How do you justify expenditures?

Chollyred

Chollyred

Senior Member
Just getting back into drumming after many years' layoff. Bought a cheap used kit from a guy for less than $100 with the <ahem> idea of teaching my kids to play. Of course now that I've got them, I want to upgrade, upgrade, upgrade....It absolutely needs new heads. I don't like the cymbals (Sabian Pro Studio and Zildjian Scimitars). Amazingly, the cheap no-name bass pedal functions well...

How do you justify to a spouse, parent, or significant other, that you just need to spend twice what you paid for the entire set to upgrade 1 cymbal? Much less that you need to upgrade a lot of other stuff too?
 
My wife's scrapbooking puchases warrant retaliation with drum related purchases. We keep each other in check.
 
Chollyred said:
Just getting back into drumming after many years' layoff. Bought a cheap used kit from a guy for less than $100 with the <ahem> idea of teaching my kids to play. Of course now that I've got them, I want to upgrade, upgrade, upgrade....It absolutely needs new heads. I don't like the cymbals (Sabian Pro Studio and Zildjian Scimitars). Amazingly, the cheap no-name bass pedal functions well...

How do you justify to a spouse, parent, or significant other, that you just need to spend twice what you paid for the entire set to upgrade 1 cymbal? Much less that you need to upgrade a lot of other stuff too?
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There will be some people who never understand. I'm almost 28 years old, play professionally, make my living doing this, and I STILL get crap from my mother and grandmother about wasting time and money on this useless thing called drumming!

With that said, I think it is important to be honest. Explain to your spouse, etc, that you are really into this hobby, and need to upgrade. With that said, it is a good idea to put in a lot of time first. Make sure that playing is a passion for you again (as opposed to just wanting the new gear to have the new gear), and make sure that the people in your life can see that it's a passion for you. That makes it easier to swallow the cost for them.
 
Very civil solution is to sit down with your spouse and iron out a 6-month and 12-month budget. First, save 3 month's combined salary/ wages and put it into a do-not-touch account for emergencies: ie- your refrigerator breaks down, your transmission in your car breaks down, one of you get laid off from work, your kid breaks a leg falling out of a treehouse. Next, put 10% into savings, religiously every month for kid's college/ retirement. Next, work out your monthly budget, factoring in all of your monthly mortgage or rent/ car payment/ credit card bills/ groceries/ insurance/ utilities. Whatever is left over is your "disposable income". Now prioritize that portion of your incomes together. What's most important for your family should come first, then your spouse, and then , finally, you. If you're asking for justification for buying something that you "don't need" first make sure that you have everything that you "do need". Now, if you have a big nest egg that your sitting on, by all means, get some good stuff. But save some money and buy used. We keep hearing on the news horror stories about people getting railroaded in today's economy, they're living paycheck to paycheck with nothing to fall back on and when they get laid off, they immediately fall into the poor house. Always have a backup to fall back on, your cymbals won't help you if one of those aforementioned emergencies happens.
 
There's a difference between "want" and "need". Explain that you are interested in getting some better/upgraded equipment because you WANT to pursue this hobby you love. If she/they don't understand, then you'll probably have to negotiate or budget or barter or just plain beg.

As for me, my wife doesn't know much about what I buy/sell anymore. She knows I'm not gear-hungry (hee hee) and that I'm purchasing tools "needed" for my job. It works for us. I just try to make sure we make ends meet every month...
 
To me, this is NOT a hobby, it is part of the way I earn my living. With earning a living comes WRITE OFFS. Get a tax guy that understands where you can and can't write things off. Equipment has a value that can be written off, just as a business that needs a truck can write THAT off.

It's more complex than that, but there are things you can save money on, and equipment is one of them.
 
If I have to ask my woman how to spend my own money, I'm with the wrong woman.
 
I just keep the conversation going 24/7 on what I need and my wife eventually throws the check book at me. One of these days it will be divorce papers, I will deal with that when the time comes.
 
Rick_Strong said:
I just keep the conversation going 24/7 on what I need and my wife eventually throws the check book at me. One of these days it will be divorce papers, I will deal with that when the time comes.
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The last part of your sentence is just not funny at all. Just for your information.

I am very reluctant of buying new gear. I began to take lessons this month, and that costs more then enough to keep me from wanting new cymbals. There is simply no money for that.
 
When drumming brings in more than I spend on gear, everything seems to be fine. In addition, I prefer to buy everything (except striking implements...) second hand, so in effect my purchases become investments.
 
Steady Freddy said:
If I have to ask my woman how to spend my own money, I'm with the wrong woman.
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Man, you must be single!

For me, at this point, it is just a hobby. Unfortunately, all of my hobbies can get rather expensive. I'll keep niggling away and searching eBay and pawn shops and eventually find what I want at a price she won't scream about. It's all about patience.

Was playing around last night. I swear that Sabian Pro Studio crash is just plain too thick! It makes a good small ride. Good ping and sustain. As a crash, it's just too much for my style of playing. I'd rather have a decent 14" - 16" thin crash.

The Scimitar hats aren't great either. A little thick and clangy. Would just replacing the top make sense? How much does the bottom contribute to the overall sound? I've seen some decent deals on a couple of single tops online, but replacing both would be a budget breaker roght now.

The Scimitar ride will have to go too, but it may be awhile on that one.
 
The first thing I have to do, is really justify the expense to myself. A couple years ago I'd go carelessly hog wild and go through cymbals, snares and accessories like water.

I am at the point in life where I am going to keep what I use, and not have a stock of extra toys. I can't justify it now.

At the same time, I carefully chose what I could afford, mostly new, a few used items that would not break the bank.

I bought a whole set of gently used A- customs for $700. Thats: 14/16/18 crash, 12" china, 14" mastersound hats and a 16" china. I could have paid for new, but there is no point given this deal. Would I like Paiste sigs instead? sure! But I am not wafting out $4,000.

That being said, I won't wallow in substandard stuff. I know from experience that if I got a snare or cymbal that was "just because" and not a top shelf performer, I'd end up spending more down the road to upgrade.

So I ask myself:
- Do I really need this? (and how soon?)
- Will something work just as well for less money?
- Is it really a need or just a want?

If I can convince myself to part with the cash, I won't be able to justify it to anyone else.
 
As long as my bills are paid and I'm saving I can buy drum related items. I'm not married so technically I don't have to justify anything but having a live-in girlfriend is not exactly being single. I provide many things for her so I've cut back on spending. Normally I just buy the stuff without telling her and then don't tell her how much if costs. For those who are married that must be a challenge in some ways. Once I'm married I'm pretty much screwed haha and I have enough stuff. Wait....no I don't!!!
 
I don't smoke and gave up drinking. This gives me an extra couple hundred a month to put on the credit card. Come to think of it, I now need to go check my watched items list on E-bay !
 
Chollyred said:
The Scimitar ride will have to go too, but it may be awhile on that one.
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I actually didn't mind the Scimitar ride, I was upset when it was "lost / reposesed / stolen", (was replaced with a 70's Zildjian, is all good).

I feel as though I'm in the same boat as Steady Freddy, if the women doesn't understand my need for gear, she's not the right one. Currently been living with "the right one" for almost 2 years, we have no kids, no mortgage, no car payments. She makes quite a bit more than I, so as long as I'm covering my share of the bills, she doesn't mind. She herself just bought a midi keyboard which she's used all of twice in the past month, she knows about the GAS.
 
The bottom line is can you afford it.

After you pay your bills, and put something away for retirement and emergency fund, is there anything left over to save? If so, save it.

Have the conversation with your wife to show the necessities are covered and that you want to save to make your purchases.

Good luck.

RJVSMB
 
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