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  #41  
Old 02-01-2013, 12:30 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

My parents were always supportive and rightfully believed that being involved with any of the
arts would improve your quality of life. We had a german shepherd that would walk over in front
of the bass drum when I was done playing and softly swish his tail into the drum for 5 - 10 minutes
as if showing me how to coax a better tone from it! He did that for years. We loved hearing him play
the bass drum! There were artists and musicians on both sides of my family going back generations.
Most were not full time though.

Last edited by groove1; 02-01-2013 at 12:47 AM. Reason: sentence
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  #42  
Old 02-01-2013, 12:44 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

I started in 6th grade while taking saxophone lessons... I walked into this lesson studio and I was amazed at drums from that time. Played for about a year then stopped without a reason... picked it up again 2 years ago and practice regularly. My first kit was a sound percussion...hey you have to start somewhere. My parents just don't like the noise thats about it.
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  #43  
Old 02-01-2013, 01:00 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

My parents were totally against it. They wondered why I didn't want to play a real instrument. They thought the drums were nothing but nosie and not music. They refused to buy me a set so I had to buy my own when I was older and had my own place. It was a cheap beginner set but good enough for learning on.

They finally excepted the fact that drumming is a big part of my life and are glad I enjoy it so much.
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  #44  
Old 02-01-2013, 01:20 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

I started playing drums when I was 14.
Im now 55 years old and my parants still won't talk to me :)
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  #45  
Old 02-01-2013, 01:27 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

Everyone on my mom's side of the family were musicians I don't associate with my father, or his side of the family. My grandfather was a touring musician and played for just about every Bluegrass legend you can imagine. Bill Monroe, Ralph Stanely, Larry Sparks, Joe Isaacs - you name it, and if he didn't play with them, chances are he was good friends. He'd established hometown fame with his own Bluegrass bands in his old age, but on a national scale, he always stopped just short of being 'famous'. Not only was I the first of my family to play drums, but I was also the first to play anything besides Bluegrass or Country music. A lot of people don't believe me when I tell them I was almost 10 years old before I heard Rock music for the first time.

A man who played banjo for my grandfather's band ended up dating my mother, and in addition to Bluegrass, he liked Classic Rock. He had a copy of AC/DC's 'Back In Black' record, and every night I'd go through his bag, and if he had it with him, I'd stay up until near time to go to school listening to the CD over and over again. Then in 01' I believe, my mother bought me my first CD for christmas - it was Bon Jovi's Crush album. It wasn't long after that I got interested in drums.

My mother tried to get me to learn just about everything else except drums, and refused to buy me anything that had to do with the instrument. My first drum set was bought at a garage sale for 60 dollars, and it SUCKED, but I loved it. So anytime I got a little bit of money, I bought anything to do with drums that I could afford, rather it was heads, sticks, beaters, whatever. I just loved going to music stores or pawn shops and buying drum stuff.

I seriously got into drums when I was in highschool. I had friends who wanted to start a band, but couldn't play anything. One of them bought a cheap guitar and learned tabs. The other one was pretty much forced into playing bass. After that we found several different guitarists (all leaving from typical teenage drama), and eventually we just all stopped talking. We claimed our goal was to sound like Mastodon, In Flames, and bands like that, but we done well to make an AC/DC cover recognizable when we played. But I learned from the experience.

My mom's attitude toward me drumming has changed. She has a country music outfit, and I'm often asked to play when her regular drummers aren't available, which is fine because I always get paid. She's now pretty encouraging of it, and actually buys tickets to my bands' shows when she isn't busy with her own music.
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  #46  
Old 02-01-2013, 02:15 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

My dad bought the first set (cb) for him at first. Then I started using it. He's really supportive. My mom, at least, doesn't complain about it, so I guess she's supportive too!
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  #47  
Old 02-01-2013, 02:18 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

Both of my parents are public school music teachers, both graduated from Westchester and both went to Michigan. They've been teaching for like 20 years or something, so naturally they would be happy that their son is in no small way involved in musical pursuits. They're really encouraging and helpful with music and what I want to do for a career. As all parents are, though, they were wary that at first it was just a phase, or a fling, but I think now they get the idea. Dropping that $850 for the first set was a big deal.

Also, I wasn't aware of this until a little bit into when I started, but my grandmother was a drummer during her younger years, which amazed me considering the era she was playing in. Funny story: she was offered her first paying gig after graduating from college and turned them down because they "couldn't believe a girl could play that well"!
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  #48  
Old 02-01-2013, 02:26 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

Nobody in my family is musically inclined as far as I know. But I wanted to be a musician as far back as I can remember. As a kid, most of the toys I owned were toy instruments. Between the ages of 3 and 6, all I did all day long was to listen to my parents' stack of 45 rpm records on a portable record player while accompanying the music on my little drum setup of a toy snare drum and a tambourine that served as a cymbal.

In my early teens, I got into rock and bought a cheapo electric guitar then switched to bass because a band in my neighborhood needed a bass player. My parents did not like me being in a band. They were worried about drugs, drinking and groupies that might come with it. LOL. I went on playing anyway, and no, did not do drugs or unfortunately did not have groupies throwing themselves at me!!! I played bass for over 30 years. I did it professionally during and right after college. Then got a day job and started playing semi-professionally on the weekends.

I always had a soft spot for drums, but it was not until 3 years ago when I was 46 when I took them up for the first time. I was banging on a djembe at an open mic for the fun of it and these two guys invited me to join their band as a percussionist. After a few months they asked me if I would consider switching to drums. I gave it a try and loved it. Few weeks after my first time of sitting at a drum kit, I was playing a paid gig. I knew the songs well from playing percussion on them so playing basic beats on the kit was not that hard. Since then, for the last three years, I have been learning on the job.

And going back to my parents, now they support my weekend warrior activities. They ask for photos from my gigs. My 72 year old mom asks me to play drums for her when she comes over and starts dancing. LOL
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  #49  
Old 02-01-2013, 02:30 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

I'm loving these responses, so personal. Really gives a great background.
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  #50  
Old 02-01-2013, 04:48 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

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Originally Posted by Coldhardsteel View Post
Also, I wasn't aware of this until a little bit into when I started, but my grandmother was a drummer during her younger years, which amazed me considering the era she was playing in.
This reminds me of dance teacher friend (still teaching, well into her 70s). She told me her mother had been the drummer with a dance band.

"She only gave it up when she couldn't really carry her kit any more".

"How old was she then?"

"Getting on for 80"
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  #51  
Old 02-01-2013, 05:16 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

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Originally Posted by larryace View Post
I'm loving these responses, so personal. Really gives a great background.
Yes some interesting reading indeed :)

I found a picture of Watso when he was little with his parents watching him while he practiced on the kit, home sweet home, good memories, isn't it Doc... :)
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  #52  
Old 02-01-2013, 05:30 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!
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  #53  
Old 02-01-2013, 05:37 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

I'm from another family where nobody had any real musical talent or inclination, and probably the only real exposure I had before attending school was the easy-listening station that my mom had running in the living room at all hours. When I got to school, there was a pretty active music program starting at 3rd grade, and I somehow got it into my head that I should take up trumpet. My trumpet instructor firmly told me, after about six months, that I would probably never make it as a musician.

It wasn't until eighth grade that I ventured back into the band room, this time on saxophone. I twice made all-state on saxophone (once alto, once tenor); I picked up bass to play in jazz band, and I picked up drums to play for fun and in pep band. Drums are what stuck (although I have gotten back into playing bass for fun).

During this time my parents were extremely supportive, if a little shocked at the strange left turn my life had taken. I was able to practice at all reasonable hours, have friends over to play music, and attend lessons whenever was convenient, including summer vacation and weekends when it might have been inconvenient for them. I can't imagine how many thousands of dollars and hundreds of miles they expended on my musical aspirations. So they always get free copies of CDs I record on.
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  #54  
Old 02-01-2013, 09:15 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

I always sang before starting to play. I then did the usual hiting anything with knitting needles, wooden spoons etc. The only instrument I ever wanted to play was drums. My parents however didn't have the money for a kit, so tried to interest me in other things- I took violin at school for 8 weeks until I could bear the screeching no more. My mother then arranged accordian lessons which I just flatly refused and then managed to take some (orchesteral) percussion lessons at school, which again I didn't really take to but put up with for the opportunity to play real drums.

It was that which led on to kit playing,. A friend had a bass/snare/hihat set up which we were playing in school when the brass teacher walked by. He asked me to play some basic stuff- all the years on the pots and pans stood me in good stead and I could play everything he asked me for. he put me in touch with a local youth group who needed a drummer- they had their own kit so my lack of gear was no issue. I played with them for nearly 10 years until I moved away for work after university. During that time I bought my own kit and took some lessons.

I was never really discouraged from playing, but I certainly wasn't encouraged until it was very clear that I was never goiong to take up a nice sedate instrument like harp or eukelele...

I'm sure if we had been better off financially, I would have been encouraged more. Since I never was discouraged from pursuing my goal and since it became clear that this was my path, my parents and other family members have been both supportive and proud of my achievements, limited in respect to many others as they have been. There was music in the family before me, but no drums. I'm stoked that my 7 year old is playing now too with her little kit that I built out of orphan drums.My eldest plays clarinet to a good standard, and occassionally shows her music teacher how to play a bosa nova on drums too! Our youngest, who is still some way off music lessons at just 16 weeks old, will be encouraged to take up any instrument she fancies too- its the gift that just keeps on giving as long as you are able to play. I do hope it's drums though...

Drumming is one of the few things I do in my like that gives me pure joy, that and seeing my kids grow and prosper. Humping gear and band politics etc are just the necessary evil which allows me to get my fix once in a while! I have a feeling i would be much less happy generally if i could no longer play.
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  #55  
Old 02-01-2013, 11:45 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

My dad playes guitar, my mom plays bass, my brother plays guitar, so.......... My parents gave me the option what i wanted to learn, so i picked the drums. I believe all kids should get a chance to learn how to play a musical insterment whatever that maybe. i thank my parents for the following reasons

1. buying me my first drumset and putting me right away in lessons.

2. Putting up with the banging and pounding of my drums, that had to be hard to handle. I bet they wished i had chosen guitar more then a few times.

3. Instilling in me the importance of music and learning a insterment that i have enjoyed for 31+ years.

thanks Mom and Dad!
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  #56  
Old 02-02-2013, 02:16 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

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Originally Posted by Mad About Drums View Post
Yes some interesting reading indeed :)

I found a picture of Watso when he was little with his parents watching him while he practiced on the kit, home sweet home, good memories, isn't it Doc... :)
Ah, the memories. You even surmised that my whole family drank like fishes.
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  #57  
Old 02-02-2013, 08:26 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

Do fish actually drink the water they breathe?
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  #58  
Old 02-02-2013, 10:46 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

My mom never wanted a drum set in the house. It wasn't until after she passed away that I bought my first kit that I had been saving up for for years. I would drum from the time I got home from school until my dad got home from work and insisted I stop all the racket. My mom wasn't very musical, but my dad sang in the church choir. My parents never got to know of my huge passion for music, or to see me play shows. I'm sure they would have been supportive down the road, but they weren't for the formative years. Gawd, I wish they could have seen what I made of myself.
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  #59  
Old 02-02-2013, 11:31 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

Mum loved the fact that I had a hobby. She and my close Aunt purchased my first kit for me (man, I miss those two girls...)

Dad, "waste of time...what are you bloody wasting money on that rubbish for". He had his hobbies, I had mine. We were never close in that way.

I quietly always wanted one of my two kids to take up drums seriously and do something with them...never happened. It's a real shame. They'll never understand what they're missing out on.
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  #60  
Old 02-02-2013, 05:08 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

All of my siblings and I started playing piano, taking lessons at least. After a year of hating it I quit. No pressure either way. Then later a year of sax lessons. Same routine. So I quit. then 2 years later I decided to take drum lessons. this was in school and not behind a kit. Did this for 6 years and loved the drums. My Mom was just happy to see me do something other than sports. I had part of a drum kit in my room and I guess everyone tolerated the noise, but my mom never missed a school concert. So all was well I guess. No one complained.
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  #61  
Old 02-02-2013, 05:33 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

I have a lot of musicians in my family. My parents always supported any interest in music. My dad was a musician his whole life. I will always be too.

My parents bought me my initial equipment, but never anything beyond that. The rest was all up to me. They never got me any lessons, and I guess I never asked for any. They were indifferent to whatever music I played, and they didn't care what instrument I played either. They were just happy to see me playing any instrument. My dad was not a big fan of the drums and would have probably preferred seeing me excel as a guitar player to be honest.
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  #62  
Old 02-02-2013, 07:42 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

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Originally Posted by larryace View Post
I'd like to poll everyone here as to the attitude, either for or against, of your parents, in regards to your drumming. I'd also like to know if you come from a long, or short, line of musicians, or not. Obviously this applies to drummers who started out while still under the care of their parents, but feel free to chime in if you started later in life.

My parents got me my first MIJ kit in 1968 when I was 10, so that implies a "for". The previous year I got bongos, but they never really satisfied me. I had restless leg syndrome, I was forever bouncing my right leg. I needed a bass drum. But as I never lost interest playing drums, in the years to follow, my Father definitely regretted helping me get started. I heard him with my own ears express those exact sentiments when I was an adult. He didn't know how huge it would become in my life in 1968, and felt he "lost" me after I got involved with drums. Lol. I would have played regardless, I just would have got my first kit at a later time. But there was no denying the fact that it was inside me and needed to come out. (a nod to a line in John Lee Hooker's "Boogie Chillun")

What I don't understand is...no one in the previous generations of my family, was musical at all, AFAIK. So I don't know where it came from. I did have an older cousin who had, and still owns, a 60's Ludwig black oyster pearl "Ringo" set, but I discovered drums on my own before that. He just helped fuel the fire that was already established.

So, in regards to your parent's attitude... was your drumming encouraged, discouraged, or treated indifferently? Are you the first generation of musicians in your family?
I'm going to assume that since they've financed my little habit when I was 5 maybe they were "for". But I have this sneaking suspicion they didn't expect me to take it as far as I did. Like many parents, they probably thought it was cool that their son wanted to do something, and I had two uncles who played music for the US Army and they played in alot of different places because of it. One had his own jazz combo, and supplied our house with alot of jazz records to listen to. So I think I'm part of the second generation of musicians in my family, and the encouragement was good.

When I was 12 mom would drive me weekly to my lessons, and they were quick to allow me money to buy sticks and a head if I needed it. In fact, it was my dad who took me shopping for my first cymbal bag ($78 back in 1979! Alot of money to a kid) when he saw I had nothing to carry them in when he drove me out for my first gigs - so he knew the cymbals were instruments to be protected. Later I discovered that he was an avid ukulele and mandolin player when he was a kid, but he stopped all of that when he decided to raise a family.

I guess over the years they were very supportive. They let me re-locate to a high school that had an actual marching band, and didn't mind when I spent my summers on the road with a drum and bugle corps, and understood my willingness to study music in college and helped pay for that too. When I started working for the Mouse they were very proud and I think they enjoyed the bragging rights.

Through all of this, I recall dad telling me on the way home from a gig when I was 11, "Make sure you get the trash out in the morning and mow the lawn when you get a chance". My parents were cool.
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  #63  
Old 02-02-2013, 08:22 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

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Do fish actually drink the water they breathe?
Yes, some actually do. The rest absorb it. It's actually interesting stuff, because it's one of the big ways salt-water and fresh-water fishes tend to differ. In general, freshwater fish absorb water through their gills and skin and rarely if ever "drink" water intentionally. Saltwater or ocean fish will usually actively "drink" water, processing out the salt. Even more interesting, is that there are fish who can live in both salt and fresh water; my understanding is that they alter their behavior when in salt water and drink only then.

I had a really cool marine biology teacher in school, very interesting guy and I remember a lot of what he had to say.
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  #64  
Old 02-02-2013, 09:06 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

Cool stuff dog. You would think it would be opposite, the freshwater fish would be the drinkers. I think I'll swallow air, in homage to the salt water fishies.

Do fish burp? What would happen if you put a salt water fish in a vat of club soda?
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  #65  
Old 02-02-2013, 10:57 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

Nothing but support.

In my family 3 out of 5 members make - and have always made - a living off of music (2 of them as musicians, 1 is a promoter/agent).
The remaining 2 members (me & my younger brother) also play music, but we have other professions for paying the bills and only do music on the side. We've both played with many different bands and recorded tho, but nothing to really make a living with.

And also my grandma was a professional opera singer till the day she retired.
So I've pretty much grown up with music really being a normal, everyday thing. Lots of different instruments at the house. Drums was something I picked up because it just felt right, I guess. I've also played the bass and percussions in bands - actually I've probably done more gigs with those instruments than with the drums.

But my mom would have encouraged me to be happy in whatever hobby I would have chosen. I played football for years before even thinking about the drums and she was super-supportive with that too.

Very interesting that stuff about the fish also, I have to say!
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  #66  
Old 02-03-2013, 12:11 PM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

my mum let me have my drum kit in the front room. she liked piano, and had a ton of old vinyl, mainly orchestral/piano arrangements. sibelius, debussy, liszt, chopin etc. subsequently i now have a ton of old vinyl. and a drum kit in the front room.
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  #67  
Old 02-05-2013, 08:08 AM
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Default Re: Your parents' attitude towards your drumming

I would say my parents were supportive, especially my mom. She played piano and took up folk guitar, which my dad and uncle both played. She tried to teach me piano when I was around 6 and ended up sending me to lessons. But I wanted to play guitar and my uncle showed me my first chords so I commandeered my dads guitar. I'd also set up a sort of drum set in the back yard (we had a section fenced off for drying laundry and the dog and I had pretty much free run out there) out of old 5 gal paint buckets I snagged from a construction site down the street. Even to the point of making up some sort of bass pedal out of scrap wood. By 12 or so, I was playing in bands using borrowed equipment and they got me a department store guitar and my dad rebuilt some old amp for me to use. We were pretty poor. Fairly often the band would rehearse in our garage and they tolerated it. Along with tolerating me banging on the drum kit that was left there for "rehearsals" all the time. By 13 they got me some used Silvertone stuff from a pawn shop. All this time my mom was hauling our band to gigs which were pretty much every weekend at some elementary school (we didn't have middle schools in that little town) or city rec center. Looking back, they put up with a lot.
When I was out of school and working at a music store, I sensed my dad was kind of disappointed. And when I gave that up to play full time, it was a bit more obvious. But he never came right out and said anything other than I could do better doing XYZ. And my mom was behind me all the way. At the point I was playing full time, she lived close by and I would go over to her place to work out arrangements on her piano. I have her 2nd piano (she traded the old spinet she got when she moved out on her own for a small grand when she retired) and the Martin guitar she did odd jobs to save up for when she wanted to learn to play folk music with the family.
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