Re: Suggestions and advice on an electric kit for my situation.
I'd recommend a Roland TD4KX2. I Have used one for over a year now both for practicing and for a few gigs. Mesh heads, simple unit with good drum sounds, very tuneable. practice modes built in if you want to use them. It's just a good solid piece of kit with good capabilities. I've given mine a lot of hammer and it has been moved around a bit too in the back of my car. Still in one piece and going strong.
I don't know what you can get them for in the US but i'd imagine there'd be some good used deals or some new ones still left in some stores at clearance prices now that the line has been replaced. Good luck finding what you want.