Re: I can't take it anymore! Wife smokes, I don't. Tips are welcome!
I've always absolutely HATED cigarette smoke, growing up in a house of chain smokers. I never even tried it because of how disgusting I've always found the habit. I won't even hang out in a bar that allows smoking anymore. Of course, I don't believe in telling others what to do, so I don't care who smokes or where they do it as long as it's not my property.
Marriage is a complicated case. It's simple in my opinion; what happened in the past can't be changed. It doesn't matter that you smoked when you met her - you don't anymore and you find it very distasteful now. If this were my situation, I would put it to her like this; smoking or me.
I would explain that she could have her filthy habit, which is as best, prematurely aging her and making her repulsive to be around or at worst, killing her from the inside. Or, she could have you and a longer, healthier life.
This isn't an overreaction since it's obviously wearing you down and could begin to seriously strain your relationship, if it hasn't already.