SO what annoys you? (The so is on purpose)

I'm such a grumpy luddite :) Here goes : -

1) The current fad with technology, phones, FB, etc. Its so dull (and I'm a software engineer.. maybe it is dull when you know how it all works).
2) Lack of humility.
3) Sensationalism.
4) "OMG I got so drunk last night"... like its some big achievement.
5) Loud people, and people who talk too much. Often it seems the size of someones brain is inversely proportional to the size of their mouths.
6) Dumbing down (see: most TV programs, and peoples interests / hobbies replaced by said TV).
7) Target driven society (people get good at reaching targets, not good at their job).
8) Out with friends.. photo gets taken.. "Oh I must put that on FB!".
9) Narcissism (see 1, 8).
10) Disappearance decorum and elegance from society.
11) Modern attitudes in general (see 1, 2, 4, 6, 8, 9, 10).

I am trying to mellow out.. honest ;-)
 
I have this brilliant idea but I don't know how to execute it. It could make me a bazillionaire but I'm stuck with the details. That is SO annoying.

Anyway, I'll let you in on it. First, it is no secret that the diet industry is huge. We're talking billions of dollars per year. There's all manner of stuff out there. The thing is, none of it is particularly effective. No one has really been able to come up with something that will really reduce a person's cravings for food.

So I got to thinking. They have patches for everything nowadays. Patches for smokers, patches to dispense meds, patches for birth control, you name it. My idea is a patch that makes you taste chocolate. You slap on the patch and suddenly you feel like you're eating chocolate. Almost everybody loves chocolate and we know that there are certain "feel good" chemical signals that are sent to the brain when you eat it. It seems to me that we could release those chemical messengers with the patch and at the same time, release other chemicals that will trick your taste buds into thinking you're eating chocolate. But no calories! You eat dinner and want a dessert- slap on a patch and you feel like you're eating fudge brownies! Leave it on for an hour and you'll feel like you've totally pigged out on chocolate cake and you won't want to eat anything for the rest of the evening! Brilliant!

And there's no stopping there! We could make different flavors: Vanilla Patch, Strawberry Patch (perfect name), etc. Heck, we could even do regional favorites and offer Deep Fried Twinkie Patch (with or without bacony flavor). The only possible problem that I foresee is that some people are going to spread patches all over their bodies and wind up in some manner of chocolate-induced coma, let's call it a Chocoma. An appropriate warning label would minimize our liability.

Do you think I should make a Kickstarter for this?
 
JimFiore said:
I have this brilliant idea but I don't know how to execute it. It could make me a bazillionaire but I'm stuck with the details. That is SO annoying.

Anyway, I'll let you in on it. First, it is no secret that the diet industry is huge. We're talking billions of dollars per year. There's all manner of stuff out there. The thing is, none of it is particularly effective. No one has really been able to come up with something that will really reduce a person's cravings for food.

So I got to thinking. They have patches for everything nowadays. Patches for smokers, patches to dispense meds, patches for birth control, you name it. My idea is a patch that makes you taste chocolate. You slap on the patch and suddenly you feel like you're eating chocolate. Almost everybody loves chocolate and we know that there are certain "feel good" chemical signals that are sent to the brain when you eat it. It seems to me that we could release those chemical messengers with the patch and at the same time, release other chemicals that will trick your taste buds into thinking you're eating chocolate. But no calories! You eat dinner and want a dessert- slap on a patch and you feel like you're eating fudge brownies! Leave it on for an hour and you'll feel like you've totally pigged out on chocolate cake and you won't want to eat anything for the rest of the evening! Brilliant!

And there's no stopping there! We could make different flavors: Vanilla Patch, Strawberry Patch (perfect name), etc. Heck, we could even do regional favorites and offer Deep Fried Twinkie Patch (with or without bacony flavor). The only possible problem that I foresee is that some people are going to spread patches all over their bodies and wind up in some manner of chocolate-induced coma, let's call it a Chocoma. An appropriate warning label would minimize our liability.

Do you think I should make a Kickstarter for this?
Click to expand...

Hell, we could just stimulate everyone's dopamine receptors by giving them heroin. I, for one, think this is a much easier solution!

My annoyance? Dodgy drains. I've been having problems with the plumbing in my flat. It all started when my sink in the kitchen started backing up and as the sink is connected to the washing machine, whenever I ran the washing machine - it flooded the kitchen. A plumber comes in, fixes a few things (including a chronic leak) and it's fine. Then it backs up again.

I go and buy 91% Sulphuric Acid from the hardware shop, shove it down the drain et voilá! Clean flow.

Now my bathroom is playing up, so I've been using the same stuff from the hardware store. Let's see how that goes.

The kicker is this though. I've been clearing out my flat, which involves moving a lot of stuff from my living room into the cellar. I go into the cellar (directly under the kitchen) and there's a sodding great leak in the ceiling. It may have been there for a couple of weeks because I haven't been down there since then. Plumber has been called again, de-humidifier working overtime and I'm going to have to commit genocide against whichever moulds, spores and fungi are now in residence.
 
Jim if they can sell a pet rock, I'm sure this would sell....if it works like you think it will

You are assuming you can activate your taste buds through a skin patch. I have heard that if you put garlic clove on your bare feet in a shoe, you can taste garlic in a short amount of time. I never really tried that, so maybe it is possible.

I'm sure there are plenty of weak willed people who will go for it in a big way. If you could make a skin patch that induces a satiated feeling in your tummy, that would help too. A growling stomach would make people eat the chocolate skin patch. You'd have to design it so it can be consumed for the feeble minded.

Sounds expensive to develop and test.
 
BacteriumFendYoke said:
I go and buy 91% Sulphuric Acid from the hardware shop, shove it down the drain et voilá! Clean flow.

Now my bathroom is playing up, so I've been using the same stuff from the hardware store. Let's see how that goes.

I go into the cellar (directly under the kitchen) and there's a sodding great leak in the ceiling. It may have been there for a couple of weeks because I haven't been down there since then.
Click to expand...

I see what you did here.

Obviously, you can't buy 91% sulfuric acid from just any hardware shop, therefore, you must be a terrorist. The "plumbers" will be around to fix the "leak" shortly.
 
Ooo, I like the little warning icon that shows it eating a chunk out of a hand.

Terrorist.
 
JimFiore said:
I have this brilliant idea but I don't know how to execute it. It could make me a bazillionaire but I'm stuck with the details. That is SO annoying.

Anyway, I'll let you in on it. First, it is no secret that the diet industry is huge. We're talking billions of dollars per year. There's all manner of stuff out there. The thing is, none of it is particularly effective. No one has really been able to come up with something that will really reduce a person's cravings for food.

So I got to thinking. They have patches for everything nowadays. Patches for smokers, patches to dispense meds, patches for birth control, you name it. My idea is a patch that makes you taste chocolate. You slap on the patch and suddenly you feel like you're eating chocolate. Almost everybody loves chocolate and we know that there are certain "feel good" chemical signals that are sent to the brain when you eat it. It seems to me that we could release those chemical messengers with the patch and at the same time, release other chemicals that will trick your taste buds into thinking you're eating chocolate. But no calories! You eat dinner and want a dessert- slap on a patch and you feel like you're eating fudge brownies! Leave it on for an hour and you'll feel like you've totally pigged out on chocolate cake and you won't want to eat anything for the rest of the evening! Brilliant!

And there's no stopping there! We could make different flavors: Vanilla Patch, Strawberry Patch (perfect name), etc. Heck, we could even do regional favorites and offer Deep Fried Twinkie Patch (with or without bacony flavor). The only possible problem that I foresee is that some people are going to spread patches all over their bodies and wind up in some manner of chocolate-induced coma, let's call it a Chocoma. An appropriate warning label would minimize our liability.

Do you think I should make a Kickstarter for this?
Click to expand...

Firstly, I think Willy Wonka deserves at least a little credit, here. In fact, he had bubble-gum which delivered a full dinner of several courses.

I think if you were a large person, you might almost have to spread patches all over your body to stimulate the same feeling and sustain of the feeling that one such person might crave. Dosage might get iffy, in other words. Though I am having happy thoughts about the "pizza patch" being both round, and segmented pizza-style for easy pizza dosing.
 
BacteriumFendYoke said:
If I get a knock on the door from men in ill-fitting suits (this will be the British government after all, they can only get their suits from Primark) then I'm firmly placing the blame on you two specimens.
Click to expand...

Good morning, sir. I understand that you have a 91% sulphuric acid solution on your premesis. I'm afraid we will need to confiscate this item and somehow represent it as a threat to distract people from the budget. I'm sorry sir, but you will need to find another way of clearing your drains. May I suggest vinegar and baking soda? At this stage these items are not on the banned list.

Yes sir, we are already aware of your alien and Austrian friends. Have a good day, sir.
 
Dr_Watso said:
I think if you were a large person, you might almost have to spread patches all over your body to stimulate the same feeling and sustain of the feeling that one such person might crave. Dosage might get iffy, in other words. Though I am having happy thoughts about the "pizza patch" being both round, and segmented pizza-style for easy pizza dosing.
Click to expand...

Perhaps, but a large person doesn't necessarily stuff more chocolate in their mouth in order to taste it. There will need to be tests with volunteers no doubt.

I like the phrase "easy pizza dosing". In fact, "easy <insert food name here> dosing" is a lovely phrase in general. I am stealing it for my own humorous uses.
 
JimFiore said:
Perhaps, but a large person doesn't necessarily stuff more chocolate in their mouth in order to taste it. There will need to be tests with volunteers no doubt.

I like the phrase "easy pizza dosing". In fact, "easy <insert food name here> dosing" is a lovely phrase in general. I am stealing it for my own humorous uses.
Click to expand...

Unfortunately, I happen to remember that it's in fact not all that difficult to over-dose on pizza and suffer the morning consequences of too many processed/preserved meats and too much cheese. While we're on the subject, I think PFOG might like a patch that delivers the smooth cool taste of Fosters "beer".
 
BacteriumFendYoke said:
If I get a knock on the door from men in ill-fitting suits (this will be the British government after all, they can only get their suits from Primark) then I'm firmly placing the blame on you two specimens.
Click to expand...

All British suits are ill-fitting. In the name of "fashion" as I understand it. And it's crossed over here, so now we see fat americans trying to wear the skinny euro styles.
 
Dr_Watso said:
All British suits are ill-fitting. In the name of "fashion" as I understand it. And it's crossed over here, so now we see fat americans trying to wear the skinny euro styles.
Click to expand...

Even if I were skinny (a big IF - I used to be, mind) I couldn't wear 'skinny' style anything. It just doesn't fit.

I have ill-fitting suits but that's only because I can't afford a decent one that fits and I keep losing weight...
 
Mark_S said:
I'm such a grumpy luddite :) Here goes : -

1) The current fad with technology, phones, FB, etc. Its so dull (and I'm a software engineer.. maybe it is dull when you know how it all works).
2) Lack of humility.
3) Sensationalism.
4) "OMG I got so drunk last night"... like its some big achievement.
5) Loud people, and people who talk too much. Often it seems the size of someones brain is inversely proportional to the size of their mouths.
6) Dumbing down (see: most TV programs, and peoples interests / hobbies replaced by said TV).
7) Target driven society (people get good at reaching targets, not good at their job).
8) Out with friends.. photo gets taken.. "Oh I must put that on FB!".
9) Narcissism (see 1, 8).
10) Disappearance decorum and elegance from society.
11) Modern attitudes in general (see 1, 2, 4, 6, 8, 9, 10).

I am trying to mellow out.. honest ;-)
Click to expand...

You might be a Neil Postman fan.

What kind of software engineer thinks social media and phones is a fad?? You write in Fortran too?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top