Re: Todd Sucherman here!
Sorry to hear of your issue and it's definitely no fun. Everyone is physically different obviously and ultimately you have to listen to your body. You can't force it to do something it doesn't want to do and pain is your body's way of saying "hold on--take it easy!" So there's certainly no shame in switching to matched grip for the louder moments or when you are experiencing discomfort.
I have nothing to suggest to you unless I saw you play, but one thing that helped me years ago when I was experiencing some discomfort was raising ad flattening my snare drum placement ever so slightly. Perhaps try that. But as I said, you have to listen to your body.
I hope this helps and I wish you pain free playing!