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Old 09-30-2011, 09:45 AM
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caddywumpus caddywumpus is offline
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Join Date: May 2008
Location: Portland, OR USA
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Default Re: Moral Dilemma: What would you do?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pollyanna View Post
And if the other drummer is just testing the waters, why is it a moral dilemma to say, "Sorry, I gave up other gigs to take this one"?
The more I think about it, and the more I talk with people about it, the less this seems like a moral dilemma. I would love to be "that guy" who would give his gig back, but I enjoy the gig and count on it as part of my income now. Oh, and I'm playing bass in the band, by the way.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pollyanna View Post
Would the bandleader take you up on the guitar offer? Seems the band is doing fine without an extra guitar and it would reduce everyone's cut. And if things got tight, you'd be the most expendable ...
I talked with the bandleader, and he's totally up for trying it out. We're actually looking for a new guitar player at the moment, which is why I brought up the possible switch to guitar--it would also save the band the trouble of looking for a new guitar player.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pocket-full-of-gold View Post
No mate. This is a job. How would it be if you took on an electrical job due to someone leaving, you put in a solid few months of hard work and then he returns and kindly asks for you to put yourself back out on the street (or relegated you to just driving the van) because he changed his mind? The most mature solution would be for Caddy's mate to realise that you can't give up a gig and then just expect it back because he'd like it to be so.
Yeah. I've heard so many analogies that people have offered regarding this situation. I'm getting a clearer picture of what this looks like "from the outside".

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deathmetalconga View Post
To me, it all comes down to: What were the expectations about this? Like, did he say, and did you agree to, something like: "I am leaving town for five months and I'd like to ask you to fill in for me while I'm gone. When I return, you agree to give the gig back to me."
There were no expectations or agreeing to give the gig back or anything. He was moving to a new town. Clean break. Not coming back. Giving up the gig due to moving. We happened to talk, and I happened to get hooked in. It was (is) my gig.

I'm looking forward to talking about it with him tomorrow. I'm going to tell him that I can't give up the gig, but I am going to try out the guitar thing, and if it works out, he's golden and we finally get to work together after all of these years. If not, he'll be a great first call if I need a sub. Thanks everyone for your input! :D
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