Quote:
Originally Posted by MrInsanePolack
For relativity to be considered, something has to be moving relative to something else.

You keep losing me at this requirement that there most be two seemingly intelligent observers. If I'm sitting on a bench and I see a train fly be a relativistic speeds relative to me, I will still see all the appropriate relativistic effects on the train, regardless if there is someone on the train to see them happen to me.
If sticks are moving relative to you at relativistic speeds, you will definitely see relativistic effects, and they will certainly not be limited to time diluation. These sticks will be constantly accelerating so this situation falls under the relm of general relativity, not special relativity where Lorentz equations are as hard as it gets.
Objects are spaghettified as they enter a black hole because of the massive gravity differential across the length of the object that the black hole's gravity well creates.. doesn't have to be a human. The event horizon is the sphere the we would perceive as the black hole's "surface": the sphere surrounding the singularity that's volume is defined where the speed of light is less than or equal to the escape velocity of the black hole.
I feel like I could nit pick definitions(semantics) with you all day, but I won't, this isn't a physics forum, haha. Interesting problem OP. I imagine for two (very massive) sticks alternating are close to the speed light, we'd have a situation close to what happens when two black holes orbit each other are close proximity. The two gravity wells tangle up and do all kinds of crazy stuff, worm holes too if I remember correctly.
Anon: Great idea on the calcs. The way I see it, the stick accelerates coming up and coming down during the stroke. In other words, its 0 m/s at the top of the stroke (10 cm above head), 3e8 m/s as it heads the head. Its not just traveling 3e8 m/s the whole time :) Taking that into consideration, my calcs show that your stick will hit the head at the speed of light if you play 16th notes at 67,500,000,000,000,000,000 bpm.