I'm far too immature to read this thread without giggling. Well, I'll be 40 soon, maybe I'll grow out of it then...
I dip my tension rods in vaseline. I have done this for a long time and have never had a problem and it works.
I can't believe all the stuff you all use to lube up the tension rods lol! You're not protecting vital engine parts for 100,000 miles, you're just trying to create less friction on tiny little screws lol!
One small drop of 3 n 1 on the last 4 or 5 threads of the tension rod is all that is needed, you then screw it in, back it out, put your head on and tune it up. Good lord lol!