Re: Why is it so hard to find people to jam with?
I've had such similar frustrations in the past finding musicians for jamming and mainly on Craigslist, and mainly issues with people being flakes.
I used to post very detailed ads on CL specifying the exact style of music, commitment to jamming, and musical ability I was looking for but found that people are often too intimidated by such parameters OR are looking for something even more serious, and thus never even send a reply. I was limiting borderline potential jammers from responding.
By making my posts more casual and open (for ex. saying that I'm looking for anything from casual 1x month jamming to serious 4x week writing and recording) I started getting more responses from my posts even if I eventually had to back away from some. I would not limit myself from punk or heavy metal ads (styles I wasn't interested in) just to network with the people and see if I could meet anyone through them.
I still have trouble networking and know that the best thing I could do is hit clubs every night and talk to people but that is hard for me. My last bit of advice though, is when you do go to clubs or shows to see bands play, don't be afraid to go up to the lead guitarist and steer a conversation towards a jam session. Even though he's already in a band that's headling the So&So theatre, you never know what other projects he may want to start. Or he may want to replace his drummer.