It's not black and white like that to me. I'm of the mind that whatever comes out that night, that's what you get, oh well. There's no taking it back lol. If I'm feeling bad, playing music is the antidote. Sometimes I do admit I just feel off, but that's all part of this human experience we're all having. If it's any consolation, nights where I felt off or just strange...the recording came out better than I was expecting. Most crap exists in a person's head. That's why I record everything, to compare how I felt with how it came out.
I always try to do my best when playing. Playing drums in public is the only real chance I get to use my skills.....that I pour so much time, money and energy into. I do live for the live gig. So yea, I play for the music. If the people are into it, even better. But it's not a requirement. There's no denying that an audience involved in a band's show can push that band to greater places. But I'm lucky to be able to play with the band I'm in, because the leader is just my musical hero. So any chance to play with him is a treat for me.
We use a sax player on gigs that pay more, and this guy can be really great or just meh, and everywhere in between. It's all about the ratio of guys to girls. If it's all girls, the guy is friggin great. Really friggin great to listen to. If it's all guys, he's a snore. That to me sucks. He has no musical responsibility, he just rolls over the entire road we lay for him. The least he could do is "bring it" when he does a solo....even if it's all guys.
Don't sweat it. 95% of it is in your head and only you feel it.