DRUMMERWORLD OFFICIAL DISCUSSION FORUM   

Go Back   DRUMMERWORLD OFFICIAL DISCUSSION FORUM > General Discussion

General Discussion General discussion forum for all drum related topics. Use this forum to exchange ideas and information with your fellow drummers.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  #1  
Old 02-02-2015, 08:18 PM
rogue_drummer's Avatar
rogue_drummer rogue_drummer is offline
Gold Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Fort Worth
Posts: 1,366
Default Band Frustrations + 1

Ditto on the band frustrations. Although instead of getting all mad and wrapped around the axle about it, I now am starting to find it somewhat amuzing and actually looking at it as: "it is what it is."

Let me explain: around May/June of last year I auditioned with a classic rock and blues band and won the chair after they fired their previous drummer, who they claim, wouldn't commit to gigs. Which is kinda surprising since it was revealed several months later that they only had 1 gig lined up with him but had to cancel since he flaked out a day or so before.

Fast forward to last December. Around the 2nd week of December we all decided to break for the holidays since everyone had family coming in, holiday parties to attend, decorations to put up...the usual Christmas and holiday chores.

All well and good, right? No biggie. Well...now it is turning into a biggie. We can't seem to get back together! It's almost been 2 months since we practiced and either someone can't rehearse on the weekends due to (insert item here), so we try for the next weekend, which turns out to be a copy of the previous weekend. Now it appears our wonderful and cheerful keys player is AWOL. It should be noted here that he is a professional peace officer, but he hasn't made contact with us in a month or so.

So...as our bass player said in a "reply all" email last week, we need to either poop or get off the pooper. It's like we're stuck in the space/time continuum and can't move forward.... These are all good musicos and a wild and friendly bunch, so I don't wish to burn any bridges. But dang, my early 1990's Vintage Emrald Green Tama Rockstar kit is over at our guitar player's house in his rehearsal studio. I kinda wanna go get it but not if we are going to pick back up and start rehearsing again since we all know loading and unloading a drum kit is a pain.

To add insult to injury, this is a perfect time to beat the streets and get us some gigs, but I'm not moving until we start rehearsing again. And if we fold, it's okay. I learned a bunch and we had a lot of good laughs and we drank some good booze, but just let me know one way or the other.

I feel like putting an ad in the newspaper that says "orphaned drummer needs a good home...." Ha!
__________________
I don't aim to be the best, just the best looking.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 02-02-2015, 08:47 PM
Hollywood Jim's Avatar
Hollywood Jim Hollywood Jim is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Posts: 3,806
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Sounds interesting !!

Never ever burn a bridge in the music business (hobby). Playing music with others is all about bridges. New bridges and old bridges.

Forming bands and keeping them together is always difficult. Unless you get lucky and find a group of people with the right attitude, talent and life style.


.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 02-02-2015, 09:01 PM
mmulcahy1's Avatar
mmulcahy1 mmulcahy1 is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA
Posts: 2,043
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Quote:
Originally Posted by rogue_drummer View Post
I feel like putting an ad in the newspaper that says "orphaned drummer needs a good home...." Ha!
I like that. Can I steal it?
__________________
Gretsch Catalina Maple Drums / Ludwig Supraphonic Snare Drum / Paiste Giant Beat & 2oo2 Cymbals
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 02-02-2015, 09:11 PM
opentune's Avatar
opentune opentune is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 6,094
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Apathy reigns in hobby bands. I say after 2 months, it's clear and simple. You just gotta JAB (Join Another Band).

My 'classic rock' band fell into inactivity over last summer. By summers end I joined a blues band which rehearses weekly to fill in the space. When classic rock band members found out .... they never flinched ..not a word... nobody cares! We still rehearse every month ...or three.
__________________
Louis
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 02-02-2015, 09:25 PM
New Tricks New Tricks is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: AZ
Posts: 2,036
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Quote:
I now am starting to find it somewhat amuzing and actually looking at it as: "it is what it is."
That my friend, in every aspect, is the key to a happy life.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 02-02-2015, 09:35 PM
Midnite Zephyr's Avatar
Midnite Zephyr Midnite Zephyr is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Surf City, USA
Posts: 6,155
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

I hear you, man. My originals jam band has been on hiatus since the middle of December. I'm not playing enough now during the week. We kept this jam band going for the simple sake of getting better at our respective instruments, so it's not that big of a deal to not jam with them. But I feel like I ain't getting better now for obvious reasons.

I'm starting to look in C/L again, but we haven't really disbanded. Luckily, I have my covers band to still play with once per week, and I do gigs with that bands.
__________________
Drumming for fun.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 02-02-2015, 09:38 PM
rogue_drummer's Avatar
rogue_drummer rogue_drummer is offline
Gold Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Fort Worth
Posts: 1,366
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

I like that. Can I steal it?


Flattery will get you far in life mmulcahy1! Be my guest! Haha!
__________________
I don't aim to be the best, just the best looking.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 02-03-2015, 12:31 AM
Magenta's Avatar
Magenta Magenta is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Gwlad Cymru
Posts: 3,208
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Similar story here. We last gigged in October, and I think we've all played together twice since then. Funnily enough, as of ten minutes ago, we're firming up arrangements for a rehearsal. I can't even remember what songs we do.
__________________
Thinly veiled angel

Ladies & gentlemen, I've suffered for my art. Now it's your turn (Neil Innes)
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 02-03-2015, 01:14 AM
DrumEatDrum's Avatar
DrumEatDrum DrumEatDrum is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 9,368
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Unforteuntly, the older I get, the more common this is.

When I was a 20-something, the band always came first, everything else was a distant 2nd.

At 40-something, with wife/kids/house/mortgage, everyone's priorities are certainly different, including mine.

My last real band never broke up, life just kept getting in the way. Babies, marriages, funerals, someone always had a very legit reason to put off getting together, and next thing you know it's years later.

I had another little informal blues band, but people kept having to cancel last minute, take a week off for this or that, and it just faded away.

It's hard to find people to still have the fire to do something, yet can be flexible enough to also deal with the other aspects life throws at you.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 02-03-2015, 04:34 AM
Nancy_C's Avatar
Nancy_C Nancy_C is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Oahu, Hawaii, USA
Posts: 245
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Quote:
Originally Posted by New Tricks View Post
That my friend, in every aspect, is the key to a happy life.
There is no phrase more meaningless. It is, at once, a symptom of apathy and an excuse not to act.

It's even worse than, "Let's agree to disagree" -- another say-nothing remark.

The pseudo-Buddhist inflection is appealing, sure, but if "it is what it is," then what's the point in trying to change?

Instead, how about: "It is what it mustn't be; therefore, I will act!"
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 02-03-2015, 04:55 AM
JustJames's Avatar
JustJames JustJames is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Sydney Australia
Posts: 2,997
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Seems to me that the key is to have a reason to rehearse. And that means gigs. Even if they are low key, backyard gigs, the prospect of playing in front of others improves a band no end.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 02-03-2015, 08:19 AM
rogue_drummer's Avatar
rogue_drummer rogue_drummer is offline
Gold Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Fort Worth
Posts: 1,366
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

The way this band rolls is rehearse, rehearse, rehearse, then when everyone has a warm fuzzy feeling about our entire catalog of covers, get some gigs.

I've already cancelled one afternoon audition for our band to play Saturday evenings at a restaurant/bar in a rotation of bands because 2 of our members got cold feet about not having each and every song down and polished 100%. And this gig actually paid decent wages for bands and everyone got home before midnight! We had every song at about 95%, with very minor things to iron out. When you think about it, unless you were in rehearsals or part of the original band or production crew, nobody would notice the subtle differences between our version and the radio version.

At the next rehearsal they apologized to the hilt about not "being ready" but still...my name was attached to the band as I was "their booking rep" according to the venue and we did cancel. As I recall I had to come up with some off-the-wall excuse about needing to cancel, like a band member had a family emergency or something like that.

If I got us some gigs on down the line, there is no guarantee we'd make them and I'd end up cancelling.

If these guys just want to get together and jam once a week I'm good with that since these guys are good. But I am also of the opinion we need to either get serious about really gigging or acknowledge we are just a "jam to have fun jamming" band that plays the occasional friend's backyard birthday party and get paid in beer and food and eye candy (hint hint)....
__________________
I don't aim to be the best, just the best looking.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 02-03-2015, 08:30 AM
keep it simple's Avatar
keep it simple keep it simple is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 20,836
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Quote:
Originally Posted by rogue_drummer View Post
I am also of the opinion we need to either get serious about really gigging or acknowledge we are just a "jam to have fun jamming" band that plays the occasional friend's backyard birthday party and get paid in beer and food and eye candy (hint hint)....
I think they need to be told exactly that!

I'm with you on these kind of two speed band member frustrations, but thankfully, not the 100% gig ready variety. Apart from being fun, & as long as the song isn't too raw, gigs are the best way to polish a song
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 02-03-2015, 06:53 PM
drumming sort of person's Avatar
drumming sort of person drumming sort of person is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 2,479
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Quote:
Originally Posted by rogue_drummer View Post
my early 1990's Vintage Emrald Green Tama Rockstar kit is over at our guitar player's house in his rehearsal studio. I kinda wanna go get it but not if we are going to pick back up and start rehearsing again since we all know loading and unloading a drum kit is a pain.
If loading and unloading a set of drums is a pain, you should probably consider learning another instrument. Clarinet perhaps? Otherwise, go get your drums and take them home, or somewhere where you can play them and practice.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 02-03-2015, 07:22 PM
rogue_drummer's Avatar
rogue_drummer rogue_drummer is offline
Gold Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Fort Worth
Posts: 1,366
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

... go get your drums and take them home, or somewhere where you can play them and practice.


It's one of several playable kits I have...usually my gigging kit. My luddies don't leave the house yet.
__________________
I don't aim to be the best, just the best looking.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 02-03-2015, 09:21 PM
New Tricks New Tricks is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: AZ
Posts: 2,036
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nancy_C View Post
The pseudo-Buddhist inflection is appealing, sure, but if "it is what it is," then what's the point in trying to change?
There is no point in trying to change other people. You can't set an example and encourage them to see things your way but, people are different personalities and priorities.

Here is some more pseudo-Buddhism for you.

Learn to recognize and accept the things we cannot change.

We (should) have control over our own actions and that's about it. If you have bandmates that don't share your work ethic, it's very unlikely that you will change it.

In a group scenario, you factor in the pros and cons and make your decision to accept it and stay or accept it and leave. Either decision starts with acceptance.
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 02-03-2015, 09:39 PM
larryace's Avatar
larryace larryace is online now
"Uncle Larry"
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: In beautiful Bucks County, PA
Posts: 20,754
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

If the Energizer bunny and a Die Hard battery had a child, that would be you Rouge.

My continued condolences for the people you have to deal with on a regular basis. And when you take your drums from a rehearsal spot, it is a big statement.

Actually if I were to offer my unsolicited advice from a couple thousand miles away...and only because you seem to enjoy the company of the others...plus you said they are good musicians...and as a last ditch attempt to not toss out any work you guys have put in already...

I'd say get a gig, any gig. Almost as a test to see how bad the other guys want to play out. If they are lukewarm about playing out...from what I think I know about you...I think that you'd would rather put your energies into an outfit that gigged out regularly.

IMO, it's vital for a bands health to gig and listen to gig recordings, separately, or better yet as a band. That's where you really learn stuff. Too much rehearsal and not enough gigs....IMO....is not a good thing. That's probably not a popular opinion and doesn't take into account the singers need to practice their thing especially if there are harmonies.

But it's better to gig and it not be perfect than to not gig IMO. As long as it wouldn't be a trainwreck, I'd say book a gig. But you said you didn't want to without more rehearsal, and it's the only point I'm not in completely on board with...but you know what's best.
__________________
Levis/Hanes/Timberlands/Custom made socks
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 02-06-2015, 01:19 AM
rogue_drummer's Avatar
rogue_drummer rogue_drummer is offline
Gold Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Fort Worth
Posts: 1,366
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

If the Energizer bunny and a Die Hard battery had a child....

Haha! Good one LarryAce!! I may have to change my avatar!

Thank you for your kind words. You're right, as a last ditch effot to salvage the time and effort we already put into it, I'm going to see what kind of gig I can come up with, even if it's someone's birthday party, it would be worth it just to play out as a band in front of people. We have about 3 hours of material we just need to run thru once or twice and we're good to go.

The only unknown variable right now is our piano/organ player. He's still AWOL. We haven't heard hide nor hair of him even though we've reached out.
__________________
I don't aim to be the best, just the best looking.
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 02-06-2015, 01:29 AM
opentune's Avatar
opentune opentune is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 6,094
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Quote:
Originally Posted by rogue_drummer View Post
[i]
The only unknown variable right now is our piano/organ player. He's still AWOL. We haven't heard hide nor hair of him even though we've reached out.
In my view, in a world of such quick and easy e-communication, his inaction means he is either 6 feet under, or simply no longer interested. I'd move on.
__________________
Louis
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 02-06-2015, 02:01 AM
MaryO2's Avatar
MaryO2 MaryO2 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Cincinnati
Posts: 75
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

I so feel your pain. I've been going through the same thing for a year now. It's only been of the last 6 weeks or so that we seem to finally have a line up together in which we all want to get together weekly. But...I've learned to not hold my breath.
__________________
"She's mad but she's magic. There's no lie in her fire."
Charles Bukowski
Reply With Quote
  #21  
Old 02-06-2015, 03:02 PM
mikel mikel is offline
Platinum Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Midlands. England.
Posts: 2,266
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1

Quote:
Originally Posted by New Tricks View Post
There is no point in trying to change other people. You can't set an example and encourage them to see things your way but, people are different personalities and priorities.

Here is some more pseudo-Buddhism for you.

Learn to recognize and accept the things we cannot change.

We (should) have control over our own actions and that's about it. If you have bandmates that don't share your work ethic, it's very unlikely that you will change it.

In a group scenario, you factor in the pros and cons and make your decision to accept it and stay or accept it and leave. Either decision starts with acceptance.
No...you can change it. You as a band member are part of the scenario, you can give the other band members an ultimatum, such as, "We are booking a gig 2 months from now, so we need to be ready" They can accept that, or leave. That is positive action. Or you can tell them you realy want to gig, are they up for it? If they are not, you leave and find a band that is up for it. That is also positive action and in both cases you have changed things.

If you are personaly involved in a situation then you have some control over it. There are some things we cant change, and feel better if we accept that, but a band situation is not one of them.
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 02-09-2015, 10:53 PM
rogue_drummer's Avatar
rogue_drummer rogue_drummer is offline
Gold Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Fort Worth
Posts: 1,366
Default Re: Band Frustrations + 1 (we still have a band)

I'm glad to report back in, we actually managed a rehearsal Saturday evening!

The wife and I were out running errands Saturday afternoon and I got the text from our bass player asking if I'm available to practice around 6:30ish....

To make a long story short, our keys player who was AWOL offered up his apologies for not making contact. He's a police officer and has been working lately for a small town in Texas with a police force of 4 officers and a chief. The city needed all these guys to work a lot of overtime and he has been working almost non-stop since early December.

Before we played a note, our guitar player's wife made magaritas, so we sorta got the liquid encouragement going first, which helped a bunch to loosen up.

We didn't sound too bad after a 2 month break. Our intros and outros were rusty but the songs themselves weren't bad. Everyone was enthusiastic.

And I did well using matched grip instead of traditional. It seemed like I was looser and it was easier to get around the kit.
__________________
I don't aim to be the best, just the best looking.
Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are Off
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off




All times are GMT +2. The time now is 12:48 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.0
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Bernhard Castiglioni's DRUMMERWORLD.com