Thread: Random Thoughts
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Old 02-02-2013, 12:29 AM
BacteriumFendYoke's Avatar
BacteriumFendYoke BacteriumFendYoke is offline
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Location: Kent, United Kingdom
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Default Re: Random Thoughts

I was compiling a list earlier of all the items that Larryz should stop using if he doesn't want to reap the benefits of the scientific method.

I started with clothes. You can't wear any synthetic fibres (bets are on you have some) anything with synthetic rubber, anything made with modern machining methods or that are made with machines that use oil (modern oil is developed by scientists in the petro-chemical industry) or zips and velcro. That's for starters.

Want to get to work? Well, you can have a car made before about 1930 but you can't have any modern petrol in it and you certainly can't have a modern radio or any electronic systems on board that are controlled by a transistor (quantum mechanics) or that use lasers (CD player) or even microwaves (parking sensors).

Bicycle? Fine so long as you don't have vulcanised tyres.

Walk? Make sure you don't have synthetic soles on your shoes!

So you come home. It's cold. You put on the heating. Oops. Chances are your boiler is controlled by an electronic system. You can't be having that. You can have a fire but you can't use any wood that's been cut with a chainsaw.

You certainly can't use a computer, or the World Wide Web or the Internet. The phone you could use if you have a manual exchange but all the exchanges now are computer-controlled - so you're cut off there. Sending letters? Nope. All the post office sorting stations are computer-controlled and your postman would be using a car with a modern oil system. So you'd have to deliver it yourself.

You want dinner? Fresh out of luck unless you cook it in a gas oven - even then you're relying on computer control for the supply of gas. Make sure you've grown the food yourself because it's almost guaranteed that somewhere along the line there would've been a modern motor vehicle used. Any garden implements you use have to have been hand-made too and can't realistically have anything metal because it's likely that a machine would have been used to make the metal.

So you're hungry, lonely, can't get to work and you're wearing only half your clothes. You think that playing the drums is a good idea.

Fresh out of luck. Drum heads are mylar - a form of plastic. Plastic is synthetic material created and manufactured by scientists. So you're on handmade calfskin heads. That's fine but you can't have any sticks because they're all made by computer and you can't have any Zildjian, Sabian, Meinl or Paiste cymbals. Getting Turkish cymbals would be a challenge without a modern vehicle, too. Chances are your drums have been designed on a computer - as would the hardware, so unless your kit is of a particular vintage, you can't have it.

You go to bed. Sorry. Got a synthetic duvet, sheets or pillows?

I could go on but it's best summed up like this:
Bring Me Coffee or Tea
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