I also just came up with a solution. The T-nut is the culprit - not the bolt - so I sought to eliminate it. I went old school with a hex nut:
The old Ludwig nuts obviously don't fit the 8mm bolt, so I took an M8 nut and ground down the sides so that the old Ludfwig wrench (which I keep with me anyway) would work. Folds down nicely, and the ball/arm housing hits the head's aluminum rim, so there's no contact with the wrap or wooden hoop:
The tom post sticks a bit beyond the hoop, but at least the whole thing will fit in a bag!
But I do like the low profile wing nut idea, will look for one of those!