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Old 05-16-2012, 08:32 PM
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larryace larryace is offline
"Uncle Larry"
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: In beautiful Bucks County, PA
Posts: 15,528
Default Re: How do you tell your frontman that we dont want him anymore?

No matter what, it's gonna be a mess. My suggestion is be straight up, without attacking. Never use the word "You". Always use the word "We". Rather than say, "you're not doing this or that" say "we feel that as a result of forgetting words, tardiness etc. we want so and so to front the band". It will still make emotions fly I'm sure, it's unavoidable. So just accept that, expect it, don't engage him, let him blow off his steam, don't react, and stand firm. (Like a parent when a kid is throwing a tantrum. Stay calm)

I don't have much sympathy for someone who doesn't do their job. I just quit a band I have been in since 2004 because the main guy....his skills have gone backwards to the point that he's falling apart musically. I work hard to keep my skills up. If he had just maintained his prior level, I wouldn't be upset, but he was digressing with every gig and rehearsal. Finally I had enough and walked out. I detailed everything that I felt in an email, I called him out on everything. He offered excuses which I flat out didn't buy and told him why I didn't buy them.

So he feels I attacked him. I just offered my perceptions of what was going on, and like I said, I have no sympathies for grown men who don't do their job. He needed to hear the harsh truth. It was an act of kindness, really. If I didn't care about him, I wouldn't have attacked him lol. I'm not afraid of ruffling feathers anymore. I kind of like it actually :) Can I break the news to him?

You could show him this thread too....
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