getting "yelled" at onstage

Quote:
Originally Posted by mcbike View Post
I've only been yelled at a few times on stage and 99% of the time it's a miscommunication. Guitar player says to me "slow down" and of course I can't hear over the drums and lip read "you are slowing down" so I start to speed up. little stuff like that.
Haha, I relate to that. The other night we were working on a new song that comes to a natural stop at the end of each progression. Our singer decided he wanted us to keep going the third time and shouted to me "Don't stop!".

I just heard "Stop" and obeyed, with predictable musical results. Maybe some agreed verbal signals? Slow! = slow down. Fast! = speed up. Stop! = stop. Keep going! = don't stop. Larry, I just know I'd get confused by finger signals lol

I like the joint method of chastisement, McBike. In my band it's either a smile, a laugh, or a panicked look :)
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Last edited by Pollyanna; 06-29-2010 at 02:55 PM.
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