Thread: Random Thoughts
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Old 04-25-2013, 06:34 PM
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inneedofgrace inneedofgrace is offline
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Location: New Jersey - Exit 5
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Default Re: Random Thoughts

Wow - this is a tough subject and one that hits close to home. My mother died about 7 years ago, after falling down the steps and severly damaging her head. For two months she was incapacitated in the hospital, couldn't communicate and didn't look anything like her original self after they performed major brain surgery on her. She eventually succumbed to an infection, ending a horrid experience for us and my dad. I know she suffered physically during this time, but she probalby suffered emotionally as well.

Last year my dad died in his sleep from a heart attack. For the previous two years, he had rapidly progressing issues with his lungs and was on oxygen. We knew eventually his other organs would give out due to lack of oxygen. As bad as it was, it ended in the best case scenario and it doesn't appear that he suffered very much.

It has now been almost a year since I was diagnosed with esophageal cancer. I didn't have much chance of surviving. Fortunately they discovered it before it spread to my lymph nodes. I underwent extensive and simultaneous chemotherapy and radiation treatments. Followed up by a major 6-hour operation to remove almost my entire esophogus. The initial biopsy indicated that all the cancer was removed and that the surrounding lymph nodes were cancer free. Next week I go back for my first follow up testing, which is a little nerve-wracking.

I have very strong faith, which has gotten me through all this. I'm not really afraid of the results of my dying, because I am confident I'm going to a much better place with no pain or sorrow. But the prospect of going through the dying process, especially if it is from cancer, does not thrill me.

I've seen people go through a very long and painful dying experience, and seen those that perish suddenly. And I've also seen people dying who lose their mental faculties and memory. I don't know which is worse. None of them are pleasant, but they are inevitable.

My prayers go out to all that are going through this experience or have had it happened to a love one. All we can do on this side is to help each other try and get through the process.
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