Just got home from a gig and I'm just so bummed

TColumbia37

Silver Member
Sorry if this is the wrong place or if it seems in bad taste, but I just want to vent for a short moment.

For starters, this week has been the worst I have experienced in a very long time, but the reasons for that I will not get into. I was excited that it was Friday, and that I had the whole weekend off and I was hoping things would turn around with the gig I had tonight. Leading up to it, I wasn't very excited about it, as I was volunteered to run sound, whilst also playing in two out of the four acts booked. In addition to that, I have a bit of a shoulder injury (not anything serious).

But we got there and set up, and my first set went okay, but I royally flubbed up a key fill in our second song, and it just set me in a bad place right off the bat. The rest of that set wasn't a complete wreck, but it was a bit of a mess. Two of the other bands played following that, and then I was playing in the closing act. That set went shockingly well, and everybody seemed to have fun. A little too much fun, maybe.

The last song of our set closes with a bit of a 'breakdown' in which everybody usually makes it a point to freak out to provide a big ending. Well, during this time, our guitarist got on his knees at the front of my kick drum, and just started rocking it forward towards him, whilst I was still playing. Once I realized what he was doing, I darted him a look to express "HEY DON'T DO THAT YOU IDIOT!" He stopped, and we finished the set. During teardown, I went and checked out the top of my kick drum to make sure he hadn't marred the finish from rubbing it against the hoop of the rack tom. It seemed fine, so I just went forward with putting everything away. When I put the kick drum into its case, I noticed something that appeared unusual about the batter side hoop. I looked closer to find it split all the way through. I'm so bummed. He gave me $60 to purchase a new hoop.

I play a Yamaha Rock Tour. That hoop is irreplaceable. I made mention of that, and he insisted that if I can't find an exact replacement that he would buy me a new kick drum. I then tried to explain that if I were even able to find an exact replacement kick drum, it would be $250+, but he kept insisting on it. He didn't seem to get it when I tried to explain to him that just funding a new hoop is fine, and that I was just bummed out about it and his money wasn't going to change it.

So now I'm shopping around online for a hoop that is as close as possible to matching the finish.

Sorry this was so long and pointless, I'm just so bummed.
 

BillRayDrums

Gold Member
For starters, don't be so hard on yourself. It's only music and no one was hurt in the commission of the musical faux pas that occurred.

As for your hoop, that's a bummer but here's what you do- go to drumfactorydirect.com and buy a new hoop and mark it up as a character wound. It can be replaced.

Sucks that it happened but all you can do is chalk it up to experience. And if that kind of stuff happens again then let them find another drummer, because that seems to be a bit of a problem in certain areas. Supply/demand...
 

larryace

"Uncle Larry"
A little disrespectful on the guitarists part?

It would have been justice if you threw his guitar off stage and called it even.
 

eric_B

Senior Member
I can understand very well how you feel. I also take good care of my own and other peoples gear and I would be seriously annoyed if something like that happened.

However, I also had to learn and accept that when you drag your gear around regularly it is almost impossible not to get some marks or other damage. Bill Ray 'character wound' description seems to be spot on.

I would take it different if someone did it on purpose but as it seems it happened in the heat of the moment and the fact that he offers to buy a new hoop or even a new bass drum tells me he realizes he made a mistake and is trying to make it right.
 

konaboy

Pioneer Member
I can understand very well how you feel. I also take good care of my own and other peoples gear and I would be seriously annoyed if something like that happened.

However, I also had to learn and accept that when you drag your gear around regularly it is almost impossible not to get some marks or other damage. Bill Ray 'character wound' description seems to be spot on.

I would take it different if someone did it on purpose but as it seems it happened in the heat of the moment and the fact that he offers to buy a new hoop or even a new bass drum tells me he realizes he made a mistake and is trying to make it right.

I totally agree with this. Yeah it sucks and I would be mad about it, but have to give the guy credit on giving you money right away and offering to pay for a new bass drum if necessary. That's a stand up thing you won't see many people do.

As for the mistake, it's part of playing and it happens, and will happen again. It's not a matter of if it will happen again it will happen again and is part of being human and not being perfect (which is impossible) I'm extremely hard on myself as well, however over the years I've learned you just have to let some things go. Focusing on the mistake as you found out only puts you in a bad place doing something you love to do. Mistakes happen, just roll with them, learn from them and don't let them get you down
 

richkenyon

Silver Member
I would have left the guitarist unable able to play guitar for some period of time. You should congratulate yourself on being so mild-mannered!
 

braincramp

Gold Member
" but I royally flubbed up a key fill in our second song, and it just set me in a bad place right off the bat."

Hate when this happens! I can so relate, some mistakes are hard to shake. Had this happen a few times for sure the most memorable was as a fill in drummer, I botched the ending in the 2nd or 3rd song and it just threw me in a bad zone, I always come back, but it can last a song or two or even rest of the set and once you start doubting your knowledge of the material it can get scary. Nothing like 24 hrs notice to learn 30+ songs.
 

TColumbia37

Silver Member
As for your hoop, that's a bummer but here's what you do- go to drumfactorydirect.com and buy a new hoop and mark it up as a character wound. It can be replaced.
When I say that it's irreplaceable, I mean to say that I can't get a black textured ash hoop to match. I do plan on getting a hoop to use, it just sucks that I can't get the same one.

I would take it different if someone did it on purpose but as it seems it happened in the heat of the moment and the fact that he offers to buy a new hoop or even a new bass drum tells me he realizes he made a mistake and is trying to make it right.
Yes, I very well understand that and I'm not upset with him per se, I'm just bummed that it happened. He's a good friend of mine and I know he didn't intend on damaging anything. I know something bad is bound to eventually happen when I take my gear out so often. I would just be happier about it if the damage was by my doing, as then I could only blame myself. His apology and willingness to replace it is plenty good enough for me.

Hate when this happens! I can so relate, some mistakes are hard to shake. Had this happen a few times for sure the most memorable was as a fill in drummer, I botched the ending in the 2nd or 3rd song and it just threw me in a bad zone, I always come back, but it can last a song or two or even rest of the set and once you start doubting your knowledge of the material it can get scary. Nothing like 24 hrs notice to learn 30+ songs.
Yeah, it sucks, but I can only move forward and learn from my mistakes. The guys wanted to speed the song up a little, which puts that fill just a little outside of my comfort zone. I've decided that I'm going to work out an alternate fill that I'm more comfortable with for the times that I'm not confident going into it.
 

Galadrm

Senior Member
I have had issues in my band with members damaging my gear, and I feel the same way in regards to the fact that even though they offer to pay for a replacement, I find their disrespect of other peoples belongings quite disheartening. In the end though, friendships are more important than gear and you just have to work a way around any issues.

In regards to messing up drum fills or other aspects of performance, I was watching a great band the other night and they had a whole set of absolutely wicked songs, halfway through one of their guitarists amps/pedals stuffed up and he dropped out. They played a couple of songs to fill the time and when the other guitarist came back they absolutely killed it, and gave us an extra big encore as an apology. So in my opinion you just have to be really mentally strong in those situations and continue to rock the crowd, because they are not there to focus on your mistakes, they just want to dance and take what you give them in terms of the energy in your music.
 

eclipseownzu

Gold Member
If you are that worried about getting the hoop to match exactly I would recommend not taking that kit out of the house. Get a gigging kit that can take the abuse and wont break the bank if it gets beat up. I have had stage divers crash through my kit, guitars thrown through my bass reso head, singers throw cymbal stands at audience members (with cymbal attached), bassists stand on the bass drum, probably gallons of beer spilled on it and myriad other things that I cant even recall. It happens, its live music and sometimes shit gets weird. Just be glad you didnt play for Nirvana!

I give the same advice to guitarists. Dont bring your $2000 Les Paul custom on stage at a metal show in a dive bar. Its going to get messed up and feelings are going to get hurt.
 

GruntersDad

Administrator - Mayor
Staff member
Put the batter hoop on the reso side and make or buy a new one that is close in finish for the batter side. Then kick the guitarist in the nuts.
 
T

The SunDog

Guest
I second the kick in the nuts. My guitarist put his foot on my kick, then stood on it and leaped off. I flipped out on the guy. Like yours, my shells aren't made by DW anymore, forget hard to find, more like impossible, not to mention the immense cost of a single bass drum. I was incredulous at his utter lack of concern for my gear so I can totally understand how your feeling.
 

Midnite Zephyr

Platinum Member
So the moral to the story, if you have a nice kit, unless you're playing the Lincoln Center, you're best to leave it at home and have a gig kit that sounds good.
 

Superman

Gold Member
So the moral to the story, if you have a nice kit, unless you're playing the Lincoln Center, you're best to leave it at home and have a gig kit that sounds good.
This is what I do, but some people think I'm crazy. My good stuff stays home where no one hears it but me, and my lesser stuff comes out.
 

eric_B

Senior Member
This is what I do, but some people think I'm crazy. My good stuff stays home where no one hears it but me, and my lesser stuff comes out.
And probably (give or take a few) 95% of the people in the audience won't hear the difference anyway.
 

larryace

"Uncle Larry"
Ya, I think I agree with you. He could have possibly just retaliated with slapping the cymbal instead. I hope it wasn't a nice cymbal.
The bass player was a dick. You don't do that onstage. He could have slid the hi hat away from the drummer with his foot, just to inconvenience him, for a laugh. I bet that cymbal edge got dented if not cracked on that fall. Whereas his bass probably didn't get hurt.

But you have to allow for some anger. The drummer did start it. Still, the bass player did exhibit bad doggy type stage behavior.

Cool band name, right?

Bad Doggy.
 

Muckster

Platinum Member
What is it about Bass players? There was a bass player that always loved to hit my crash cymbal with the neck of his bass. Never understood why he was doing that because he was only doing more damage to his bass than the cymbal. I asked him several times to stop but he kept on doing it until i put up a heavy ride in its place and angled the same as the crash. He hit that cymbal at rehearsal and split the headstock on his bass. I smiled and i never had a problem with him again. Lucky for him this was not at a gig.
 
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