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Old 07-20-2007, 01:14 PM
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Jon Cable Jon Cable is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Lincoln,uk
Posts: 557
Default Re: Lyrix what I wrote for the new album...

Quote:
Originally Posted by millerdakiller View Post
that's a good start man, but the rhyme scheme and rythym are a little predictable for my taste. That's just me though. Try experimenting with different rythmic phrasings in the lyrics.
Thanx bro, my first attempt; the guy I'm 'working' with on this email album asked if I had any ideas for words and thats what came out!! I think its more in a simple poetry style than a song lyric, but surprised me that I could even string it together! Done another, little darker;

The slightest of movements
Releases my pain
All of my sadness
Escapes from a vein
Although there's a sting
Its only so fleeting
The feeling of relief
The joy that I'm meeting.
They ask me why?
They want me to tell
How such tiny cuts
Set me free from hell.
You cant understand
You'll never know
That such simple acts
Can comfort me so
The scars are stigmata
The proof of my pain
My releasing from torture
Over and over again.
The marks are the evidence
That you can't percieve
You can't comprehend
The torment I believe.


Cheerful stuff hey?? JC
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