Hi all. Would value your opinion here. Am I being unreasonable or not? Would be nice to have the opinion of an outsider.
Our rhythm guitarist makes me want to shove my drumsticks right where the sun don't shine. He is really getting under my skin. I'm normally a pretty easy going guy but he is really getting to me lately.
I suppose I should tell you everything. Basically our rhythm guitarist is not actually very good at guitar. He is mediocre at best. He is holding everyone back and we all know it. He has to get our lead guitarist to teach him everything during the week. finding a tab and doing it himself is beyond him. Our lead guitarist has to learn both parts of guitar and then teach him. Our Rhythm then shows up for rehearsal playing a pretty sub par interpretation. He never practises, he can't learn a song without help and really he is holding us back. We can currently do about 3 songs tops a week because any more and he would not be able to handle it. The rest of us are quite capable of doing around 7+.
This is not the only thing though. He has just recently got a girlfriend. Now his attitude has become even more flaky. For instance a couple of days ago I sent out a message to the band telling them what we are doing for next rehearsal, what songs to learn, who is doing backing where, asking if anyone has a spare mic, telling them I'm going to make some slight variations to drumming in certain parts so it's more like the live version etc. Just the normal stuff that everyone kind of needed to know for the next rehearsal. You know, knowing what songs to learn for next week is in my opinion rather important.
I was met with the normal reply from everyone confirming they understood. Well from everyone except from the rhythm guitarist. He replied with questions. Questions that I had just answered in the same post. He actually asked what songs we are learning. When I polity asked him to please read the message I received the rather charming reply that was along the lines of "I don't have time to read messages, you are taking the band to seriously, this is not a job and you are not my boss".
That message actually made me want to hit him. If anyone else had said that to me they would of been fired on the spot. Problem is he is one of my best mates. Me him and the lead guitar have been mates for years and years. We hang out every week. I really don't know what to do. If I fire him he will completely disown us. I have asked the lead guitarist to have a word with him because if I did it he would take offence and no doubt quit. That's another thing that's really bugging me. I can't actually say anything to him without him throwing a tantrum.
What do I do? Am I just over reacting? Am I just up myself and is this the way I should expect people to act?
Opinions would be rather nice.
Oh not sure if it's relevant but we are all in our early 20s, cover band, UK and me lead and rhythm have been friends ever since college.
This whole experience has put me off working with mates ever again. Well I say that yet I can't actually imagine being in a band without our lead guitarist. He is very talented, has no real ego, accepts criticism and gives it back. He is just perfect. Same with our bassist (not an old friend but he has become one since working with him, he hangs out with us every week now). I just don't understand why out rhythm guitarist can't be the same. Especially when he must know he is holding us all back. If I was in his shoes I would be bending over backwards to please everyone. Gah! What do I do?