Re: Why is it so hard to find people to jam with?
The last band I was in (about 4 years ago) lasted for about a year or so, in which time we wrote 4 songs, because the guys weren't serious enough and eventually stopped showing up for practice in addition to forming an acoustic band on the side which they didn't want me in. Lovely!
I was pretty much done after that point and let them know that. Thereafter, I auditioned for about 30-40 established/forming bands over a period close to 2 years within a 100 mile radius. I was looking for a predominantly originals band with some covers. I ran in to whole range of people - covers only bands, 3-piece, blues, horror punk, metal (old and new), straight up rock, country, alt-rock, alt-goth, funk....... couple of which had me come back 3 or 4 times before they made up their mind. Finally, I found the band that I've always wanted to be in (the one I'm in now) two years ago where the chemistry was there, musically, more than I could've asked for, and are now good friends. It an hour and 15 minute drive one way for me to get to practice, but it's well worth it twice a week.
It's just a matter of time, persistence and not losing hope and you will find someone that clicks. Staying open minded (in terms of genre, skill level, location) is a plus as you'll find one sooner - especially if you're dealing with skilled musicians.
BTW, have you looked for a online music forum for your local area - that's how I found my gig - from the Musicians Wanted section.
PEWFLADCC - Chief of Staff