Thread: Frank Beard
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Old 03-07-2007, 07:55 AM
hoytmale hoytmale is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 1
Default Re: Frank Beard

I have a passing interest in this band "ZZ-Top" as my wife has been known to play their music while washing our oldsmobile wearing short shorts and a cut off shirt.

Personally, I'm a scientist, and I don't know much about the percussion instruments, but I do know a lot about the metabolic process.

In answer to your question sexy Whitney (a misnomer, for "whitney" is a mans name, and men are scientifically incapable of being sexy), Yes most likely Frank beard had breakfast. Most people, animals included, eat breakfast. It is how the metabloic system, or metabolism, gets its daily dose of riboflavin. I already know what you're thinking, WHAT did he have for breakfast.

If we track the flow chart found at THIS LOCATION we find that beared men between the ages of 40-55 have a difficult time digesting egg without following it down with 4 boxes of cereal. Seeing as how Mr. Frank Beard has been having this style of breakfast for years, it is safe to assume that he took his cost dividends (approx $23.50/breakfast) and spent the total sum on something of equal value, yet less mass in order to save time and highlight his personal extravagance, by getting less but paying more.

a quick google search of "$23.50 breakfast" returns the "garden breakfast at thousand cranes" which includes Served with Fresh Orange Juice, Fresh Fruits, Steamed vegetable, Boiled Fish, Japanese Style Poached Egg, Dried Seaweed, Steamed Rice, Miso Soup, and Japanese Pickles.

Through the use of science, we can deduce that he had a pleasent Asian themed breakfast.

As for the shampoo, I do remember a folk tale from my youth where it was fortold the true beared wonder would bathe in the blood of his enemies children, for the beared wonders hair was from satan. Do you believe in Frank Beard? if you do, then you also believe he bathes in childrens blood

Scientifically yours dude
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