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drummerchick435 01-25-2009 05:12 AM

Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
Ok. After 4 years of teaching myself drums and waiting until my parents could afford drum lessons, I finally got a drum teacher in August. At first, I just saw him as my drum teacher. Now, I am starting to see him as a potential friend, and I've been wanting to just hangout with him. However, he's at least 20 years older than me (I'm 19), and I know he likes me as a student but not as a friend which I can understand. Nonetheless, I still want to be his friend, only his friend. I'm definitely not crushing on him. As I am going away to college in August, I won't be taking drum lessons from him. What I'm trying to ask is: How do I handle this? Is it weird to want to be friends your drum teacher? Are any of you friends with your drum teacher?

LM201 01-25-2009 05:19 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
I'm friends with my first drum teacher. I had him for two years, then our family started on hard times. I hung out with him like twice a week or so, and he'd still give me help if I asked for it, he's awesome. I live in Tennessee now and when I visited California in October, he let me stay with his family. I'm 15 and this guy is like a second father.

My band's piano player is a student of Reese Wynans (Organ player for ex-Stevie Ray Vaughn), he helped us with getting our band some gigs and I hang out with him every once in a while

drummer girl09 01-25-2009 05:21 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
I love my drum teacher. He's awesome. I think he might consider me as a friend. He gave me a hug (fatherly hug). I don't think there is anything wrong with it. Plus he considers me to be one of his best students (not trying to brag AT ALL), so that might have to do with something.

I was actually considering to move to a different place to get lessons, but I like the whole staff and my drum teacher to much to move right now. The reason of moving was pretty small too.

drummerchick435 01-25-2009 05:24 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by LM201 (Post 532934)
I'm friends with my first drum teacher. I had him for two years, then our family started on hard times. I hung out with him like twice a week or so, and he'd still give me help if I asked for it, he's awesome. I live in Tennessee now and when I visited California in October, he let me stay with his family. I'm 15 and this guy is like a second father.

My band's piano player is a student of Reese Wynans (Organ player for ex-Stevie Ray Vaughn), he helped us with getting our band some gigs and I hang out with him every once in a while

Thanks! That's kind of how I see my drum teacher. He's like a second father too.

Cool story about your band's piano player. I'd love to take a lesson from Mike Portnoy or someone like that.

drummerchick435 01-25-2009 05:27 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by drummer girl09 (Post 532935)
I love my drum teacher. He's awesome. I think he might consider me as a friend. He gave me a hug (fatherly hug). I don't think there is anything wrong with it. Plus he considers me to be one of his best students (not trying to brag AT ALL), so that might have to do with something.

I was actually considering to move to a different place to get lessons, but I like the whole staff and my drum teacher to much to move right now. The reason of moving was pretty small too.

Thanks! It's great to know I'm not alone and weird. My teacher also thinks I'm one of his best students, I guess.

DrumEatDrum 01-25-2009 05:39 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
Not odd at all.

I remained friends with several different teachers over the years. Some I still see from time to time.

ExPLiciT 01-25-2009 05:42 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
im friends with my teacher. though there is only a 10 year difference in age. he always invites me to his shows. i saw him play at warped tour and we hung out for like half the day and went to see other bands together. adn he helped me out of a couple of bad times i had. and he is always lenient about paying him, if i dont have it hell let me pay him next week. a number of times he just gave me free lessons cause i was having some money trouble. he also gives me all kinds of advice outside of music too.

it is always easier to play in front of a friend then it is a teacher, IMO. which might make it easier for you.

drummer girl09 01-25-2009 05:47 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by ExPLiciT (Post 532945)
im friends with my teacher. though there is only a 10 year difference in age. he always invites me to his shows. i saw him play at warped tour and we hung out for like half the day and went to see other bands together. adn he helped me out of a couple of bad times i had. and he is always lenient about paying him, if i dont have it hell let me pay him next week. a number of times he just gave me free lessons cause i was having some money trouble. he also gives me all kinds of advice outside of music too.

it is always easier to play in front of a friend then it is a teacher, IMO. which might make it easier for you.

Sounds like an awesome drum teacher! Mine gave me a shirt for free...but not lessons, ha! But it is good to have a great drummer/musicians as your friend, and teacher for any questions you have.

That is true about it easier to play in front of a friend than a teacher. Never thought of that. It's more fun too. What is IMO?

LM201 01-25-2009 05:51 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by drummer girl09 (Post 532946)
Sounds like an awesome drum teacher! Mine gave me a shirt for free...but not lessons, ha! But it is good to have a great drummer/musicians as your friend, and teacher for any questions you have.

That is true about it easier to play in front of a friend than a teacher. Never thought of that. It's more fun too. What is IMO?

In my opinion 20405435423543245

drummerchick435 01-25-2009 05:51 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by DrumEatDrum (Post 532943)
Not odd at all.

I remained friends with several different teachers over the years. Some I still see from time to time.

Thanks! It really is great to know I'm not weird.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ExPLiciT (Post 532945)
im friends with my teacher. though there is only a 10 year difference in age. he always invites me to his shows. i saw him play at warped tour and we hung out for like half the day and went to see other bands together. adn he helped me out of a couple of bad times i had. and he is always lenient about paying him, if i dont have it hell let me pay him next week. a number of times he just gave me free lessons cause i was having some money trouble. he also gives me all kinds of advice outside of music too.

it is always easier to play in front of a friend then it is a teacher, IMO. which might make it easier for you.

He sounds like an awesome teacher!

I agree that playing in front of friends is easier than playing in front of a teacher.

Quote:

Originally Posted by drummer girl09 (Post 532946)
Sounds like an awesome drum teacher! Mine gave me a shirt for free...but not lessons, ha! But it is good to have a great drummer/musicians as your friend, and teacher for any questions you have.

That is true about it easier to play in front of a friend than a teacher. Never thought of that. It's more fun too. What is IMO?

IMO = In My Opinion

Der Februar 01-25-2009 06:47 AM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
It's not weird or anything but other people will think it is. Watch Juno.

darkstar442 01-25-2009 04:39 PM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
its not weird im friends with mine. i have been taking for like 3-4 years from him. hes lik a bro to me

larryace 01-25-2009 05:56 PM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
There's no age limit on friends. Older persons enjoy being looked up to and guiding younger people and the younger people benefit from having someone with more life experience to act as a sounding board. It's a win win, but you have to avoid the whole male/female pitfall. I think it's great as long as lines aren't crossed.

eddiehimself 01-25-2009 06:09 PM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
i think my drum teacher did a good job of pretending to be your friend.

drummerchick435 01-25-2009 08:50 PM

Re: Being Friends With Your Drum Teacher
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Der Februar (Post 532953)
It's not weird or anything but other people will think it is. Watch Juno.

As long as he and I don't hang out in each others' houses late at night, it won't be a problem. Unlike Juno, I have standards when it comes to getting intimate with men. Not until marriage. I just like him as a friend/mentor.

Quote:

Originally Posted by darkstar442 (Post 533028)
its not weird im friends with mine. i have been taking for like 3-4 years from him. hes lik a bro to me

Thanks! Come Monday, I think I'll express my appreciation for him, and I'll see where he want to go from there. If he wants to keep our relationship as teacher-student, I guess I'll just have to live with it. If he wants to pursue a deeper relationship, I'll be happy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by larryace (Post 533048)
There's no age limit on friends. Older persons enjoy being looked up to and guiding younger people and the younger people benefit from having someone with more life experience to act as a sounding board. It's a win win, but you have to avoid the whole male/female pitfall. I think it's great as long as lines aren't crossed.

In some ways I do look up to him. He's really the only one who has 100% encouraged me to pursue my dream of being a professional musician. Other people have encouraged me, but they say things like "You'd better not quit your day job." or "Wait until after college so you have something to fall back on." I sometimes call him my "music dad" because my real dad doesn't quite understand my passion.

Quote:

Originally Posted by eddiehimself (Post 533051)
i think my drum teacher did a good job of pretending to be your friend.

As far as I know, he does genuinely like me. He told my mom (who told me) that he loves teaching me because of my passion and ability. I can tell he hates it when time runs out in our lesson. I certainly hope he isn't pretending. I like genuine, honest people.


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