My situation is the exact opposite. When I am playing with friends orlow key gigs I focus totally on the groove and love it. I can sit back, have fun, make money and enjoy the music and the other musicians...I humbly think that both of them are important. It is so important to groove and stay in context of the music (if you want to get hired...and called back). Yet, if they say "give the drummer some" then you should be able to rip (again, within the context of the music)
When teaching my students new patterns, drum fills, etc, I always show them how to play it with in a musical context first. I think it is far more impressive to play a extremely complex lick that fits with the music, rather than whipping our useless licks at any given time.
Honestly, drummers can go back and forth with this topic all day. I think it all comes down to what you want from your drumming. If you expect to be a working drummer, performer, session drummer, etc, then you are going to have to learn to contain the wild spazz moments. But if drumming is just a hobby or something that is fun or you are just messing around with friends, then there is nothing wrong with knowing how to execute some insanely fast spicy double pardiddle fla fla triple egg whites while crossing over from your hi hat to the trash can ;-)
There are many times when I am on a paying gig that bands want me to take a solo and I'm not talking about one, I am talking around 4 per gig, OR the music calls for power endurance and fast fills and fast playing. When this occurs I do what I do and thats that. Some bands actually hire me because they like my groove but also like my chops.
So my laid back moments are usually with friends, at home with the headphones or low key gig where I have been hired to play soft jazz or maybe a wedding gig but I also have gigs and sessions come up where I am expected to bring the groove right along with chops.
In a nutshell it pays to have groove just as it does to have chops. Just as long as you can use them appropriately