You might want to check out www.vdrums.com
One of the admin guys there (Alan) owns/operates V Expressions.
Good headphones are a must for e-drums. I've used several different ones over the years. I like the Audio Technica ATH50. A very popular unit among e-drummers.
Also, there are a lot of drummers doing DIY kits at vdrums. It's a great resource. Here's a pic of my large e-kit. The shells are Keller. The snare is a converted Pearl Firecracker.